Something Different
by AlwaysLoveActually
Summary: What happens when a chance of fate pushes Severus Snape and Lily Potter together, more than once, after so many years of separation?. Will the two make amends or will it go up in flames?. Set eight years after the first war has ended. AU. Rating will change to T eventually.
1. Prologue

**DISCLAIMER:** All rights to the characters, recognized plot lines, places, etc. belong to the wonderful J.K. Rowling.

 _Prologue_

~31st October, 1981~

The wind catching beneath his black cloak and carrying it back, the man's feet were swift. One step after the other, the man walked with urgency. Searching the slim abandoned streets, his gaze fell on a near house. The garden gate, creaking in the wind, was opened wide; the house door askew. Beginning to move forward once more, this time with even more haste, the man went down the garden path, entering the house without hesitation. His body felt cold and his chest constricted with each new step. He could hear a high pitched sound from within the house, which brought him little comfort. He knew what he was going to find, but something kept him going. All the lights within were on. Passing through the drawing room, he followed the sound. Despite his in-charge demeanor, his eyes were distant, lost. Into the kitchen, there it was. The source of the sound. A kettle sat on the ignited stovetop, the water long gone he observed as he switched the stove off. His fingers lingered on the switch, he seemed reluctant to let go. She'd touched the switch, maybe only half an hour previously. He clinged to that, the notion that her last minutes of happiness, undoubtedly, had been in that particular room. With her husband, most likely, talking late in the night over tea while their son slept happily only metres above. Resentment surged up suddenly, but the man pushed it back down. Now was not the time. Moving out of the kitchen, he began to take the stairs two at a time. The house lighting ceased as he progressed up. Reaching the floor landing, a sudden scream sounded. The man abruptly looked towards the source, a room only a few doors away was cracked open. He could see movement behind the door, glimpsing the familiar long dark robes. Blood ran to his ears as he took out a sleek piece of wood from beneath his robes. Fingers gripped tightly around the weapon, the man's skin was pasty. Striding carefully down the hall, he pressed his ear to the door. There was only crying and then, _pop_. Complete silence. Pushing the door open, the man found himself in a darkened nursery. Fumbling in his steps, he let out a heavy breath. A man laid dead by his feet. No visible marks on the lifeless body, the guy's eyes were still open behind his thin wire-framed glasses. Walking passed the first body, the man stopped dead almost immediately after. Another figure laid on the ground, a woman's body this time. Even in the dim moonlight, he recognized the flaming red hair.

Stumbling forward, the man fell to the floor. "Lily…." he murmured, taking her form in his arms, cradling her limp body. "No, no, no….." he repeated, over and over. "Please, Lily, please no…" his words poignant, tears lightly flowed down his cheeks. Rocking back and forth, the man cried, feeling as if he was in a dream–a nightmare. And then, there was a sharp exhale and cough. But it wasn't from the man fallen on the floor, no. Looking taken aback, the man looked to the woman in his arms. Realization hit him and the man jumped back. The woman's eyes still closed, she murmured. She hadn't been dead, she'd been unconscious. Relief swelled and the man watched her for a minute, cautiously. Eventually standing, he gave the woman on the floor a searching look, not understanding how it was possible. How could she be alive? Looking to the child in the room for the first time that night, the child seemed calm. The boy's eyes were wide as the man locked gazes with him. The boy's eyes were like his mother's, like Lily's–emerald green and fiery. The thing the man failed to notice as he watched the child was the mark across Harry Potter's forehead. This was the thing that would mark not just Harry Potter but Severus Snape for a future beyond imagination. Turning on his heels after one last look at the scene before him, Severus left the house. None the wiser on what really had just transpired.

Breathing in the fresh air, Severus let the alleviation sink in. She was alive, breathing. Lily Evans had–by some miracle–survived, and by even more of a shock, so had her son; but how? How could two out of three people survive an attack like that? Could they?, maybe he'd imagined it…..but Severus knew he hadn't. Severus was never one for fantasies or fiction, in fact he wasn't sure he even had enough imagination for such eccentric realities as that which he lived in in that moment. Surviving the Dark Lord, impossible. Or, so he'd thought. Mind drifting to his Master, Severus realized that he would surely be called upon soon, but still there had been nothing. No burning pain, nothing–dead air. And this made Severus' night all the stranger.

As Severus walked towards the edge of the street, he stayed hidden in the shadows. Turning on the spot as he came to a stop abruptly, Severus disappeared. Appearing miles from the small cottage house in Godric's Hollow, Severus found himself in a squalid home. The house was dreary, dust lining the fireplace mantel, the settee was covered in a tinted white sheet. An unusual carpet beneath the settee and ornamental table, the colors were worn. A kitchen in the back could be seen, looking just as bleak as the rest of the house. It was nice in a way though, simple. Nothing overwhelming.

Severus paced the living room his eyes on the floor. He couldn't think straight, this wasn't how it was suppose to happen. Flicking his wand towards the hearth, flames flared up with a _whooshing_ sound. As he surveyed the flames for a pause, Severus gave a short breath before he resumed his pacing. They, the Potters, weren't supposed to have been found. Lily and the boy may have survived but they still weren't safe. Their only form of protection was now gone and with it so was their safety. Severus murmured to himself, arms crossed in thought. No doubt by now Dumbledore had located Lily and the child and brought them, if not to Hogwarts, than some other guarded location. But what happens when they're not protected?, what happens when Dumbledore isn't there to protect them? How long would this war last?, how long would she and the boy have to continue on in fear? They were safe for the time being…that'd have to do. And, when she, Lily, needed more, when, if, a time came that she wasn't protected, Severus would be there. He'd help her when she needed it, he'd protect her….after all, isn't that what he'd told Dumbledore he was there for? To keep Lily Evans…...Potter, safe? On that note, Severus stopped his pacing. He knew his next move, it was the same as his last; Protect Lily, whether she was an Evans or a Potter, and with that came protecting the child, her child. Potter's child.

Wasting no more time, Severus went to the kindled fire. Promptly taking a handful of floo-powder out of the small bowl on the fireplace mantel, Severus walked into the flames, "Hogwarts." Spinning and twisting into nothingness, Severus stepped back out of the channel into the accustomed office. Brushing off the soot, he looked around the room. Annoyance rose, Dumbledore appeared not to be there. Glancing at the clock on the wall, Severus gave an irritated breath. It was almost one, where else could he be? Figuring his chances of finding Dumbledore were less likely if he went and searched the entire school, Severus settled on just waiting. And so, taking the seat in front of the desk, Severus waited impatiently.

Not even seconds had passed since Severus had settled into the office chair when the door swung open. A large group piled into the office and Severus blinked in surprise. Of course he'd been expecting this, but not so quickly. It'd been maybe thirty minutes since he'd left Godric's Hollow. Had the news really spread that fast? The room was in chaos, voices loud as everyone spoke at once. Each asked the same idiotic questions Severus could've answered in mere seconds. Rolling his eyes, Severus stood as Dumbledore caught his gaze and proceeded to look to the people around. Each person looked to Albus Dumbledore for the answers; none thinking for themselves. _God, we're all just puppets_ , Severus derided distastefully. Severus knew he was a puppet too, perhaps even more so than the rest. He was more like a pawn in a chess game. Silence fell over the room as Dumbledore raised a hand, as he did to school children during the feasts. Immediate silence. "I'm aware you all must have many questions about what has transpired tonight, but I'll ask you to hold those questions until after I explain what I know." No one spoke, all eyes were glued to Dumbledore as he spoke. Taking this as a sign to continue on, Dumbledore said, with a heavy sigh, "As I'm sure you've all heard, the Potters were attacked earlier this evening-"

"Are they okay?!, is the boy alive?" A squat woman with homely attire and red hair, asked. As Dumbledore replied, his usual demeanor remained, "The boy is alive and unharmed, as is Lily. Both are with Madam Pomfrey as we speak…"

"And James?" Another asked pressingly. Severus looked up at those words, he couldn't help but want to see people's reaction to the news. Sickened by himself, Severus swallowed and looked back to the floor. "James Potter died, saving his family…" Dumbledore said, sadness evident in his voice. A low murmur erupted from the confirmation while people gasped in shock, and a few cried timidly at the news.

"Has anyone told Sirius and Remus?" Someone else asked over the murmurs. Nodding his head, Dumbledore replied, "They're both with Lily and Harry in the infirmary and I believe that it's best we give them all their space while they mourn–"

"How'd this happen, Dumbledore?" Shacklebolt asked, his low voice resonating through the room and bringing another silence to the room. "From what I've gathered, speaking with Lily and I'm sure Severus can confirm," another wave of murmurs at Severus' name, "The Potters' trust was mislead. A mole on the inside gave their location away," Dumbledore explained steadily. "A mole? To give away their location, it would've had to have been-"

"Yes, their secret keeper–Peter Pettigrew." Roars of anger sounded at this and Dumbledore waited patiently for them to settle until one man–Severus didn't recognize him–said ruefully, "And what about him?!" the man's eyes flew to Severus. More voices rose, now of agreement. Severus kept his stand, gaze forward and unwavering. "Severus is here by my request and I ask you all to listen intently when I say that I trust him in full, not only with my own life, but with all of yours. He is here to help and be of service, just as all of you are."

"He's one of them!"

"He's a bloody Death Eater, Dumbledore!"

Shaking his head, Dumbledore repeated, "I trust Severus, just as much as I trust each of you." Another, one Severus knew as Fabian Prewett, gritted his teeth as he looked back to the others. Fabian's brother, Gideon, met Severus' gaze, hesitated and then dropped his eyes downward. Shacklebolt, clearing his throat, broke the tension, "What's our next move, Dumbledore?" Severus saw a flicker of hesitation in the older man's eyes, and was surprised as he said, "I'm glad you ask this, I suppose this is the best time to announce...I've received word...that is to say, there's a rumor..."

"About what?"

To which Dumbledore responded evenly, "Words spread, and it may not be true, that Voldemort has fallen. Or, at least, has been greatly weakened."

No one dared to speak, even Severus stood in shock. Wouldn't he know if that was the case? Was that even possible? As if reading his mind, Edgar Bones spoke up, his voice quiet, "How's that possible?...is-is it-"

"Severus?, have you heard any word about this?" Dumbledore asked, walking around his desk, on his own train of thought. "No...I–I haven't heard anything of this…" The pieces clicking into place, suddenly Severus understood. That would explain why there'd been no summon or call from the Dark Lord….But could it really be? Subconsciously gripping his forearm, Severus met Dumbledore's gaze; and then he knew. There was no question in the older man's eyes, the Dark Lord had fallen…...


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The stories varied, each more exaggerated than the last. The only truth to most tales being that Harry Potter, by some far chance, had vanquished the darkest wizard of all time. People celebrated in the weeks that followed, making it a month-long event. Even the muggle's were aware of a change. The streets more crowded than they'd been in years, people hugged and rejoiced openly. Some even yelling across muggle populated streets to their friends about the news. People cried, some of happiness and some of sadness. Finally giving those who'd died a proper farewell, funerals were common. People showed up at funerals for those they didn't know. It was if all of Wizarding Britain showed up to each funeral. The world was in a new chaos. A chaos split between resolution and the past. Hundreds of glasses raised to Harry Potter, it appeared the only one not celebrating the victory were those who knew James Potter.

Mourning the loss on their own time, Sirius and Remus were intent on not showing weakness in front each other or Lily. And Lily did the same for them. James Potter's funeral was one of the largest funerals in those following weeks. More people than Lily knew alive showed up to pay their respects while Lily would force a smile and nod in thanks. She only managed to say a small, "Thank you for coming," whenever she was approached. The ceremony was quick, a few of James' friends, including Remus, went up and spoke before James was buried and everyone broke off, all visiting with one another across the large open plain. Lily hadn't been surprised when Sirius had declined the suggestion to speak at the funeral, both Lily and him unable to control their emotions like Remus. The whole evening had felt surreal, and Lily secretly prayed that she'd wake up in a few minutes from the catastrophic dream and have James by her side again. Alas, no such luck.

Sirius and Remus, however, were always by her side. Always there for her. And for this, Lily was thankful. In all the havoc proceeding James' death, they'd been the only ones who had really helped her in any real way. Both repeatedly taking Harry for her when she needed a break, without question. Neither pressured her to share or open up. Sometime she'd feel guilty for not giving them time for themselves, but knew they took it when they needed it and Lily, for the most part, didn't get in the way. Lily could tell Remus had cried a few times, one night when he came over, by her request, his eyes had been reddened and he had looked exhausted. Sirius on the other hand had decided to push all emotions away, from what Lily could tell. Sirius struggled through the first weeks but had finally gained control over his emotions and seemed determined not to lose that control ever again. He threw himself into caring for Harry so much so that between Remus and Sirius, Lily had barely needed to even ask for help. Both always around anyways. Either way, it was clear that both were in the same shock Lily found herself in. Neither of the two had questioned Lily or pressed her to express her loss, they both seemed to understand that Lily was working through it on her own and it wasn't something they could force. So they didn't.

The days after the funeral went fast, like a blur. Years passed by, and she like Sirius, began focusing solely on Harry's well being. After the first few years, Sirius had begun to put space between himself and Lily, though she never understood why. Both Remus and him still watched Harry or did pick-up from the local muggle school he attended, however the only times the three were together was because of Harry. Lily had often thought that loss caused people to either become unnervingly close or uncomfortably distant, and by that logic it seemed their group had done the latter. Every wednesday and sunday, the four would pile around the table for a family dinner but Lily begun to fear that even that was for Harry's sake alone. Lily knew Sirius and Remus thought this distance between them was solely on her, both blatantly saying as much to her through the years. She'd "pushed them away," as they'd say. Lily knew it just seemed like that because despite all James' efforts to make her part of his friend group, Lily would always be James' wife to them. Sure they were family, but Lily wasn't sure if they were still, or had ever really been, friends. They were there under a feeling of obligation rather than desire, Lily dismayed. And with no James to force her upon them, their relationships had fallen apart. Knowing that she had always been closer with Remus than any of James' other friends, it was heartbreaking that even that relationship was dissolving. Both men had practically lived with Lily for the first four years after the incident, however Remus had been the first pull away and Sirius followed his lead not too long after. Of course, Harry hadn't adjusted well to this and would often stay nights with either of his uncles. Harry would complain how he missed them until Lily gave into his requests to spend the night at one of the two others' homes.

Harry was a quiet boy and secretly Lily worried that his shyness often wasn't healthy. He was polite and kind, but the only people he plainly wanted to see were his uncles. Or, Lily supposed, "Uncles". Harry was unsure of himself, this Lily knew. Even his desire to see his mother seemed forced. Lily would make a point to carve out time to spend with him, just to have Harry say he'd prefer to spend time with his uncles. He wouldn't say it so boldly, but his constant suggestions to invite his uncles over were a clear implication that he'd rather have them there than her. This pressed on her chest heavily, knowing that her son, all she had left, didn't reciprocate the level of love she felt for him. That her only child didn't want to spend time with her.

When he had been young it had been different, their time together was constant–whether Sirius or Remus were there or not. She figured it had changed when Harry had turned five, as that was when she'd returned to her career. Simply finding the odd job here and there before, Lily had been too overwhelmed with Harry and caring for him to focus on schooling and career choices. But when he'd turned five, she had decided it was time. Harry was old enough to know she was there for him, despite his obvious preference for his uncles. Her relationship with him was strained to say the least. Lily trying constantly to be enough for Harry, Harry pulled further and further away with time. Lily had to be everything for him, though. She knew how naive that seemed, but what mother didn't want to give their child everything they could offer? There was no other option for her, nor did she want there to be.

Lily knew it would've been one hundred percent worse without having Sirius and Remus around, put aside all her complaints about the men, she had to love them. She had to be grateful. They'd given her the support, whether in regards to her career choices into healing after being a herbologist; or with choices involving Harry. Though Lily Potter had many things she could complain about, she also knew she had a greater amount of things to be grateful for. Harry and her had survived being hunted by the most feared wizard in the world, she had a relationship with her son (however strained it was), she had friends, she had Sirius and Remus and a career. She had a reasonably normal life. What more could she expect? What more could she want? Of course she didn't know, there was something much more in store. Someone.

 **A/N:** Okay, so originally I just wrote the first chapter and then I decided if I'm going to post this I should write this little conclusion chapter. Now, I might continue it but haven't decided, so we'll see, but I wanted to leave you all with some closure that in this scenario of Lily having survived, she and Severus would eventually get together. Reviews are welcome and appreciated. Yep, that's all :)


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

1989

His eyes boring into the paper before him, Severus Snape scowled. Yet another mediocre paper. Were these children even listening to his lessons? Apparently not. Scribbling down another sub-par grade, Severus sighed heavily. Exhausted of reading such raw material, he leaned back in his chair. Looking around the office, papers pushed aside, Severus let his eyes watch the entrance door across the room. The shadows of students passing behind the door every now and then flickered the lighting within his own dimmed office.

Although Severus had vowed, and for the most part lived by that vow, to hate every second within the cold stone walls of Hogwarts, the place itself had grown on him. The familiarity to the building was nice at times. No children around, he could think clearly in his office. The office was unpersonalized, standard. The books around the only hint to who inhabited the space. It was refreshing, having somewhere to go where there was no distractions or obstacles. Just Severus and his books, his potions and ingredients only meters away.

Looking to the clock, Severus noted it was almost 7:24 AM. He'd been up almost an hour and a half and still hadn't stopped by the Great Hall for breakfast. Considering having a house elf bring him food, Severus finally stood. Forcing himself to leave the office, Severus decided against eating alone. He liked the building but by no means did he enjoy the loudness of children, especially at such hours. Walking through the long corridors, Severus breathed in the fresh air. The consistent flow of cool air through the building was another pro to the place Severus spent most days at. Admittedly, it could hardly be considered a relevant "pro", as it made such a little impact on his days.

The Great Hall was loud, as predicted. Walking towards the staff table, Severus was almost knocked to the floor by a stumbling child. Steadying his own balance and half catching the boy, Severus sneered. Henry Allen, Ravenclaw. Allen quickly composing himself and straightening up, piped, "So sorry, Professor," as he threw a nervous glance towards his friends who watched from behind. Glowering down his nose to the boy, the boy shrunk back. "Watch what you're doing, Allen, won't you?," Severus said irritatedly.

"Y-yes, Sir."

Giving the boy a last glance, Severus continued toward the front table. He didn't see a point in lecturing the boy, they never learnt until they just did. Henry Allen was only a first year and, although Severus would never admit it, he saw actual potential in the boy. Not only with potion making but with academics in general. Severus could tell the boy would go far and saw no reason to snap at him for his childish acts at the age of only eleven. Yes, Severus could be compassionate–and yes–it was pathetic. His position within the school obviously must be making him soft, Severus mused, making a mental note to berate the Headmaster later about that. This caused a small smirk to flicker upon his lips.

Taking a seat between Dumbledore and Flitwick as he reached the staff table, Dumbledore said brightly, "Morning, Severus." Flitwick followed suit and gave a polite greeting, both to which Severus replied accordingly. Breakfast was a quick affair, making it through the meal without another word directed at him, Severus' morning was off to a decent start. Beginning to rise from his seat, it was then Dumbledore said, "Severus?" Holding back an eye roll, Severus just knew the man had waited to speak until Severus was about to leave for dramatic effect. As expected, the older wizard had piqued their colleagues' attention, a few glanced towards them, others just perked up their ears. Looking down to the older man, Dumbledore's sparkling blue eyes told him enough. The man needed something. As it always seemed he did.

"Yes?"

"I was hoping we could talk later today, shall we say noon?, my office?" Holding Dumbledore's gaze for a pause, Severus gave a small nod. No point in arguing or explaining that he had other plans that didn't involve serving the older Wizard. Severus still needed to restock the fluxweed, knotgrass and agrippa before the fifth years' potions class, which meant a trip to Diagon Alley. That would have to wait, now. But that was the deal, Dumbledore gave the orders and Severus did as told. Severus made no mistake in the request either, it was mandatory. Eight years since the war had officially ended and Severus was in the same damned position. Everyone else had moved on and Severus was still working at Hogwarts, still teaching. But that's how life was, Severus could serve ten life times and it wouldn't rid him of the guilt he felt for what he'd done.

No, he deserved this. Feeling as his guilt resurface, Severus internally groaned. How many days had he spent with this feeling?, of knowing what he'd caused Lily? of what he'd caused so many more? All the lives he'd taken, all the lives he'd changed for the worse. Lily, alone,was an entirely different issue at hand. He couldn't handle the guilt of all he'd caused, so Severus pushed it down. Granted, Lily was an issue so suppressed in him, there was no use in stressing over it. However, that didn't stop Severus from doing so. Severus hadn't seen the woman in at least four years and their last encounter had been anything from pleasant for Severus, although he was sure it hadn't bothered Lily a bit, why should it? They weren't friends, she hardly even knew him now. It was a passing of acquaintances.

Severus' main priority would always be serving for his mistakes, and he paid each day to that cause but he'd also changed in the years since the night the Dark Lord had fallen. In each day from then and now. Severus considered himself more mature, less childish. Older with a better sense of reality. And not nearly as careless as before. He didn't wander aimlessly anymore, he wasn't a puppet like he'd been before. He served, yes, but he was respected now. Dumbledore respected him, Dumbledore trusted him. Or as much as Dumbledore would trust anyone. Dumbledore had changed Severus' life, for the better. That, Severus was sure of. When all was said and done, Severus was okay with his choices since the war had ended. He was okay with his position. He was okay with being at odds with Lily as long as she remained safe.

Knocking on the office door, Severus waited for the familiar voice, "Come in." Pushing the door open, Severus stopped for a moment, surprised to find himself faced with not only Dumbledore, but Cornelius Fudge as well. Stepping into the room, the door shut with a muted thud. "Ah, Severus," Dumbledore smiled, looking up from his desk where he leaned over some scattered papers. Fudge who sat opposite Dumbledore made to stand but Dumbledore quickly made a sitting motion to the Minister.

"Dumbledore, it's quite al-"

"Nonsense, Minister." And the Minister's feeble attempts to stand were put to rest. Coming into the room a little further, Severus said evenly, "Minister," giving a small nod of respect before facing Dumbledore. "Cornelius and I were just talking about our plans for over the summer vacation," Dumbledore shared, his eyes still skimming the papers in front of him. "How…exciting," Severus said, his sarcasm causing a chuckle from the Minister of Magic. "I thought you'd say that!" Dumbledore said brightly, looking up to Fudge and Severus briefly. "Did you?" Severus questioned, unconvinced. "Mhmm…" Dumbledore murmured, looking down to his papers for another second. Glancing at Fudge, Severus noticed he looked a little annoyed at Dumbledore. Oh, how Dumbledore brought out the best of people. "Headmaster?, is there a reason I'm here?"

"Like I said, Cornelius and I were just talking-"

"About summer, yes. I heard," Severus interrupted shortly, at his words the older man looked up to Severus amusedly. "Bad morning?" Dumbledore asked, the Minister fidgeted a little in his seat. "Not at all. On the contrary, it was fine until I was summoned and then forced to partake in small talk," Severus retorted. Another moment of shuffling through papers, Dumbledore straightened up. "I'm sorry to hear that, Severus."

"As am I," Severus agreed. Severus locked gaze with the Headmaster as he continued, "As you know, come the end of this month, the new auror's will begin their final training and be dispatched in fall,"

"Yes," Severus nodded as Dumbledore waited for him to make some motion of understanding before continuing, "Cornelius has brought it to my attention that many are, shall we say, lacking, potion making skills,"

"That's an understatement," Cornelius scoffed.

"Am I to understand, my teachings have been an-"

"No, no. It has nothing to do with your teachings," Cornelius said airily with a dismissive hand. Nodding slowly, Severus looked back to Dumbledore, not quite understanding the others' point and a little offended now. "As you, of all people, understand, potion-brewing is a complex and many layered skill," Dumbledore began again, "One of which repeats nearly never, as each potion is different and yet the same."

"And?" Severus pressed, raising an eyebrow. "Healing is a great part of being an auror and with healing comes potion-brewing, ingredient recognition," Fudge began. "And you expect me to be able to help, how?" Severus prompted, keeping his tone in-check as he spoke to the Minister of Magic. Fudge shifting, he stood and leaned against Dumbledore's desk, so that he faced Severus as he said, "Dumbledore believes you'd be, um, fit for a new position within the auror program."

"Is that so…." Severus drew out, looking to Dumbledore over the Minister's shoulder. "All you'd have to do, is help with identifying and brewing more complex potions, ones above the common aurors' knowledge. There will be one other Potions Master to accompany you as well as two healers to help with more medically structured potions."

"You'd be leading the team, Severus," Dumbledore added, with a knowing smile. Severus looked between the two men as he asked, "And what about when school resumes?"

"You'd be there just to get the program started, you'll be back to teaching by fall, no worries there," Fudge answered, giving Severus a smile. He apparently didn't hear the disdain in Severus' voice when he spoke of teaching.

"And what would happen after I leave said program?"

"It'd continue on, we want you to begin it as you have more knowledge on both subjects at hand, the Dark Arts and Potion-brewing," Dumbledore explained while Fudge looked away briefly in discomfort. Hesitating, Severus wondered if Fudge knew about Severus' position, and answering for him, Dumbledore added, "From your deep studies in the subject as a child and position now as Potions Master..." Nodding, Severus thought about the offer being laid before him. "Would I be teaching these….other people on the team? What would their knowledge be? Who would they be?" Severus asked, the seriousness of Severus' tone bringing a laugh to Fudge and Dumbledore.

"Both would be highly sufficient in their fields. We've considered Chase Lightwood and Holden Randell for your opposite," Dumbledore said calmly, as if he already knew Severus' answer, which Severus realized he probably did. Severus had told Dumbledore countless times how he wanted to be doing more, how his time at Hogwarts was insulting to his ambitions and knowledge. After so much ranting, and having a position like such practically handed to him, the answer seemed obvious. "As for the healers, they'd be greatly skilled but as to whom they would be, that is still undetermined," Dumbledore said further.

He would be out of Hogwarts, working with people who actually knew what they were doing and not imbecilic children, plus he'd be pushing his boundaries undoubtedly if it was concerning the Dark Arts. But it would be temperate…..how was he expected to be given such an opportunity and then walk away…..back to teaching…..Suddenly realizing that Dumbledore was trying to catch his gaze, Severus met Albus Dumbledore's eyes. Dumbledore wanted him to do this, why Severus wasn't sure. Surely it was just another part of Dumbledore's elaborate plan to knit the world back together by defeating a wizard who was already supposedly defeated. He was tempted to decline the offer right there, just to spite Fudge. Fudge who'd put him through hell with publicized trials. But Severus wanted to do this and spite was for the foolish. Finally giving another slight nod, Severus said, "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay." And that was that. "Good, good…that's good," Fudge nodded thoughtfully as if he couldn't decide if it really was good. "It's excellent!" Dumbledore said chirpily. "You'll begin the 18th of June," Fudge said formally, standing and giving Severus a wobbly hand shake. Not replying with a verbal response, Severus only nodded again. The Minister seemed reluctant but offered another smile before leaving Severus and Dumbledore alone. "Safe travels, Cornelius," Dumbledore offered just as the door began to shut. Fudge didn't appear to hear the farewell or chose not to as he didn't reply before the door closed. "Is that all, Dumbledore?" Severus asked, ready to leave. He didn't have much time left before his first class and still needed to go to Diagon Alley. "For the time being, I think so, yes…." Dumbledore trailed distractedly as his eyes had drifted back to the papers under his nose. Half wanting to ask the other wizard what could be so interesting, Severus knew he didn't have much time to waste so turned without question and left.

 **A/N:** I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter!, it took me forever to edit ergo the long stall but here it is, hope it's alright…


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

 **A/N:** Hey all, so I'm going to try and give you more consistent updates and I'm sorry for the long lags between all my updates, life's just super busy and such. Um, this chapter was rather hard to write, not sure why, but it's also necessary for the story so if it's just as hard to read as it was to write, please get through it 'cause from here on the story should go up hill!

Flipping through the papers before her, Lily scribbled little notes here and there. Two months on the case and she'd made little to no progress. Looking across the room to the woman in the bed, comatosed, Lily exhaled sharply. She couldn't imagine how awful it'd be to be so broken and have no one there by her side. Sirius and Remus, and of course Harry, would've been by her side in an instant. As of yet, no one had claimed or identified the woman, so she remained an anonymous patient. Brought in by aurors after being found in an alley alone, unconscious, Lily had no leads to the cause of the woman's illness and had taken every precaution and measurement she could think of, but sadly nothing seemed to work. Even Healer Sinclair had not been able to do much more, only having been able to save the woman's physical form, the woman's mental state remained unchanged since her arrival.

Lily gathering her papers and shuffling them into a nice stack, she stood. Paper stack in arms, she gave the room a once-over before closing the door behind herself. Down the crowded corridors of St. Mungo's, Lily went for her office, needing to check some paperwork before heading out for the day. "Potter!" Someone called out abruptly, causing Lily to jump, startled. An elegant looking woman with dark curls and a sharp jaw line was waving Lily down from behind. Relaxing as she recognized the woman as her executive, Lily waited for the woman to reach her, smiling politely, "Healer Sinclair."

"I'm glad I caught you, has there been any improvement in the comatosed woman?" Sinclair asked promptly. Shaking her head, Lily pressed her lips together, unsated. "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that…" Sinclair sighed, tilting her head in disappointment. Lily nodded in agreement, Sinclair continued, "I received a letter this morning, from the Ministry, in regards to the woman. That's why I ask."

"What did they want?" Lily asked confusedly, unsure why the Ministry would be concerned with any of their cases. "Since the aurors brought her in and she hasn't been identified, after three months she becomes the Ministry's responsibility," Sinclair explained, "Which is why I've decided to make this case a priority. As such, I'm hoping you'll be able to help me out?..."

"Of course," Lily said, giving Sinclair a curious look. "I need you to get five to six ounces of moly, a minimum amount of doxy venom-"

"Doxy venom?, why?."

"I'll explain tomorrow, we'll also need some foxglove."

"Okay, I'll make a stop into Diagon Alley before tomorrow," Lily said giving a small nod, her eyes flickering towards the papers in her arms. Sinclair seeing this, gave a small smile, "Well, I'll let you get back to your day. Shall we say 6:00 tomorrow morning in room 130?"

"See you then," Lily confirmed, the two parting ways as Lily resumed towards her office, Sinclair moved in the opposite direction. Taking out her wand as she reached the door titled, "Lily Potter," the door swooshed open at her command, her paper stacks tumbling down in a heap onto the desk within as Lily fell into the chair with a groan. It'd been a long day, despite the fact that it was not even noon, and the thought of going to Diagon Alley sounded far from enjoyable. Having been up since four, her eyes were heavy and she still had to pick up Harry as well as now go to Diagon Alley. Although Lily wasn't prone to complaining, this day felt particularly draining. She was used to night shifts, night shifts being the only way she'd managed to begin and continue a career all the while being there for Harry's big milestones. It was more the day that seemed to be draining her, the weather rainy and dark, Lily sorted through the papers before her. Signing off on release forms and order forms, it took Lily almost an hour before she managed to get out of the office. Through the lobby and into the rain, Lily held up her wand, a silver strand sprouting from the wand tip and into an umbrella. Tightening her coat as she walked to the street corner, Lily stopped with a twist and disappeared.

Still having a few hours before she needed to pick up Harry, Lily appeared before the Leaky Cauldron, which within had its usual noon crowd. Tom behind the bar like alway, gave Lily a nod, and Lily smiled and nodded back before making her way to the back of the darkened tavern. Through the back door and faced with the brick wall, Lily brought her wand out again, tapping it strategically. The wall opening up just as impressively as it had the first time Lily had entered Diagon Alley, she smiled softly, entering once more into the familiar street. Even with the rain pouring down and clouds gloomy, Lily found comfort in the place. The streets less crowded than usual, presumingly due to the rain which was causing people to take cover within the shops. Making a bee-line towards Flourish and Blotts, Lily ducked her head as she walked hastily towards the brightly lit shop. The smell of fresh paper and wood wafting throughout the store, Lily had spent enough time in the shop to know exactly where to go. Bold signs hanging above each of the aisles, Lily took no time in finding "Jinxes for the Jinxed", "The Dark Arts Outsmarted," and a variety of other books she'd originally overlooked in her pursuits to finding a cure for the unidentified patient at St. Mungos. Having first assumed that such books would be to simplistic for the case, at this point Lily was desperate to find a cure, or even just a cause, and knew no harm could come out of skimming the books she'd first thought to overlook. Stepping into the long checkout queue, Lily's arms were stacked with books. Giving the woman in front of her a sheepish smile as the older woman glanced back and spotted the many books in Lily's arms, the woman gave a laugh before looking forward again. Making it to the checkout desk without dropping any of the books, a sigh of relief escaped Lily as the clerk put the pile of books into a bag, the clerk giving her an understanding laugh in response. Making sure the books wouldn't get wet with a quick tap of her wand, Lily was out the door and back in the rain.

Realizing halfway through her way towards Apothecary that she still needed to go to Madam Malkin's, Lily made a snap second decision, U-turning back towards Madam Malkin's quiet shop. Figuring it was time to buy a new formal gown as she'd worn the same gown to the last three work social events, Lily knew if she didn't get it done now she probably never would. Or at least not anytime soon. She also suspected a few of her colleagues had begun to notice this and had a feeling she wouldn't be able to get through another event without somebody commenting. Into the shop, Madam Malkin gave her usual kind greeting to which Lily smiled in return. However, thirty minutes later, Lily found herself annoyed. Knowing she still had to buy the ingredients Sinclair had requested and needed to pick up Harry, Lily had originally assumed this would be a quick stop. Sighing heavily, her usual chipper demeanor had begun to drain somewhat in between when she'd arrived and now as she stood hopelessly in front of the racks and displays of gowns. It wasn't until Madam Malkin came out from the back of the store with a long green dress, the gown looking perfect in all aspects, that Lily let a small smile appear again. Ten minutes of pinning and hemming, Lily found herself mentally checking off the errand as she left the shop. Checking her watch subconsciously before ducking back into the rain, Lily headed in the direction of the last shop she needed to visit: Apothecary.

Despite the stores usual reputation for being dark and dingy, compared to the outdoors the shop offered warmth and light. People crowded by the entrance, Lily could hear as groups argued over their next stop, none wanting to head out into the rain without a plan of where next they'd take shelter. The fumes of brewing potion samples and opened ingredientes hitting her hard, Lily scrunched her nose in resistance. Maneuvering her way through the crowds, Lily made her way towards the shelves lining the store walls. Tracing her finger as she moved down the rows of different products, voices echoed around her in the condensed space. Finding the moly and foxglove easily, Lily crouched down as her eyes searched for the doxy venom. Beginning to worry it was no longer in stock, Lily began to look for some sort of assistance. A young witch, maybe twenty, with bright blue hair and dark eyes, stood talking to an older wizard near the front. Moving past two sets of parents with their children and an old witch fumbling with her shopping list, to meet the assistance helper, Lily did her best to stay clear of the sample cauldrons scattered about the shop. Making it to the witch, Lily waited patiently, listening as two young witches gossiped about another witch, "I heard she's back–Without him!" The woman who said this said it as if it was the craziest thing she'd ever heard. Bells ringing as the door opened, someone new entered the shop, Lily glanced towards the sound before taking a fast double take. A man had entered. His eyes dark, he wore robes of black. Severus Snape. Scanning the shop, similarly to how Lily had, it was clear he hadn't expected it to be as busy as it was, funny enough his expression showed this much but not much more. Lily looking away uncomfortably, the witch who she'd been waiting to speak with had begun to walk away, "I–Uh, excuse me?" Lily heard herself say, harsher than she'd anticipated, she added apologetically, "Sorry, um, I was hoping you could help me?" as the witch looked at her in acknowledgement. Another glance towards the entrance, he was gone. Clearing her throat, Lily continued in explanation to the witch before her. The witch lead her back towards where she'd been searching, the witch who wore a nametag writing "Liz," said "Usually it'd be back here, so I'm just going to…"

"Right. Well, uh, like I said, I couldn't seem to find it there..." The witch gave a small, unconcerned "Mhhm," in reply and Lily exhaled deeply. Not wanting to be rude, she entertained the witch and followed her back to the same spot she'd previously been searching. Looking around herself as the witch searched the shelves, it took Lily a moment to relocate Snape. His hair, black as well, hung like curtains around his face. From the angle at which she stood, Lily couldn't see his expression, but he appeared to be examining something within the jar in his hand.

Lily had spotted Severus Snape time to time throughout the years, hearing about him in the trials after the war, or spotting him on her various trips to Diagon Alley. One time even, Harry had been with Lily and had supposedly seen Snape looking their way. Lily had figured this was just Harry taking fascination in those around him, as he'd been so young at the time, hadn't thought much else about it. She doubted Snape had even noticed them, having looked pretty intent to find whatever it was he needed when Lily had snuck a glance his way. Later, she had wondered though if he had seen them but had also quickly dismissed the idea, what would it matter if he had? As Lily saw it, Severus, or now she supposed "Snape," had made it clear he had no interest in her life and had no reason to be interested in her life. Yes, they'd been best friends–at one point–but now? Now? They were nothing. Mere acquaintances–if even. So did it matter truly, no. Would she have liked to at least get back in touch, truthfully, yes. After everything that had happened with James, and all the chaos of the war though, it seemed unrealistic. And now, of course, it was too late. Every once in awhile though, she'd wonder about him. She had considered reaching out, just to be friendly. To know what he was like now, what his life was like. After all, at one point, he'd played such an important part in her life. But then she would think of Harry and then James and it felt wrong to rekindle that acquaintanceship after all the accusations made about Snape and the war. Besides, in the end Lily found it far easier not to think about Severus Snape or the past. After all "what-ifs" and hypotheticals never did anyone good.

Realizing she'd been staring, Lily looked back to the witch, Liz, who seemed determined to find something that clearly wasn't there. Lily gave another curious glance towards Snape, however this time she was shocked to find his eyes on her. Unlike her though, Snape met her gaze, paused only a split second and then nodded politely before resuming his search through the shelves of products. Liz finally standing, said, "I'm not seeing it here, so I'll go in the back and see what I can find for you, 'Mam." Nodding, Lily did her best not to roll her eyes at the woman's incompetence. Crossing her arms decidingly, Lily tried to look anywhere but towards Snape as she waited. However, His polite gesture made her even more curious about the man she used to know. Liz returned some minutes after and Lily was glad to finally be able to leave the shop. She already knew she'd be late to pick up Harry and all thoughts of Severus Snape left her mind as she exited the shop, not looking back. Because of this, Lily missed the second glance Severus Snape threw her way as she left, Severus Snape catching only a seconds long flash of her flaming red hair before she was gone once more.

 **A/N:** As always thanks for reading and I'd love to know what you all think so far of the story?


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

 **A/N:** Hello lovelies, thanks for all the comments on the last chapter, it's always great to know what people are thinking and all the comments were so kind, so thank you. As for this next chapter, and all upcoming after, I'm just really excited. The story plot is just really falling into place, so with that said, enjoy!

Gliding into the dark dungeons, Severus was greeted with the low murmurs of first years beginning to collect around the entrance door. The crowd parting at his arrival, Severus swept into the room without a word and the children filed in closely after. Looking over his desk briefly upon entrance, Severus waited until the room was dead silent before he proceeded to approach the class. Stepping forward, Severus surveyed the class, his expression blank. Silence.

"I expect to have two vials on my desk by the end of the period, one filled of _Forgetfulness Potion_ and the other of _Cure For Boils_ ; both labeled as such _._ Begin."

A small lag followed his instructions, their expressions wide and vacant, and then all at once, the chairs scraped back. The class scrambled to grab the best of the ingredients present. The table along the side of the room provided with all the ingredients needed, Severus turned to his desk once more. Taking attendance once the class settled into the prepping-phase of their first potions, a tall stack of papers stood to Severus' right: the essays on Asphodel he'd been grading the morning before, finished and graded.

 _Asphodel._ Lily.

His mind lingering for only a moment on the topic after the previous day's encounter, Severus restlessly looked back to the paperwork before him–application papers for the Auror Aid subdivision project. It seemed since his encounter the previous day, thoughts of the red-headed witch were constantly drifting to mind, causing Severus to be torn between concentration and _her_. Although, as it was, Severus had learned early on in life to focus on the present rather than the past. The sentiments or emotions of the past useless, he'd found it profoundly more realistic to wholly live in the now rather than the what-was' or could-be's. And yet…he was tempted. No. Concentrating in on the application papers, Severus glanced up to the low voices of the class distractedly. Abruptly standing with a short exhale, Severus began to circle the room. Every now and then he'd stop as he examined the brewing potions, and occasionally an unimpressed sneer slipped across his lips while the students cowered under his intense supervision. Although there were many potions that were greatly insufficient, Severus remained silent. Having given extremely in-depth overviews of all the potions not to mention of each individual ingredient in the weeks before, he'd truthfully expected better results than what the class was displaying. A predictable few surpassed his already low standards and blotched their's beyond recognition while an even lower amount exceeded his set prenotions (all of which were Slytherins). Finishing a lap around the room, Severus went back to his desk in finality, not giving the students another indication of disapproval or approval for the remaining time. The Gryffindor and Slytherin first years leaving within the next hour, they left with their hair frizzed from the heat and exhausted looks written on their faces.

The day continued uneventfully and fifteen minutes past one, Severus strolled into the great hall for lunch. Taskless and hungry, it seemed the obvious choice. The weight of final exams approaching showed within the school as the Great Hall, to Severus' liking, was quieter than usual. Taking his usual place at the front table, Severus gave what could only be considered as a _kind_ nod towards Minerva McGonagall, and Minerva returned the gesture equally. "Tell us, Severus, do you _try_ to wear the students out before the rest of us have them, or is it merely by chance?" Her tone was even as she gave him a glance. Not raising his gaze from the platters before them all as he served himself, Severus replied casually, "I don't know what you're referring to?" Minerva's lips twitching up, she gave an unconvinced, "Mmm, I am sure." Filius Flitwick, of whom Severus had always found reasonably interesting, gave a small laugh as he chimed in, "I don't think I've seen the first years this quiet all semester!" Severus looking up, he gave a small nod, not openly smiling and yet, the message was clear and his expression was eased.

If anyone had suggested in his first days as a professor that Minerva McGonagall would one day become one of Severus' closest allies whilst at Hogwarts, he most definitely would've suggested that they were cracked. Not because he had anything against the woman or disliked her, but because he, Severus Snape, didn't have allies. Ever. Since day one, that's how it had been. Even in his schooling days, Lily had been his only friend _and_ ally. That's not to say Severus didn't have _friends_ (a word that had no meaning to him) that he was acquainted with and polite to, but an ally? Friends were easy but allies were always rare. And there was a difference between the two, make no mistake. Minerva, she was an ally. Since he'd begun teaching at the school, to his surprise, she'd become someone he not only tolerated but liked– _for the most par_ t. Her straight forward demeanor and rules of order initially made her one of the first professors Severus had based his own teaching methods on (however roughly) and in the years since, she'd proven to be a stable companion to talk with and enjoy the little social constructs that come with working alongside each other. Pomona Sprout, even more surprisingly, had become another figure around that Severus took tolerance with, though much less so than Minerva and Filius. Pomona Sprout could be just as annoying as she could be tolerant, in Severus' experienced opinion. In fact, originally having tactfully avoided her, it was only because of Minerva and Filius' long history with Pomona that forced Severus to recognize that she could, occasionally, be more than tolerable.

All the voices around quiet, the students talked with little energy which left the vast Great Hall virtually bare. The only ones making anything more than a mumble were the professors and seventh years, who seemed to be rejoicing in their final exams before leaving the school for good. The sound of silverware hitting plates and bowls taking over the space, it seemed to be an unspoken rule that Severus participated in polite small talk before falling silent for the remainder of the meal and no one around questioned it. Little comments here and there, it wasn't long until Severus was out of the great hall and back to the dungeons. Teaching his next class, fifth years, the class was just as uneventful as the previous ones. So much so, by the end of the day, Severus found himself longing for the school year to end, if not just to be able to work on more intellectually challenging material as promised in the new upcoming position. Although Severus was indeed set in his schedule and ways, the idea of doing more–of doing substantial work–sounded refreshing.

In the years since Severus had returned to Hogwarts, it was no shock that much had changed, some things more obvious than others. In many ways, Severus had grown as a person, to a degree in some aspects that not even he could deny. Nonetheless, the position as a professor left Severus just as confined as he'd been as a student. Nonetheless, Severus continued his role as professor due to its vital importance as double-spy and for when the Dark Lord returned, both which he and Dumbledore knew were inevitable. However, despite his dedication as double-spy, in the years that followed after the Dark Lord's fall, Severus had distanced himself from the role. Severus had done his best to move past that part of his life, in hopes of amends for his wrongdoings. Either way, Severus was no longer that boy who simply followed. No, he'd made sure to get rid of that boy long ago. In the years since the deal with Dumbledore was struck, much had changed for the better. No longer only a servant for Dumbledore to order about, somewhere along the way, the two men had formed a respectable relationship. And regardless of all the faults within the two men's relationship, it firmly remained respectable and loyal. Severus was no longer a follower, in fact when needed, he was a leader. Time and time again proving himself to the older man, eventually, Severus' dedication had paid off. As to the others in the castle, Severus wasn't exactly sure what Dumbledore had said to their colleagues to make them accept his place in the school. After the public trials, he'd assumed, with reason, that his place in the castle would be singularly solitary–as his place in life always had been. And it had been solitary, for awhile. But as time went on, whether the other staff members slowly forgot about the trials or simply decided Dumbledore had acceptable reasons for supporting Severus in the trials, slowly Severus had faded into the regular staff crowd. That's not to say Severus was "friendly" per se, because by no means was he. Not joining in on conversations most of the time, Severus opted to join staff room discussions scarcely, but when he did, they listened. It wasn't as if he was suddenly an open and sharing person, no. He was just comfortable. He was him. Still disliking a good quarter of the staff, Severus chose very few people to talk with outside of staff meetings or meals, Minerva one of the few exceptions. She wasn't loud, which in all honesty really had initially been the key factor for him putting up with her. It hadn't been until a while after that he'd realized he didn't dislike her, even growing to eventually like her as a colleague.

Finishing off the application before him, Severus leaned back, his mind thinking of a million different things. One of which was of Lily. Allowing himself for the first time that day to consider the the topic, Severus wondered about the witch. It wasn't often Severus thought about her, the only time she came up being when he and Dumbledore discussed her son, Harry Potter, he'd never had a reason to ponder about her. So much had happened since the night he found her body unconscious on the floor below her son's crib, Severus truly didn't know what to think of her anymore. He wondered a lot, but knew nothing; at least when it came to Lily Potter. And the encounter at Apothecary had been so brief, Severus still wasn't sure what to think of it. At least it had been civil, he supposed. He was never sure what to expect from her, especially considering the Death Eaters trials. Far much more media covering his particular trial than he'd expected, he could never tell how much the public knew. And then there was the other thing: She'd been right. For all her accusations and all his excuses, she'd been right. He'd become one of them...Did she know? Swallowing dryly, Severus looked to the clock, half past twelve. Standing tiredly, Severus pushed all the questions regarding Lily Potter aside for the thousandth time it felt, heading out of the classroom and into the corridors towards his sleeping quarters, Severus put all thoughts of the witch away for the night in hopes of getting a rare night's rest.

 **A/N:** NOTE–As of the next two months or so, updates will primarily be uploaded every seven days. This chapter, as we're still in the beginning of the story, was more or less just another one meant to establish where the main story plot is picking up hence its length. Opinions on this chapter? And as always, thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

 **A/N:** Hello once more! Here we have yet another chapter, I know, amazing! Okay, so I think the stories really picking up now, and although people are getting restless for Lily and Severus to begin talking, alas, we have ONE MORE chapter (this one) before the big meet-cute arrives! So please, keep reading! P.S. Note that the story is happening a month before July, so Harry is 8 turning 9 in this time set. Okay, that's all, without further ado, our story continues….

Putting the last touches on the set table, Lily settled down in the nearest chair. Observing her work, the table before her was nicely covered in a beige table cloth while four plates and sets of silverware laid symmetrically upon the table, platters of food placed in the center of it all. Looking at the clock on the farthest wall, Lily exhaled, exhausted from yet another long day. Long, but still good. Waiting maybe five minutes, Lily smiled weakly as she heard the sound of the door opening, straightening from her relaxed posture at the newcomers.

"Mum?! We're home!" Standing, Lily walked through the small house, prompted by her son's voice. Coming against the doorframe, looking into the entrance hall, Lily gave them an affectionate and genuine smile. Watching as the two men accompanying her son stripped off all their wet overcoats and hung them on the near rack, Lily cleared her throat making herself known. Harry smiling widely as he spotted her, he said enthusiastically, "I'm hungry, Mum." Laughing softly, Lily pulled the boy into a hug as he approached her, holding him tight for a second before he pulled out. Harry was an average height for his age, eight years old and full of energy. His hair was just as jet black and wild as his father's was; recently trimmed but not short, and still falling around his face unevenly. And beneath his thick hair? A scar like no other, square on his forehead, and lightning shaped mark. This marked the traumas her son had already suffered, even at his young age–and was a reminder of her deceased husband's last minutes….His, Harry's, eyes were the same emerald green they'd always been, now hidden behind his thin-framed circular glasses. Lily smiled wider, looking at her son lovingly, brushing his hair back as he pulled farther away, making a face of annoyance. Smirking Lily looked to the two men, one with dark black curls, the other with sprawled sandy colored hair. "Sorry we're late," Remus Lupin said, kissing Lily on the cheek as he greeted her, Lily smiled as she replied, "You're not late, no worries." Sirius Black laughed and gave Remus an amicable clap on the back as he said, "Moony always was our group's timekeeper, eh Lil?" Sirius kissed Lily on the other cheek routinely, she said amusedly, walking with them towards the dining room, "Indeed." Harry, who'd gone ahead of them already sat at the table, squirmy in his seat, but all the same, he waited patiently. Or as patiently as an eight year old could. "Come on…" Harry said, drawing out his words. Leaning over the table as Lily, Sirius, and Remus took their own seats around the table, Harry prodded at the food on the platters. "Harry," Lily sighed with a laugh, shaking her head warningly so that he slunk back into his seat, arms crossed. Giving that signature wide smile he always had around Harry, Sirius said, "Tell me how much, okay?" as he picked up a serving spoon in one hand and Harry's plate in the other. Watching closely as Sirius piled on each of the foods, Harry would say, "Good," after each new platter, stating his desired portion for each of the different dishes.

"The food looks great, Lily," Remus observed, looking over the table. Laughing, Lily said warmly, "Thanks, Moony." Lily was not a cook, she never had been nor would be. Making the day to day regulars for her and Harry was easy, but big meals for groups or even for their bi-weekly dinners was more of a struggle. She never knew where to begin or what to make, and candidly didn't have any great skill or passion when it came to cooking. Their dinners always hosted at her and Harry's house, because of, _well_ , Harry, Lily felt a larger deal of responsibility when the task of meals fell on her. Remus, Sirius and Harry helped out most weeks, some weeks even cooking on their own, but sometimes–just sometimes–she'd have to cook all alone–and she really didn't like that.

"So, how was your day, Darling?" Lily said, giving Harry a glance as she spooned baked potatoes onto her own plate. "Great," Sirius answered jokingly, evoking a fit of laughter from Harry. Remus laughed softly as well looking to Lily, Lily rolled her eyes mockingly.

"Uncle Sirius! She was talking to _me_!" Harry exclaimed, grinning ear to ear.

Lily's eyes meeting Harry's, she marveled at the gleam of complete purity in them, even after all he'd been through. Her smile widening, Lily laughed, "Always with the jokes, Padfoot." Harry giggled at this (used to the adults around him using their childhood nicknames with one another), continued, "My day was good! We went to the park after school and then we went to Uncle Sirius' work, and Uncle Remus showed me all around the...the…" Stopping, Harry struggled, pausing as he thought over what he wanted to say then looking to Remus, who smiled and supplied, "Department of Magical Law Enforcement." Nodding, Harry said thoughtfully, "Right. There…."

"Wow," Lily said, looking impressed, with another look towards Remus and Sirius. "Yeah! I saw all of it, Mum! Even where Uncle Sirius works!" Harry said excitedly. "All of it?" Lily asked, a little skeptically. Remus, shrugged in response and said, "Most of it." Nodding, Lily asked further, "Why were you at the Ministry?" Looking between Sirius and Remus this time as she spoke. "I had to check in on some things," Sirius explained, adding, "With the new subdivision being added to the auror program and all." Looking up from her food, Lily raised a brow, "New subdivision?"

Looking up in surprise, Sirius hesitated and said, "You haven't heard?"

"It's all over, they're trying to recruit the very best possible for the positions, apparently." Remus noted. "Mmhm," Sirius agreed before looking to Lily and summarizing, "It's an Aid subdivision meant so that a group of properly trained duelers all with additionally either potion mastery skills or healer training will be at an immediate location in hopes of being more prepared for the injured…. a medical center, of sorts, located within the auror department, for not only helping the victims of auror related missions, but also enhancing the aurors' knowledge and such..."

"Wow," Lily said, her eyes focused on Sirius as he explained the program. "Yeah, it seems to really be a big deal." Sirius shrugged as he said pointedly, "And I mean, I understand they're trying to be best prepared, especially after cases like the one for your comatosed woman at Mungo's, but in the end it really does seem like a waste of talents. For both the aurors being underestimated and the people in this hypothetical subdivision."

"Sounds like you've given this a lot of thought," Remus said casually with a look to Sirius. Sirius shrugged again and answered, "I'm not the only one."

"I think it sounds like a great idea," Lily inputted, not missing Sirius' unenthusiastic exchange with Remus. "What?" Lily laughed, taking another fork full of lettuce from her salad. "Mum," Harry interrupted distantly, rubbing his eyes. Her son's voice quiet, Lily gave him an adoring look, "What, darling?" But Lily could already tell what he was going to say. "I'm tired, can I be excused?" He asked, yawning. Lips pursed, Lily looked over his plate which was mostly finished off. "Bring your dishes to the kitchen–"

"And rinse them off, before I go brush my teeth and go off to bed," Harry recited, apparently not tired enough to roll his eyes. Surveying her son, Harry added apologetically, "Sorry...I'm tired, Mummy…." Sighing, Lily nodded, "I know, sweetheart. Come here," she said gently. Sliding off his seat, Harry smiled tiredly, hugging his mother. Kissing his head, Lily breathed, "I love you, Harry."

"Love you too, Mum!" He said, pulling back with another tired smile, then hugging Remus and Sirius and taking his plate to the kitchen. _Clink clink_ , more silverware moved, more plates shifted. Realizing that she'd been in the middle of a conversation before Harry had interrupted her, Lily said, "What were we saying before?"

"You were saying that you think the Auror Aid subdivision is a good idea?" Remus laughed, raising his eyes curiously. "You disagree?" Lily questioned, surprised by his look of resistance. Shaking his head weakly, Remus countered, "I think that the auror program is already pretty busy, and adding others? It seems like a lot considering aurors are supposed to already be sufficiently trained in those areas."

"But it makes sense too, doesn't it? And really the only medical training auror's have is what?, from their school days?" Lily said, surprised she was the only one seeing the pros to this supposal program. "In a manner, yes." Sirius nodded, "But, speaking from experience, I've encountered few situations where I feel ill prepared and like Remus said, we already have more than enough bodies."

"Well, it's not really about bodies..." Lily said, that childish know-it-all tone creeping into her tone as she spoke, "I think that it's a rather good idea. In fact, I'd even be interested in it…. I still have another year of my apprenticeship, and I'd gain so much experience from a year training in something like that….Just to see, at least." Both Remus and Sirius looked up in sync, wide eyed. Laughing at their expressions, Lily ventured "It's not that crazy of an idea."

"No." Sirius said bluntly. "No?" Lily repeated unsurely. "Just...no." He repeated with a laugh, looking back to his plate which was practically bare. "You don't think I could?!" Lily said, trying not to be insulted. "No, I think you could. Most definitely. I just don't think you should. Help me out, Moony?"

"It does seem unwise to try and pursue something so unstable and unpredictable when you're essentially doing the exact same thing but in a well accredited hospital, in an already highly regarded program…." Remus deduced, evidently having thought it through before speaking. Pausing, Lily said, more to end the conversation than anything else, "Like I said, it was just a thought…."

Sirius and Remus exchanged yet another look as Sirius said, "Lil."

"It's fine," she laughed passively, dismissively waving a hand. "We were just saying–"

"Really, it's fine. Let's just drop it." And they did. No one saying another word on the topic, they chose the odd thing here and there to discuss until their glasses were drained and all the leftovers were put away. Sirius and Remus throwing each other reluctant and skeptical looks throughout the rest of the evening, Lily was rather glad to finally be shutting the door closed with them behind it. Only reminded by the meal how at odds she really was with James' friends.

Checking in on Harry, Lily's chest felt all the much lighter from simply seeing Harry fast asleep in his bed. Layers of blankets over him, Lily was silent as she crept in the room. Kissing his forehead, Lily stayed in the dark room for a break, watching him. Maybe Sirius and Remus were right, she pondered. Was anything worth disrupting and changing the beautiful little boy before her's world?. Doubtful. They all only wanted the best for him after all….But it's not as if it would _really_ change Harry's life….But then again, she hadn't really been considering it. She'd only said that the program had seemed like a good idea–Something to consider. Even so...somewhere within the evening, whether it was in between Remus and Sirius practically telling her she couldn't do it or, more or less telling her what was best for her son, the idea of at least applying really did sound.. _.what?_ She couldn't place the feeling, and yet, Lily was intrigued by it. By the idea….She'd, prospectively, be able to help so many more people, save people quicker... Not to mention it'd be good to be able to learn how to work on her feet….She'd never considered it before, but it made sense? Medicine had been her passion for so long, but hadn't it always been helping others that had been the real appeal in medicine...it didn't matter where she was when she was helping...helping had always been her real passion...Going to sleep, Lily couldn't help but shake the feeling that she _needed_ to be a part of this project. She couldn't place why she needed to be, she jus _t knew_ it. _I'll only apply, just to see_...Lily thought, _What's the worst that could happen after all?…._

 **A/N:** Thanks for reading yet another chapter! I also want to say another thanks for all the comments and feedback! That's all, thanks again!


	7. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

 **A/N:** Hello! I know it'd been FOREVER, but I had some time and thought I'd post this chapter! Hope you enjoy!

Checking his watch as he walked through the vast halls of the Ministry of Magic, the small time-piece read as forty-five minutes late. _Just wonderful_. It really didn't matter if he was late he supposed, after all this was a social event and nothing more. But still, he had hoped to show up on time, if not just to leave all the much earlier. Nevertheless, Severus walked through the opened heavy black doors about fifteen minutes until seven that evening.

Severus' first observation was how empty the grand room looked, even with the countless amount of people within. Compared to the usual crowds of witches and wizards within the building, such a large room looked bare without its usual amount of occupants. All the witches and wizards within chatting, drinking, and laughing, Severus drew in his breath shortly before walking towards the many clumps of people. A few familiar faces giving him nods or greetings in passing, Severus stopped here and there politely for a minute or two before continuing through the crowd. It wasn't until Severus saw a woman only slightly shorter than himself, with dark curls of hair and olive skin, that Severus relaxed however. Coming up beside her, the woman spotted him just as he reached her side. "Severus Snape," she laughed, looking particularly surprised to see him. Severus replied with a nod, "Esmé," as the woman continued, "I didn't know you would be here tonight?" The woman surveyed Severus with amusement as she spoke. After all, this was not his usual scene. Raising a brow, Severus replied, "I could say the same to you." Giving the group she stood with a once-over, Severus recognized most of the faces: Chase Lightwood, Dumbledore, Holden Randell, a man he recognized but had never bothered to learn his name, a woman he believed was named Hanna Clarkson but couldn't be sure, and a few more. Saying an inclusive greeting towards the others, Severus had to restrain himself from rolling his eyes. _Holden Randell–an annoying specimen, if there ever was one_. Just the presence of the man annoyed Severus to the core. "Oh come on?" Esmé Sinclair said with another laugh, "You must've assumed _I_ would be here?" And in truth, when he thought about it, Severus really should've assumed she'd be there. Her speciality was, after all, medicine.

Severus had known Esmé Sinclair for many years by this point, both going through similar training for their careers, both had run into one another enough times through the years that Severus would go far enough the say she was, _perhaps_ , one of his few friends. Though, as she attended Beauxbatons Academy in her schooling days (despite her English roots) they'd never come across one another within Hogwarts. However, they had met briefly in school during the triwizard tournament, which happened in their fifth year. This discovery arose many years after they'd first met, but both were reasonably confident they'd never spoken during those months of cohabitation within the Hogwarts grounds.

"I try not to assume–" Severus began, stopping mid-sentence as another figure said enthusiactically, "Healer Sinclair!" Severus felt as his body go cold. He knew that voice… _._ Esmé gave a look towards the voice, before she smiled and waved the red-head over. Severus' eyes shifted to the new woman as she approached the group. Looking to a woman beside himself as she said informatively towards him, "An apprentice. From St. Mungo's." Lily's eyes spotting Severus as she approached the group, she faltered for only a moment before she said promptly with a smile towards Esmé, "I thought I'd see you here" Lily's eyes gleaming over the rest in the group, just as Severus had done, she looked a little disheveled Severus observed. Smiling back, Esmé said, "I, however, didn't think I'd see you here?..."

"Oh, yes, well..." Lily began, "I just figured since I fit the criteria…I'd check it out." Severus observed how she shrugged unsurely at her own statement, which surprised him. Lily's high held confidence was one thing Severus had assumed would never change about her. Esmé laughed, "That is true." Apparently remembering she wasn't alone, Esmé said, "Well as you're here, let me introduce you to some of the key figures in this program. I assume you already know Dumbledore, and than this is Chase Lightwood, and Holden Randell," Esmé listed, going around the group. Lily smiled and nodded, shaking hands as Esmé introduced new people, greeting others she already knew. It was hard to read much into her behavior, Severus noticed as he stood there, although as to whether this was because he was no longer atoned to her mannerisms or because she was naturally this reserved now, Severus knew not. "And then this here," Esmé said, Severus only than realized Esmé was referring to him, "Is Professor Severus Snape, who currently teaches potions at Hogwarts. Which, if I recall correctly is your alma mater?" Severus who had been doing his utmost best to focus on his drink in hand, glanced up as Lily replied. And, for the first time in years Severus took in Lily's presence fully. She looked the same, he decided, if not perhaps a little older. Her face, which had once been rounded now was chipped which made her cheekbones appear sharper. Her hair remained as he knew it always would, and the polite smile she wore was just as he remembered it was from when she was a child. "Uh, yes. We, um, actually were in the same class..." Lily said weakly, giving Severus a weak nod, looking to him directly for the first time since she'd arrived. Giving a short nod in return, Severus said, "It's been a while."

"It has" Lily said with a weak smile. Studying her presence for only a second longer, Severus gave another uncertain nod before looking around the room as to avoid looking at her any longer. Severus was grateful when Esmé said casually, "Did you really? Wow, small world, huh. So Albus taught you both?", so that neither Lily nor Severus had to say anymore.

"That I did, mind you Esmé," Dumbledore began smiling brightly, "Lily's always been an immensely talented witch, nearly as good as Severus with potions too!" Color rising in Lily's cheeks slightly, clearly embarrassed, Severus simply rolled his eyes. Esmé apparently found this exchange amusing as she said, "Is that so?" her gaze looking expectedly at Severus, she added teasingly, "Do you agree with that Severus? I know how you are with your potions." Looking blankly at Esmé, Severus said carefully, "I wouldn't disagree with that assessment, assuming Mrs. Potter–"

"Lily" Lily interjected kindly, "No need for formalities, it's not as though we're strangers." But they were, Severus thought rather darkly. Severus' gaze glazing over her as he looked to Esmé, Severus continued, "Assuming her skills haven't changed since our days in school." Lily's expression hardened at this comment. She watched him like a puzzle she couldn't solve or a mathematics problem she couldn't read. This was a look Severus was used to getting. "They haven't." Lily said, sounding sure of herself for the first time that evening. Locking gazes with Lily for only a second, Severus wondered if she thought that had been a challenge of some sorts. Her eyes were suddenly fiery and determined. Contemplating this, Severus took another sip of his drink, dragging out the motion to avoid further conversation.

As the conversation continued, Severus remained quiet. Checking his watch, he sighed internally as he realized he needed to wait at least an hour before leaving due to social construct. Standing there, in the group, with Lily across the circle from him, Severus realized how much he didn't know her. She was quieter than he'd remembered, he thought as he caught snippets of what she said. As he recalled, she'd always been a bit on the louder, or "more excited", side. But now, she barely spoke and when she did it seemed shy. Of course, it didn't occur to Severus that this was because she was just as uncomfortable with the situation as he was. Although Severus hadn't been sure how'd he react if he did ever come across Lily again, this wasn't what he had imagined.

How was one supposed to act around a long ago estranged friend? Was there a protocol? Moreso, although Severus found himself curious about the girl, he found himself uncomfortable around her. It was a weird phenomenon, being so cautious around someone he'd once considered his closest (and only) friend. After all, it was virtually like being with a stranger except ten times more strange. Severus didn't know how to stand there and act like everything was normal. Part of him wondered if she thought he was being cold, or cruel. Maybe he was? But what else could be expected of him, Severus wondered.

Eventually Severus managed to drift from the group without drawing too much attention, murmuring some excuse as he left and made his way across the room, he searched for other familiar faces, doing his best to stay occupied. He ran into Gretchen Andersen and Thomas Erickson and for the first time ever Severus was glad to be dragged into a conversation with them. Anything to keep him busy. Unfortunately, he could only listen to Andersen talk for so long before he got annoyed and made a feeble excuse to leave this conversation as well.

He spotted Lily a few times more throughout the evening, but made a point each time to duck the opposite direction as to avoid any more awkwardness. This alone was out of character, Severus didn't consider himself someone who ran from situations, but from this, he mercilessly did so with no shame. And more than once, Severus was sure Lily had seen him turn the opposite direction as they crossed paths. Although he knew it wasn't the case, at times it felt as if Lily was trying to run into him.

Part of Severus found it infuriating. Here he was, surrounded by experts and people of like mind within his field, and he was hiding from Lily. Absurd, truly. Was he not a highly regarded and respected potions master? Had he not been published in several papers about potion brewing and the medical properties of the art? In fact, more than once the Minister of Magic had asked (through Dumbledore) for Severus' help on projects. Tonight, Severus mused dryly was a good example of this. It seemed backwards, Severus deduced, his behaviour that is. It was as if the last 12 years hadn't happened, as if he was back on the Hogwarts grounds, trekking back and forth just to avoid seeing Lily and James. His lips curled into the slightest of sneers at his own sudden degradation, and so Severus was relieved when he finally saw his watch strike eight. Trying not to look too hasty, Severus left the event, only stopping to say farewell to Esmé who to Severus' relief was not longer with Lily.

"Oh, wait. What did you think of her?" Esmé said suddenly, reaching out and stopping Severus as he turned to leave after their farewells. "What?" He asked, although he didn't look confused. "The girl. Lily Potter?" Esmé laughed, "For the program?"

"I'm not sure." Severus said in what he hoped was a careless tone. Nodding, Esmé nodded, "Hmm, well, I think she really has potential. Just something to consider when we choose the applicants." Nodding blankly, Severus said, "Right, okay." Laughing at Severus' indifference, Esmé nodded, "Okay, consider it, Severus. She's good." Giving a short nod, with that, Severus turned and left.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed this chapter! It might take a little for me to get back into the swing of the story but I hope this was a good start. Feedback is always welcomed, and thanks again for reading!


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

 **A/N:** Hello, thanks for the comments and follows, and I hope y'all enjoy this next chapter.

Standing reservedly, Lily closely watched the man across from her. She watched for familiar expressions or movements; she watched to see if she could still spot the little boy she'd known in the man before her–she couldn't. It felt as if she was in a daze, seeing Severus Snape again, talking to him, however briefly. He acted present in the group, the way he'd nod in acknowledgement when Chase Lightwood spoke of his new experiments with gillyweed, or the way he'd lean in with a neutral expression and say something to Esmé that made her laugh. Lily noticed the respectful way everyone would look to Severus when he spoke, a courtesy they didn't provide to everyone. She couldn't place why this all felt so abnormal, but it did. It felt unusual for the Severus she'd known. Trying her best not to stare, Lily forced her gaze to settle on whomever spoke.

More so than she wondered about Severus, however, Lily wondered what Severus thought of her. She wondered how it seemed, seeing Lily after twelve years. It was clear the group around all knew each other well, unlike Lily. Perhaps that's why Severus was so comfortable, he'd done stuff like this numerous times whereas this was Lily's first event like this in she had no clue how many years. Here she was just starting her career and Severus was already respected enough in his field to have been asked to lead the entire project. It felt foolish, but part of Lily was embarrassed that she seemed so behind compared to him. Of course she had excuses for why this was the case, but did he know? Did he care? Maybe he hadn't even given it a second thought. That seemed likely in truth, Severus had never been one to pay attention to others...but here he was, doing just that: paying attention to all the others.

As Lily scouted for members, or potential members, of the program, she caught a few snippets through the crowd of Severus after they parted as he talked with other small groups, or conversed with singular individuals who'd stop him as he passed. In these moments, Lily studied Severus, as much as was allowed without seeming weird, that is. This was not helpful, she knew, for her original goal of the evening however, and because of this, Lily tried to ignore her curiosity. After all, Lily had come that evening not to ponder the life of Severus Snape but to make connections with the people who would potentially be hiring her. Lily then had to remind herself that Severus was indeed one of these people. Eventually she'd have to confront him if she wanted to make a good impression with everyone on the project. Especially as he was the leader of the project, from what she understood. It was because of this reason that she had known he would be here tonight. She'd only found out a few days previously about his position in the program and despite their history, Lily knew she couldn't back out of the program just because of this reason. Nonetheless it was for this reason she'd been nervous about coming in the first place. Lily also hadn't expected to run into him as she had with an audience to watch their first real exchange in years. As the evening drew on, Lily knew she needed to put in a good word for herself to Severus eventually, regardless of any awkwardness between them. Lily assumed or rather hoed that she was already in Healer Sinclair's good books after all the work they'd done together, and made tracking down Chase Lightwood, Holden Randel, and Severus Snape a priority of the night.

Lily wondered more than once that evening why Severus didn't seem as curious about her as she was of him, after all, it wasn't as though her life had been remotely straightforward in the years since they'd parted ways. She knew Severus knew about what had happened to her and Harry, everyone seemed to know about it. And yet, he seemed determined to remain on the opposite side of the room from Lily. Whether or not this was intentional, Lily couldn't tell, though after the fifth time he began moving across the room as she headed in his direction, Lily began to think it wasn't unintentional. Maybe he'd forgotten about her past, Lily wondered. Or maybe he had no reason to care…. But that couldn't be, Lily knew. After all they'd gone through, Lily was still just as curious about him, about his past. Lily wanted to know the truth behind his story, just as he must want to know the truth behind hers.

She'd heard the rumours, that he'd joined You-Know-Who after their school days…. Whether or not Lily believed these rumours, she wasn't sure. It fit his profile back than but the trials….His post-war trials had been widely publicized, a fact Sirius loved to relish. But throughout the trials, never once had there been any sort of confirmation on if he had or hadn't been a Death Eater, instead the papers had focused on the claims of others. Dumbledore's claims…. This had been the hardest evidence to deal with, as Dumbledore had so widely benounced that he stood by Severus. Lily knew Dumbledore would never had done this unless he was absolute about Severus' loyalties but the evidence stacked against them. Claims from former Death Eaters, after the war, providing names in exchange for lesser charges. More than once, Severus' name had been said in these trials, but with no evidence, Severus remained seemingly clean.

"Lily?" She jumped, having been so deep in thought, Lily had forgotten where she was. Dumbledore stood in front of her, his serene smile broad as he greeted her with a chuckle. "Professor Dumbledore! Sorry," she laughed weakly. Lily stood by the beverage display, her mind having wondered, her cup remained empty as she had yet to refill it. Shaking his head, Dumbledore replied, "No, no, I could tell you were in deep thought, I shouldn't have bothered you!"

"No, no, really, interruptions are welcomed," Lily smiled. "What deep thoughts have I broken you away from, dear girl?" Dumbledore mused, curiously, his eyes sparkling. "Oh, nothing really…. How are you? We didn't get to talk much before." Nodding in agreement, Dumbledore said, "I fear that is always the case with these kinds of functions. We never get to talk with those we wish to." Lily wasn't sure why, but Dumbledore's words bothered her. It was as if he was implying something. His piercing blue eyes resting on her, Lily felt the same sensation she always felt around him, as if Dumbledore knew more than he let on about her inner most thoughts–as if he could read her mind. "I suppose, but we're getting to talk now so that can't be all that true" Lily replied evenly, with a weak smile. "Oh, you flatter me!" He laughed, "But I've found it often times it true. Nevertheless, I am doing well, thank you for asking. And how about yourself?"

"I'm–" she could see in her peripheral vision a streak of blackness heading towards the exit. "Sorry," Lily laughed distractedly, re-focussing on Dumbledore as she answered, "I'm good." Worry bubbled in her stomach, watching the black blur in her side vision pass through the crowds towards the exit; was he leaving? Lily checked her watch to find it was only eight. Surely he wasn't, but Lily feared he was. Knowing she'd have no other chance to put in a good word about herself to Severus before the program leaders made their decision, Lily said sympathetically, "I'm–I'm sorry, actually Professor Dumbledore, I have to go catch up with someone. Could we talk later?"

"Of course, dear girl, I wish not to hold you up" Dumbledore nodded, kindly. Giving an earnest smile, Lily said another farewell and then guilt ridden at her rudeness to the man turned on her heels and began to walk away with haste. He couldn't have left yet. Lily knew what she was about to do was desperate, but she was in a desperate situation. The more and more she'd learned about the Auror Aid program, and the more she'd thought about it, Lily had become deeply connected to the idea of joining it so if begging all the leaders of the project was how she would get in, than so be it. She'd prove herself after she got in.

Slipping through the crowds, she could see a glimpse of his black cloak. Pushing by people with urgency, it wasn't until she reached the corridor outside that she caught up with Severus, "Sev-Snape!" She said a little more aggressively than she intended as she reached speaking distance from him. Stumbling over his name as she spoke, Lily realized for the first time that she had no clue how to address the man. He wasn't her equal in the field, but it felt too formal to call him "Snape", let alone "Profesor Snape" which was as Healer Sinclair had introduced him.

Turning to his name and seeing as she approached, Severus gave a glance towards the exit as if considering whether to simply ignore her and leave. Fully facing his body towards her after a split second, as to acknowledge her, Lily was relieved by this gesture. "Sorry," Lily exhaled, as she came to a stop before him, "I just wanted to catch you before you leave." Severus merely raised an eyebrow in question. "I, um, I just wanted to say, as you know, you're leading this project….I just–I don't want to be overlooked for the healer position, I am good. Really." Severus' face remained neutral to this. "I think that I could really help contribute to the program and I know that my experience is less than desirable,"

"It is," he agreed, speaking for the first time in the exchange. Lily paused at this as hesitance creeped into her expression. Was that his way of saying she wasn't cut out for the job? Was he intentionally being rude? Lily couldn't tell, so she continued on, a little less confidently now, "But I am good, _Snape_." Lily's use of his surname a personal dig at him in response to his comment. His lips straight, he kept silent, waiting for her to finish. "Don't overlook me, that's all I'm saying. Healer Sinclair–"

"Has already told me all I need to know about you, Mrs. Potter. We will decide based off of merit and nothing less. Favorables and connections won't do you good here. You shall only be overlooked if your resumé indicates you should be."

"I-" Lily began, but Severus simply looked to her, and Lily knew whatever else she had to say, he wouldn't here it. Her voice catching before she spoke, Lily inhaled sharply and nodded, "Alright, well, thank you for your time." As Lily turned to leave, however, she hesitated; not because she had more to say, but because for a split second, it seemed he did. His lips parted as if to speak, he paused and than broke eye contact and turned, withdrawing down the long hall with purpose so that the ends of his cloak rose and fell lowly.

More than a little disappointed with Severus' comments, Lily felt more put down than she imagined she should. What does his one opinion matter? If the rest felt she was qualified than she'd be safe. And than, as her mind often did, it began to counter her: _Why would they hire her if the head of the program thinks she's unqualified? Clearly people value his opinion and with reason….Maybe he had a point._

It took Lily longer than she'd hoped it would to track down Chase Lightwood and Holden Randell, the two on opposite ends of the vast hall. But as Lily talked with Chase Lightwood, Lily felt slightly began to slowly feel less stressed. Holden Randell was slightly taller than herself, with a narrow figure and a thin, drawn out face that highlighted his chipped chin. He stuttered in the slightest as he spoke in a tone that felt vaguely familiar. He was kind, at least to Lily, as she spoke, nodding in acknowledgement as she made her pitch and when she finished, he smiled as he thanked her for her time and said he'd get back to her as soon as possible about the position. Holden Randell on the other hand, reassuring as he was, gave Lily less comfort as Chase Lightwood had. Whether or not this was because of his constant habit of interrupting Lily or because of the condescending tone of his comments, Lily couldn't identify. He talked in a way so that he was passively condenceding so that Lily couldn't be annoyed up front about his opinions. It was because of this that grateful when she finally escaped Holden Randell's story of how he fought off a vampire with a mere clove of garlic. Lily found this story rather unipressing despite her forced smile and girl-ish laugh as he told the story. Pretending to be impressed, Lily's expression faded to doubt as she turned away after a polite comment dismissing herself awkwardly.

By the end of the evening, Lily was exhausted and glad to be returning straight home. The neat cottage-style home enclosed by a worn wooden fence, Lily opened the gate and walked up the familiar path to the door. As she entered the house, Lily was greeted by silence. Moving into the drawing room, Lily found Remus reading on the sofa, his traveling cloak draped on the back of a near chair, prepared for a quick exit apparently. The room in which they stood was small, condensed. A lit fireplace on the far wall, a sofa faced the fireplace alone. A chair to the left of the sofa, another single-seated sofa sat to the right as it faced the fireplace diagonally, while a small wooden table was placed between the fireplace and sofa. Looking up as Lily entered, Remus smiled wearily, "You're back."

"I am," Lily smiled. "How was it?" He asked, closing the book in hand in a manner that prevented Lily from seeing the book title. Shrugging as Remus stood, throwing his traveling cloak around his shoulders, Lily said, "It was crowded, but I met a lot of important people in the project, y'know made connections…" Nodding, Remus said, "Ah, that's good. Connections can go a long way."

"Not according to Severus Snape," Lily said without thinking, though she hoped her tone seemed light. Looking from the clasps he'd been closing on his cloak, Remus replied, "What?"

"Severus Snape." Lily repeated with a shrug as she collapsed on the sofa tiredly, slipping off her shoes as to lift her knees to her chest, feet on the sofa edge. "He–he was there? Why?" Remus said, not so much curious but surprised at the mention of him. "He's running the program, from the sounds of it." Lily said, her legs now criss-crossed as she looked up to Remus. He had fresh scars on his face she noticed though she thought it best not to mention this observation. Lily knew he wouldn't be offended but fresh scars were such a common occurrence, there was little point in voicing the observation. "Really? I guess I'm not that surprised, he's been pretty involved in the field from the looks of the _Daily_." Exhaling, Lily nodded. "So you talked with him?" Lily nodded again with a yawn. "How'd that go?" Remus asked, crossing his arms just below his chest. Giving a cynical laugh, Lily said, "Not great, I, 'Have less than desirable experience,' according to him."

"Ah, that sounds like Snape. Well I'm sure it went better with the others?"

"It did," Lily admitted. "I think the rest liked me."

"That's good," Remus said, giving her a reassuring smile. "I suppose...It's just...what if I'm not good enough, what if he's right?" Lily said exasperatedly. "He's not, besides would it be that bad, staying where you are?"

"No, I suppose not," Lily said, more because she knew Remus' opinion about her choice to switch to the auror aid program than because she agreed with him. And Lily saw their point, it was safer at St. Mungo's, but why did she have to play it safe? Why shouldn't she go for this position if she wanted to? Giving another weary smile, Remus said, "I better be off."

"Alright," Lily said, looking to the fire flames sleepily. "Harry asked for me to make sure you go in and say goodnight," Remus added with a smile. Lily looked back to Remus and nodded with a smile, "I always do."

"That you do," He agreed, adding, "Goodnight."

"Night, safe travels," Lily said as she watched Remus retreat out of the room and down the hall towards the front door. Lily sat in the room for a moment, her eyes locked on the fire while her head spun and not just from the wine she'd drunk earlier. Standing a few minutes later, Lily flicked her wand towards the fire causing it to extinguish in a flash. Picking up her shoes, Lily climbed the stairs just outside the drawing room entrance and turned left. Opening the nearest room door softly, Lily peeked into the room. Harry laid fast asleep under his covers. His hair appeared even more disheveled than usual, Lily smiled at the sight. Stepping into the room, Lily approached the bed, bending down and kissing her son's forehead gently as she whispered "Goodnight." Harry stirred only enough to turn and face her before settling back into a deep sleep. Looking to the desk beside herself, drawings of dragons and brooms scattered the desk, his colored pencils dispersed across the surface messily. Lily's eyes, however, looked past the drawings she knew Harry would ask her to hang in the house the next day, Lily looked to the single framed photo on the desk: A man with messy jet black hair and wire-framed glasses, chased a flashing image of a boy no older than a year or so with matching jet black hair and eyes of emerald green, who darted around on a miniature broom. Lily picked up the photo, her fingers touched the image as her eyes focused on the wide smile on the child's face, on _her_ child's face. It'd been forever since she'd seen him smile like that… Looking back to Harry, he remained still in his bed. Setting the photo aside quietly, Lily gave one last look to her son before she left the room. Walking back past the staircase and into the room on the opposite side of the hall, Lily changed into her pajamas and then laid in her bed for several minutes, questioning everything in life as she often did nowadays. Thoughts of whether or not Harry was happy crossing her mind more than once, Lily wondered how he'd react to seeing her even less than he did now, if she got the position in the Auror aid program. It was well past midnight when Lily's mind finally settled and the woman fell asleep in a ball in the middle of the king sized bed like a child.

Meanwhile, across mountains and river, to no one's knowledge, the waves of the North Sea ached to be noticed as they hit the infinite stone walls of Azkaban. Thunder sounded over the waves like a blow-horn, but none of this mattered for within the walls, a crazed looking woman laid, enclosed in a cell. Several soulless creatures of hoods and bones guarded outside the woman's cell, but she cared not. Her eyes were wide as she cackled with glee, her dark, hooded eyes full of energy for the first time in years. The chains on her wrists clattered as she lifted her throbbing left arm, forcing the rags she wore to fall from her forearm and reveal a dark serpent-like mark upon her flesh which pulsed with force. For the first time in seven years, the Dark Mark was active, and across the country like-followers knew, something big was about to transpire.

 **A/N:** Okay! There we have it, another chapter further into our story, I hope you all liked it, I felt that I owed you all a really enticing chapter after the long wait and shortness of the previous chapter, plus the story's been heading this way for awhile now, but here you are. Thanks again for reading, and as always, I always enjoy feedback, constructive or otherwise.


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

 **A/N:** Hello! Thanks for all the comments and follows on the previous chapter! Sorry the delay, but here's the next chapter! Hope you all enjoy it!

Breathing heavily, Severus woke with a start, his hands tightly clamped shut as beads of sweat ran down his forehead. Blinking into the darkness as his eyes slowly adjusted, Severus was suddenly aware of the prickling sensation coming from his left forearm. The pit of his stomach lurching at the realization of what had awoken him, Severus' free hand moved cautiously to the mark on his skin. Even in the darkness, Severus could see the mark was irritated–pulsing. Blinking more, willing his eyes to focus in the darkened lighting, Severus tried to remember what his dream had been about. The pain in his arm penetrating his consciousness, images from the dream he'd been having vaguely surfaced.

It had been a memory–a distant memory–from his earliest days as a Death Eater. Although his vision was impaired by his mask in the live memory, within the dream Severus had had a full view of the man kneeling before him. The man before Severus had thick brown hair that laced into a beard while his bright blue eyes stood out in the darkness of the dream. He was begging, pleading, for his life. The man had been young, perhaps as young as Severus himself had been at the time. Despite that Severus had woken up from the dream before the blinding green light had flashed, his stomach still dropped from the memory. Severus sat in the dark, the memory was so clear, Severus could still hear the man's final scream. Doing his best to gather his thoughts, Severus rubbed his forearm tenderly, as to ease the pain. Surely it had been the memory that had stimulated the Dark Mark, Severus thought to himself, images of the victim's lifeless body flooding to mind, along with the ever-lasting sense of guilt and regret.

It was astounding, Severus marveled, that after years of perfecting the art of Occlumency, he still couldn't rid himself of all the guilt he felt for his past crimes. How much easier life would be, he knew, if he could simply choose to forget. Unfortunately, it wasn't that easy. Laying against his bed, Severus knew he couldn't close his eyes again, not unless he wanted to relive further suppressed memories. After all, at this point in life, Severus was well versed with this dilemma.

Realizing after several more minutes of restlessness that he wasn't going to get any more sleep that night, Severus got up and made his way to the small work space within the living corridors. Flicking his wand as he did so, a dim shade of light filled the space. Piles of papers rested on the mahogany desk within the work space, the contents of papers varying from published works, to the papers he had yet to grade on the Sleeping Draught, to applications for the Auror Aid program. Picking up the first papers he saw, Severus skimmed the application, still blurry eyed. Throwing the application in the near trash bin before he even finished reading it, Severus took the seat before his desk as he picked up the next paper: A published text on Doxy venom. Skimming this too, Severus threw this article into another pile as to read at a later time. Proceeding to separate the rest of the stacks of paper into separated piles, Severus rarely paused as he read. Most of it was garbage, he knew. Setting the Sleeping Draught papers aside in their own pile, Severus figured he should return to those when he was feeling less irritable.

Slowly but surely, the sun rose and Severus began to hear the first stirrings of the castle. Eventually reaching the desk below the many papers, it was only then that Severus came across the last of the Auror Aid applications. Praying that the last of the applications were better than those before, Severus skimmed through them hastily: Molly Taylor, Robert Holstead, Henry Abbott, and...Lily's. Severus stared at her application blankly. Severus had already read Lily Potter's application enough times to memorize it. Having had come across the application repeatedly as he had read through his stack of papers, each time Severus found himself unable to decide what to do with it. Part of Severus had hoped he would find someone better, but as the stack of acceptable applicants thinned, Severus begun to fear he'd have no better options.

All biases aside, her application wasn't...awful. It wasn't great either, though. Her experience was minimal, but her work from St. Mungos seemed adequate enough to balance out her prior failings. Her track record with successes seemed promising, however her application showed little experience outside her comfort zone, which would be problematic when it came to the Auror Aid program. And then there were her recommendation letters. Severus wasn't surprised to see the large collection of recommendation letters just as he wasn't surprised to see each letter praise Lily as a hard-working, impressively intelligent, and highly committed scholar. This was all stuff Severus already knew about Lily Potter. Reading and rereading the application, after much debate, Severus set Lily's application in the stack of possible Healers for the program along with Alden Oliveia and Darlene Johnson's and then moved onto the final applications, his left forearm still burning as he did so. All the while, the castle grew louder as the light began to show through the thin curtains of the chamber windows and stress began to nag at Severus stomach; for as by half past twelve, Severus needed to have a list of eligible applicants for the program fellows he'd assigned: Esmé Sinclair and Holden Radell. Severus had done his best to find a better applicant than Holden Randall for his fellow Potion Master, but knew, despite the man's arrogance, Randall was the best option. Esmé had been an easy choice for the Head Healer position as she was, by far, the most experienced and qualified healer that had applied.

Leaving the castle shortly before noon, Severus reached the small chamber labeled _679_ within the Ministry of Magic with barely a minute to spare. Entering the room, Esmé, Fudge and Holden Randall already sat around the table, which centered the room, each yelling at one another. Apparently they'd already begun the meeting. The room they sat in was round and matched the rest of the Ministry with its shiny emerald green walls and floors, and white marble trimmings. From the sound of it, Holden Randall was yelling about needing to hold the program to higher standards while Esmé scoffed loudly and said, "We'd be lucky to have such a hard working girl in the program!"

"People, people! Please!" Fudge said exasperatedly, motioning for the rest to settle down. Stepping further into the room, Severus approached the table tensely. Acknowledging Severus, Esmé said, raising her voice to be heard, "Severus, what do you think?"

"About?" He asked, his voice even.

"The applicants. Which applicant did you think was best?" she asked while Randall rolled his eyes and said lowly, "We're not hiring some amatur–"

"She's _not_ an amature," Esmé exhaled dramatically, flipping her hiar. "And it's Severus and the Minister's choice–not yours."

"I didn't particularly think any of them were very promising," Severus answered, taking the seat beside Esmé.

"But, if you had to choose–because you do–which?" Esmé said, throwing a hardening look at Randall. Shifting in his seat, Severus said, "Alden Oliveia or Darlene Johnson were, I'd say, the most... _eligible_ applicants."

"See, even Snape agrees with me!" Randall said boastfully, slamming the table in victory. Glaring at Randall, Severus said coldly, "I didn't agree _with_ you, they're simply the most qualified." Sighing, Esmé said disappointedly, "What about Lily Potter? Did you see her application?"

"I did," said Severus. "And? Don't you think she's good?" Severus could tell from the way Esmé spoke, she was offended Severus hadn't thought Lily was as eligible as she had hoped he would. "She was fine, but she clearly lacked experience. I just don't believe she'd be... the best option.," Severus said carefully, trying not to show any biases for or against her. "I just think, if we only gave her a chance, she could be great," Esmé said, borderline begging. "It's two against one," Randall said childishly, giving Esmé a gloated look. "Minister, what do you think?" Esmé said desperately, looking to Fudge who had been watching the rest with a look of amusement. Throwing his hands back, Fudge said, "I'm really only here to regulate this program and stand in for the Auror Head, as he's unable to be here today. Severus is the program head, ultimately the decision rests with him." All eyes looked to Severus at this. Exhaling, Severus said squarely, "Let's take a count. One vote each. Is there anyone else besides Oliveia, Johnson, and Potter, that we want to include in the count?" Looking around the table, everyone shook their head. "Okay, Oliveia," Severus said formally, taking count of who voted. Randall's hand went up.

"Johnson," Severus continued cooly, followed by Fudge's hand rising up. "Potter," Esmé's arm shot up as she looked impatiently towards the rest. Nodding, Severus said in a monotone, "Right, so we're right where we started."

"What about her recommendation letters?" Esmé said, looking to Severus, "What was there, like five letters! And one from Albus Dumbledore!"

"So what?" Randall spat crudely. "So, why are you all so convinced she's not worth it?" Esmé asked, pleadingly. Severus studies Esmé and she starred right back at him. Severus had never seen her advocate for someone so aggressively, and he was torn between amusement and annoyance towards his friend. "Just give her a chance?" Esmé meekly suggested, "A month? A week at least?"

"Why are you so convinced she _is_ worth it?" Severus asked finally. "Because, she's only a few years into this field and she's already one of my most prominent students–Because, she's been through a lot–"

"Her _son_ doesn't have to do with this," Randall said, "She's a nice girl, but this isn't charity."

"No one said it was," Esmé replied coarsely. "Severus, just give her a chance? These other people might be smart, but Lily Potter, she–she really cares for her patients…. Please?"

"Okay…. I'll give her a month. Only."

"WHAT?" Randall said, embittered. A smile broke out over Esmé's face as she said, "Really?"

"But, if she messes up, Esmé, that's on you. She's your responsibility, and if she falls behind even in the slightest."

"Really? You mean it?" Esmé asked, gleefully. Severus simply continued to study the women, before he answered, "Her resmué showed...potential. Otherwise, I wouldn't bother."

"What about Oliveia?" Randall whined. "What about him?" Severus said dryly. "He was obviously the most qualified, why would you settle on some subpar resident Healer?" Randall continued on. "I'm sorry," Severus said with the faintest sneer, "I didn't realize the Minister assigned you as Head of this program." Looking to Fudge, Severus continued, "Minister, did you assign Randall as Head of this program without it being brought to my attention?" Laughing, Fudge said with suppressed smile, "I don't believe I did."

"Well, in that case, Randall, I recommend keeping your opinions to yourself from now on, unless asked directly. Otherwise, I fear, you might find yourself out of a job." Randall's eyes wide and mouth half open, Severus could tell the man was debating whether or not to speak again. Severus watched, with satisfaction, as the man opted to close his mouth, straighten his posture and shift his gaze away without another word. Refocusing his gaze back upon Esmé, who looked to be particularly happy with the outcome of events, Severus repeated, as to further ensure Esmé's understanding, "One month." Beaming, Fudge clapped his hands together enthusiastically as he said, "Brilliant! Well, I'm glad that's figured out!" and stood with an air of finality. Randall, still silent and fuming, stood as well. "Thank you, Severus," Esmé smiled, happily, as she followed the rest out, walking passed Randall with her nose in the air.

Severus' arm still stinging as he left the chamber, his fingers traced the mark anxiously as he trailed behind the rest, towards the lifts.

 **A/N:** Thanks again for reading! I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, and look forward to hearing what you all thought about it!


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

 **A/N:** Hello lovelies! As always, thank you all so much for all the kind feedback on the last chapter and I hope you all like this next one!

"Mum! Mum! Look at me!" Harry called out with glee as he flew around the yard on his broom, one hand waving in the air vigorously at Lily and Remus as he did so. Lily, who sat on the front door steps, laughed as she waved back in amusement and watched. Remus, who stood a few meters before Lily, watched Harry anxiously–ready for disaster to strike. "You know," Lily began with a small smile, "You don't have to watch over him, Harry knows his way around a broom." Remus, resting his hands in his pockets, smiled back at Lily briefly as he nodded, "I know, I know." Shifting over on the steps, making room for two, Lily motioned for Remus to join her. Giving Harry another reluctant look, Remus gave in and took the seat beside Lily on the steps. The two sat in silence, watching Harry for a moment, before Remus said, his eyes on Harry, "Have you heard anything new from the Auror Aid program?" This surprised Lily as neither Remus nor Sirius had shown any more interest in the topic since Lily had initially brought it up. Both seemingly going deaf whenever Lily would bring it up, Lily had figured they had no interest in hearing any more about the program. "Uh, no," Lily admitted, a little embarrassed. However, Lily wasn't sure whether it was a good or bad sign that she hadn't heard back from anyone about the program and feared it meant the latter. "Ah, well, I'm sure it'll all work out for the best, either way," Remus said comfortingly. "Yes, I suppose so," Lily shrugged, "I just really thought I could be good, you know?"

"Well, I'm sure you would be. Besides you haven't been rejected, yet." Remus pointed out with a reassuring smile. Laughing lightly, Lily breathed out deeply, "Which feels like a bad sign." Looking to Lily in his peripheral vision curiously, Remus asked, his voice hesitant, "So, can I ask you something?" Looking to Remus in return, a little startled by the seriousness of his tone, Lily said, "Of course?"

"Why is this so important to you? I mean, I know Sirius and I haven't been the most supportive of it, but it seems like you're really determined to join the program?" Remus asked, effortlessly, as if he'd been waiting for a while to ask this. "Uh, what makes you think it's so important to me?" Lily questioned.

"Because you applied, knowing it'll change Harry and your schedule. It'll change things, won't it?" Remus answered, giving her another tired smile. Lily was quiet for a pause, considering Remus' words. He had a point, she realized. Part of Lily had assumed her persistence for the position was in response to Remus and Sirius' initial dismissal of the program, but her dedication to the program had grown with her ambition.

"It won't change much, anyways, I want to help, Remus. I want to make a difference, you know? After–after everything with James…..I just have a really good feeling about it." Lily said earnestly after another pause. "So, it's about James?" Remus asked further. Lily watched Harry, not answering immediately. "Harry, Dear, not so high," Lily instructed, raising her voice to be heard. Audibly whining, Harry protested loudly, "Mum, I'm fine."

"Lower," Lily said sternly. Obeying, his eyes rolling to the back of his head, slowly but surely, Harry and his broom sunk a few feet lower. "It's not about James," Lily said with a sigh, "It's about Harry and I….I want better, for both of us."

"This job won't necessarily get you that," Remus pointed out, looking to Lily. "But it could be. I'm still–I'm still trying to figure things out, that's all. And, like I said, I think it'll be good. I think I'll be doing good," Lily smiled, adding as she stood, "Harry, I'm going to make lunch."

"Okay," he called back as he balanced on his broom, testing his boundaries. "You'll watch him?" Lily asked with an expression torn between exhaustion and amusement. "Of course," Remus nodded, standing as well.

Once inside, Lily began to pull out the sandwich-making supplies and coat the bread in pastes. Although the conversation she'd had with Remus was still on her mind, more importantly, thoughts of the Auror Aid program came to mind. Remus' inquiries had been kind, Lily knew, and had come from a place of concern, but nonetheless, for one of the first times in her life, Lily didn't feel a need to second guess her choices. It had been hard, in the beginning, when everything with James and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had first happened. Lily had tried for so long to fix everything, to make things right once more. It'd taken her a long time to realize that things would never be right again, at least, not in the same way. Lily had spent so many of the first years trying to solve something that couldn't be solved. But Lily knew, it wasn't about fixing the past, but about creating a future. For his sake–for James' sake. And for Harry. Harry needed a life, and it was Lily's job to make that for him. Setting each of the three sandwiches on their own plate and onto the table, Lily went out to the front to call in Harry. Stepping into the open door-frame, Lily found Harry on the ground, his broom in his lap. Remus sat crouched beside Harry, the two appeared to be talking. The conversation apparently important, Remus' hand rested on Harry's shoulder supportively. "Lunch,"she announced, causing Harry and Remus to look up. "Okay, we'll be in," Remus nodded, giving a motion of acknowledgment. Moving back into the kitchen, as to give them privacy, Lily stood against the kitchen counter patiently. Her eyes falling on the small pile of mail that sat on the counter from earlier that morning, Lily looked towards the entrance hall. No sound of Remus and Harry entering, Lily moved over to the mail. Having been gone that morning, retrieving more ingredients for Healer Sinclair, Lily begun to sift through the mail. A notice from St. Mungo's about her paycheck, an advertisement for _A Witch's Everyday Beautifying Solution_ , some more junk mail, and–a letter from the Ministry of Magic.

Lily couldn't believe it, even as she read and re-read the letter:

 _Dear Mrs. Potter,_

 _We are proud to announce that after careful consideration, we,_

 _at The Ministry of Magic's Auror Department, have deemed you_

 _the best applicant for the open Healer's position within the sub-branch_

 _Auror Aid Program. You will be contacted directly by the program leader, Severus Snape, within due time with further information. Further confirmation forms and guidelines can be found in the enclosed envelope._

 _-_ _Pauline Healy,_

 _Pauline Healy, Head of Auror Administrative Office_

A rush of excitement rising in her stomach each new time she read the letter, Lily couldn't believe her eyes. Harry and Remus coming into the kitchen as Lily re-read the letter once more, Remus said, "Sorry about that, Harry and I were just talking about some stuff." Looking up, startled, Lily said, "Hm, oh, no, of course, right."

"What's that?" Remus asked, taking notice to the letter in her hands as he and Harry took their seats at the table. "It's, um," Lily laughed nervously, "I got in," she breathed, relief hitting her. "What?" Remus asked, confusedly. "Got into what?" Harry asked curiously. Walking over and handing the letter to Remus, Remus read the paper aloud while Harry watched. "You got a new job?" Harry asked once Remus finished. "I did," Lily beamed, proudly. "Congratulations," Remus said distractedly, his eyes still observing the letter.

"Why?" Harry asked, concernedly.

"Uh, 'why' what, Harry?" Lily laughed, as Remus handed the letter back with a supportive smile. "Why would you get a new job? You only just got the job you have now, Mum?" Harry elaborated, his lips curling down in apprehension. "Well, because, this job is better," Lily explained, giving Harry's shoulder a squeeze, caringly. "How? Will I get to see you more?" He asked, looking up at her from the sandwich he'd begun eating. "Eh, no, Sweetie. Actually, I'll be working a bit later, but–" Lily started, phrasing her words with caution, "Even later?!" Harry exclaimed, his eyes wide. Setting his sandwich down, sipping the glass of milk Lily had set out for him, and then looking back to Lily, Lily sighed deeply at her son's expression. He looked thoughtful as he waited for Lily's explanation. Brushing the hair out of his face, Lily smiled sadly, "Darling, it's a good job. It'll help me learn more, and than I'll be able to help others….This is a good thing, Sweetheart." Harry gave her an attentive breath of air, before he continued to eat his sandwich. Lily continuing to stroke his hair, Remus and Lily exchanged a cautious look. Lily knew what he was thinking. Why was it Lily found herself repeatedly justifying this program? how many times had she said, "This is a good thing," that day; To Remus, to Harry. Who else did she have to explain herself to? The excitement that had filled her stomach so fully before left her body. Only worry remained, now. Taking her seat beside Harry, Lily squeezed Harry's hand comfortingly. Pulling his hand away, Harry murmured, "I'm eating, Mum." Lily's eyes lingered on her child worriedly as Remus said, "Look at it this way, Harry, now Uncle Sirius and I can take you to practice quidditch more often." Not meeting Lily or Remus' eyes, Harry nodded solemnly. "When do you start?" Harry asked as he finished washing his dish. "Mid June," Lily said, forcing another smile, as to reassure Harry further. "That's during summer vacation," Harry grumbled, moving to leave the kitchen.

"But, we'll still go on trips to Diagon Alley together, and to parks. Harry, I'll always make time for you. This won't change anything, not really," Lily justified. Harry didn't reply to this, his brows furrowed deeply as he left.

"Great," Lily groaned, taking Remus' and her own plate and washing them. "It'll be okay, Lily," Remus said, though his tone wasn't convincing. "Yeah," She agreed, only to end the conversation. Remus must've been able to sense this, as he said, "I have to go, but I'll see you next week."

"Yeah," Lily said again, adding, "Remus," as he left towards the front door. Looking back at her, Lily continued, "Thank you, I really appreciate you coming over and watching Harry, and not just today." Laughing mildly, Remus nodded, "It's my pleasure. I'll see you next week?."

"Yeah, bye," Lily smiled good-heartedly. "Mhm, goodbye," Remus said in return before he left.

Going up stairs after she finished putting away the dishes, Lily found Harry in his room, drawing on the floor. Entering the room, Lily sat on the edge of Harry's bed, craning her neck to watch over Harry's shoulder as he drew. Harry continued to ignore her as he drew. It appeared to be, from the looks of it, a drawing of another dragon. Lily was used to this, ever since Harry was little, he'd go through phases of specifically themed drawings: Trees, castles, brooms, snitches, dragons. "Harry?" Lily said softly, "Talk to me, please."

"About?" He said lowly, not looking up as he spoke. "Anything? How do you feel about me taking this new job?"

"I don't know," Harry lied, adding begrudgingly, "Annoyed."

"How about you stop drawing for a minute and tell me more about that?" Lily coaxed, gently. Ceasing his scribbling for a pause, Harry hesitated before he got up and walked over to Lily so that he stood before her. Not meeting her gaze, his face was scrunched up unhappily. Smiling maternally, Lily said, "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

"Yeah," Harry nodded, meeting her gaze at this. Her smile widening, Lily raised her eyebrows pressingly.

"I'm tired of everything changing, Mum," Harry said, his gaze dropping once more. "I don't like it," he pouted. "What do you mean?" She asked, confused by this response. "Because," he sighed, as if explaining something to a child, "First, I had to start a new school, and than you went back to work, and Uncle Sirius and Remus don't stay with us anymore, and than I had to switch schools _,_ and then you started working at St. Mungo's, and now," Harry took a deep inhale, "You want to start another job!" Sighing, Lily said as she brushed the side of his face, "Hmm, I see."

"I don't like it, Mum. At all." Harry said, frankly, like a disapproving parent. "I know it's hard, but change is inevitable, Harry." Lily said, watching him carefully as she spoke.

"This much change? Because, I don't like it," He said, throwing his arms up in frustration. Laughing gingerly at this, this only furthered Harry's disapproving expression. "Maybe not as much change as we've had over the years, but, it's just how things are," Lily said, trying her best to explain it properly. "I don't want anymore change," Harry repeated. Exhaling profoundly, Lily said, "How about this: How about I take this new job, and I keep it for awhile? And no more switching schools until Hogwarts?" Pausing, Harry took a moment to consider this before he nodded, a small smile turning on his lips, "No more changes?"

"No more changes–for awhile." Lily smiled. "For how long?" Harry said, as if negotiating. "For awhile. But Harry, things have to change, eventually." Lily said, gripping his arm consolingly. Pursing his lips, Harry thought about this too before he nodded again and said, "But not so quickly?"

"Yeah, we'll slow down the changes, Harry. I promise. Things will settle down." Lily promised, pulling Harry into a hug and kissing his forehead. "Okay," Harry nodded, hugging Lily back tightly.

"Love you, Mum," Harry whispered, and Lily smiled affectionately. "I love you too, Harry," kissing his head once more, as she repeated, "No more change, Sweetheart."

 **A/N:** Thanks again for reading! What did you guys think? Feedback is always appreciated. Once more, thanks for reading!


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

" _That's her?"_ Lily heard as she entered the room.

"Yeah, Potter's mum," Said a man.

"Aw, poor thing," A woman whispered lowly, as if Lily wouldn't be able to hear, regardless that she was only a mere two rows in front of them.

"Yeah, really," much colder, voice said. "Oh hush," Came the woman's voice again, as Lily took her seat, doing her best to ignore the comments. Lily was used to this, presumptions, opinions about her life, it wasn't uncommon.

Her stomach turning, Lily looked around the room. Overwhelmed by everything, everyone around her appeared comfortable with each other, all gathered in groups, the fellows on the project talked amicably as they waited patiently for the meeting to begin. Lily watched nervously as the Prime Minister and Head of the Auror Department conversed with fellow colleagues. Tuning out the group behind her to the best of her ability, Lily focussed on the others in the room. The room was fuller than she'd expected, which she supposed made sense as the entirety of the auror program as well as Ministry Officials were present, as the program was for the aurors' benefit. Suddenly Lily was filled with a feeling of complete nauseousness

Part of her wondered how on earth someone could agree to take on as much responsibility as this position came with before realizing that soon enough, she too would be up in front of them all, debriefing cases, explaining techniques of healing, advancing each individuals knowledge in some way.

People around Lily loudly laughed as they talked, exchanging stories of their most recent encounters whilst on the job. Lily listened, in means to hear something other than the group behind her. A man nearby spoke of his encounter with a troll outside some small village Lily had never heard of, while an older witch repeatedly told of a man who had tried to smuggle a variety of dark artifacts out of the country in his expandable trunk. "You wouldn't believe what I had to deal with, Robert," She said over and over, in both amusement and superiority, to the man beside her. "Oh, I'm sure I wouldn't be too surprised," the man, Robert, responded with a chuckle. "Some of these folk, Adrianne, well, they think they can get away with anything!" He exclaimed as Adrianne laughed in agreement.

The noise beginning to die down as the woman laughed, Lily only realized once she looked around that the others were beginning to take their seats. Looking to the front row, straining her neck over the three rows in front of her, Lily waited anxiously. The door at the back of the room opening abruptly, all heads turned towards the sound as Severus walked in. Not so much as even acknowledging the entirety of the room, Severus shuffled through the stack of papers in his hands, reading as he entered the room. Down the center isle Severus moved while everyone watched in silence. Looking up once he reached the front of the room, Severus was off. Suddenly he was talking about a million things at once. Lily listened uncertainty, looking to her left and right, several others seemed to have brought note pads and were scribbling down his every word with haste. Healer Sinclair a little ways down Lily's row, she too appeared to be taking notes. Lily had been under the impression this was only an introduction and felt unexpectedly unprepared. Hand outs beginning to be dispersed into the crowd, Lily barely had any time to read the article titles as Severus began to pace the front of the room. The worse part, Lily realized, was that everyone around her seemed prepared. Very few looked quit as lost as Lily. Though Lily did take ease in knowing she wasn't the most lost, as a girl with a squirmish nature appeared more so confused than Lily. Dropping her pencil, her papers fell to the floor as she reached for the pencil. Scattered, Severus stopped momentarily, to watch the girl scrambled to collect the papers, before he continued on without comment as the girl whispered "Sorry, sorry."

"This program is in no way a crutch. I will not let someone else suffer because your own neglect in doing your due diligence…." Severus stated blankly, his eyes passing over the group as he came to a stop in the center of the space before them all.

By the end of the meeting, Lily had not a single doubt in her mind that she had woefully overestimated her abilities. Never had she been made to feel so lost within such a minimal amount of time. Lily watched cautiously as everyone began to rise, collecting their possessions and making to leave. As everyone did this, Lily noticed how everyone seemed to know everyone else. Several people approaching Severus, he looked relaxed as he spoke with the people around. It was impressive, Lily acknowledged, the way in which Severus managed to switch so naturally between his professional mannerism and a man who was seemingly approachable to all but her. She kept forgetting, this new Severus before her was much different than the one she'd known. Gathering her bag and papers, Lily chanced a few glances Severus' way, curiously. Although Lily knew it was silly, part of her wondered, just as she had the last time she'd seen him, why she felt as if Severus was ignoring her singularly. Never once looking in her direction as he'd been speaking, now he seemed to be doing just the same. An older man with white tufts of hair and a rounded face speaking to Severus about something, Lily was even more surprised to see Severus smirking amusedly at whatever the older man had said. Yes, this was indeed a very different, more compartmentalized man than she'd known.

Holding tightly to the stack of paper handouts, Lily jumped in surprise as someone said, "Lily?" It was Healer Sinclair, of course. "Hi," Lily said, trying to compose herself. Laughing, Sinclair said, "What did you think?"

"Oh, um, you know…It's a lot..." Lily began weakly, forcing a smile. Laughing further, Sinclair said kindly, "It's normal for you to feel overwhelmed." Lily's smile shifting, a little more genuine now, she said, "I'm not sure I should feel this overwhelmed, though…Not on day one at least." Shaking her head, Sinclair said, "It'll take you sometime to get into the flow of things, that's all, I'm sure."

"How does he expect us to know all of this?" Lily asked, smiling nervously as she motioned towards the pile of papers in her hand. Smiling, Sinclair replied, "It's all important stuff." Nodding, Lily looked away uncomfortably. How childish it was, Lily realized, to have assumed she could jump into a program like this without preparing beforehand. And how unlike herself, Lily realized, for her to be unprepared. Lily, rather naively she knew, had figured the position wouldn't have been that much more advanced than the work she was already doing at St. Mungo's. Apparently, she was very wrong about this. "I'm sure you'll be fine, Lily," Sinclair smiled supportively. Nodding again, Lily said, "Yeah, thanks, I'll figure it out."

"If you want, I'd be willing to go over some of the material with you?" Sinclair offered, politely. "Oh, no, I'll–um–I'll be fine, thanks, though…." Lily replied. "Are you sure?" Sinclair said, giving Lily a curious look. "Yeah, thanks. I–I have to be going, but thanks. I'll, you know, look over the material. I'll make it work," Lily said, in what she hoped was an optimistic tone. Smiling enthusiastically, Sinclair nodded, "Great, and like I said, don't hesitate to ask for help. From me, or Severus. Randell on the other hand, I'd try to avoid, but maybe that's just me." Laughing weakly at the last part, Lily said, "Okay, I'll make sure to note that."

"Do," Sinclair smiled. The woman giving Lily a supportive squeeze of the arm before walking off, Lily groaned aloud once Sincair was out of earshot. The only thing Lily disliked more than being lost was being pitied, though she knew Sincair meant well. The idea of going to Severus, after he'd made it so plainly clear he didn't want her in this program, well, it was more than humiliating.

As Lily left, she was displeased to hear that the group from earlier had resumed to talking about her. Blocking the isle out, Lily heard one of them say quietly as she approached, "How does she know Esmé Sincair?"

"She probably doesn't, everyone just knows her," The woman said to the group. Laughing, the man with the cold tone said, "That's probably how she got here: Connections."

"Don't say that," the woman laughed softly, shaking her head. Adding, "I'm sure she's perfectly qualified."

"I'm just saying, it doesn't hurt that you-know-who targeted her and her son _and_ killed her husband." Lily, who had been standing back just in earshot of the group, waiting for the group to disperse so she could pass, felt a rush of heat rise in her. Her cheeks coloring, Lily said, just loud enough to be heard, "Do you? I'd be happy to trade spots with you than? Really." Her voice cold and harsh, the group looked over in shock. Their faces pale, Lily's eyes were narrowed like slits as she said, "You should really find other things other than my life to discuss, because I promise it's no picnic in the park. And," Lily looked directly at the man who'd been speaking, with his thick dark hair and abrupt hazel eyes, "For your information, I've worked just as hard as you to get here. And my ' _connections'_ played no role in my being here!" This last part wasn't entirely true, but Lily figured it would get her point across to them. Her voice having risen, only in the slightest, the commotion seemed to have drawn the attention of the room regardless. Many in the room watched the scene anxiously, as Lily gave the room a once over. Severus watched her from across the room, the rest of those by his side doing the same. Her line of vision finding Severus' for a second, Lily looked to the floor as more color moved to her face uncomfortably. This wasn't because the entire room stared at her or because Severus watched her just as the rest but rather because as head of the program, Severus saw the outburst. And in a flash, Lily's burst of anger turned to embarrassment. Facing the group, Lily said, her voice significantly quieter but still firm, "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get home to see my son." The group moving wordlessly out of Lily's way, Lily pushed through the room, not daring to look anywhere besides straight ahead. Not stopping until she reached the building entrance, Lily did her utmost to gather herself as she came to a stop, catching her breath. The water which had begun to flood her vision from the minute she had left the room falling unwillingly, Lily roughly wiped the water away, not allowing herself to become so upset over something so juvenile. Standing, watching the rain which fell outside the building, Lily waited impatiently as she tried to collect herself. Lily knew nothing they had said was true but it still bothered her. The hardest part was, she knew they meant no harm. She remembered, after the Longbottoms had been tortured, everyone, including herself, had talked about "Oh, poor Augustus." They'd all talked about it, it was only natural. None of them knew what it had been like for her. But now–now Lily knew Augustus' pain. Lily figured the pain she felt knowing Harry would never be allowed to know his father must've been similar to how Augustus had felt for the poor Longbottom boy…. _What was his name...Neville?_. Hearing the sound of someone approaching, Lily looked up, over her shoulder. Severus walked down the corridor. Shifting her eyes back out the window awkwardly, Lily knew she'd have to wait until he passed to leave, as to avoid further peculiarity. Trying to look busy, Lily looked up agitatedly as he reached where she stood. Severus taking notice to this, they both knew they couldn't get away with not acknowledging one another. Nodding in the same way he seemed to acknowledge most people, Lily nodded back awkwardly. "Uh, Severus?" Lily added. Looking back at her as he stopped some paces in front of her, Lily stepped forward and she said, folding her arms tensely, "I–I was really hoping we can start over…. For the sake of the program, at least, I'd really like if things between us could be…normal." His eyes unchanging as she spoke, Lily trailed off, her smile faded. Setting his jaw evenly, Severus replied in his usual drawl "Is this not normal?" Stopping mid laugh, Lily realized Severus' expression remained set and unamused. That's right, Severus Snape didn't joke, Lily reminded herself. This was evidently something that had never changed about him. "Oh, um, I don't know. It just seems like since we haven't really spoken since...Well, since I don't know when...I just figured, things might be a little...tense?..." Lily said, not meeting his eyes. Severus watched her, as if she was a problem, waiting to be solved. "My apologies that you feel that way, Mrs. Potter, but–"

"Lily," Lily said, just as she had the last time they'd spoken. His expression changing only in the slightest, Lily wondered what he was thinking. Did he think she was being childish? Did he think this was unneeded? Had he really not given their previous friendship a single thought since they'd come across one another in the last weeks?

Lily watched as, for the first time since they were children, she saw as Severus looked away uneasily. " _Lily,_ " Severus begun, cautiously, "I have no issues with you, truely." Even as he said this, Lily got the feeling it wasn't true. "Oh...it just seemed…." Lily said, uncertainty. "I assure you, I treat you just as I treat everyone else," Severus said, beginning to show impatience. "Right….So, you don't hate me?" Lily laughed timidly. Looking passed Lily as he spoke, Severus replied, "I'd have to know you in order to be able to hate you, wouldn't I?" Feeling her face warm up, not unlike it had previously that day, Lily felt annoyance and hurt in the man's words. "I suppose so," Lily agreed, her own voice sounding distant and unlike hers. "Good evening, Mrs–Good evening." Severus said, correcting himself mid sentence. Whether this was a good or bad sign, Lily wasn't sure. Waiting a few minutes after Severus had left the building, Lily too, exited through the entrance doors, into the pouring rain.

 **A/N:** Thanks for reading!


	12. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

 **A/N:** Hello lovelies! Thanks for the comments and follows after the last, and I hope you like this next one! Thanks for reading, enjoy!

"Thanks again, Severus, for doing this," Said Esmé as they walked briskly down the brightly lit corridor. "It's not as if I have anything more pressing to attend to at the moment," Severus said dryly, with a faint look of comic upon expression. Laughing softly, Esmé replied, "Already bored with the Auror Aid Program, are we?"

"No, not yet. Ask me again in a few months time, and I might say differently though," Severus countered, allowing the faintest of a smile to which Esmé conceded with, "That's fair." The two continuing to walk, passing people moved out of their way instinctively, for no obvious or apparent reason other than that Severus and Esmé were clearly on a mission. "Left," Esmé instructed as they came to a crossed-paths, her arms motioning as she spoke. Following, Severus said, his tone shifted to a professional inquire, "So, explain again, the women's state? Entirely comatosed?"

"Yes," said Esmé with a defeated sigh. "And you've taken what measures to restore her?" Severus questioned further as they took another left, and began to climb a flight of steps. "Severus, I've really tried everything. Everything from _Reparifors_ to a _Mandrake Restorative Draught_ ," Esmé said exasperatedly, glancing to him as she spoke. " _Wiggenweld Potion?_ " Severus asked, as they stepped into the room Esmé'd indicated to turn into. Coming to an abrupt halt as he did so, in a manner so that Esmé physically ran into him, Lily Potter sat in the room, countless amounts of papers around her as she worked. Proceeding to enter, as Lily looked up at the commotion, her eyes moved between Esmé and Severus, looking rather just as surprised as Severus felt at seeing Lily there. He'd anticipated running into her, perhaps in the halls, but Esmé hadn't mentioned Lily being involved in the project in the slightest. Throwing him a curious look as she stepped past him into the room, Esmé said, "Made any progress?" She was evidently addressing Lily. Shaking her head, Lily said uncertainty, "I don't know what else we can do?"

Making his way over the the body on the bed, Severus surveyed the woman. "She looked much worse when she first arrived: bruises, broken bones, six of which were ribs. It took quite a lot of mending, looked as if she'd really taken a beating." Esmé said, seeing Severus survey her. The woman still had light bruising across her face, Severus observed. "And you tried the _Wiggenweld Potion?_ " Severus asked once more, as he hadn't heard an answer before. "Yes," Lily answered, continuing, "That was one of the first things we did."

"Do you have any ideas, Severus?" Esmé asked, concernedly.

"Perhaps," Severus said, bringing out his wand, Severus began to murmur lowly as his wand moved above the women's lifeless looking body. Lily and Esmé remained silent as he did so. Performing all the incantations he saw fit, finally, Severus lowered his wand, his brows furrowed. "What is it?" Esmé asked quietly, watching him closely. Severus could tell, whatever was ailing the women was far more powerful than Esmé had made him first believe. Eying the women, with more precision now, Severus just shook his head silently, and continued to exam her, tapping his wand occasionally to the woman's temple.

Nothing.

 _Most peculiar_ , Severus thought to himself, wondering if it was really possible. "Where did you find her?" Severus asked, interestedly. "An alley. Well the aurors did," Esmé answered, approaching the woman beside Severus as Lily watch Severus' back, rather anxiously. Her papers forgotten, Lily perked up her ears as to not miss a word Severus said. Despite their last encounter, Lily regarded Severus as one of the most skillful potions master's she knew, if also a git, and knew anything that apparently stumped him must be something to worry over. "I–I believe…" Severus began cautiously, "She'd been cursed."

"We've taken all measure's to restore her from any sort of possible curses," Lily said, speaking up. Appearing lost in thought, Severus looked up to Lily, over his shoulder, after a pause and said, "Not all."

Standing, Lily rounded the other side of the women's bed, so that she faced Severus and Esmé. "Healer Sinclair?" Came a voice. All three heads turning to the door, a mousey looking boy with brown curls stood. "Yes?" Esmé said, distractedly. "Mr. O'Brian is seizing," the boy said. "What?!" Esmé exclaimed, her attention drawing in at the news. "I have to go," she said, looking to Severus. Simply nodding, his eyes followed Esmé as she bounded out of the room after the resident and called, "I'll find you after, Severus."

And then, there were two.

Not meeting Lily's gaze, ashamed of their last encounter, the same thoughts that circled his mind than found him now. It wasn't a matter of trying to be rude, but rather, keeping a distance. He wished she understood. The memory echoed in Severus' mind as he stood across the woman he'd given so much for.

" _But, how, Dumbledore? It's impossible." Severus had asked, his voice shaking. "'How?' Severus, you know the answer," Dumbledore had replied empathetically. Looking passed Dumbledore, as the two men stood in the crowded office within Hogwarts, Severus fell quiet. It'd been late, almost four in the morning, but the two men still conversed. The rest of the order had gone, and left Severus alone with Dumbledore, to Severus' relief at the time. "Love," Dumbledore said as Severus looked to his feet at the word. "Lily willingly accepted death, not from despair or anger, but from love. Love for her son, Harry. She was willing to die for him," Dumbledore said when Severus said nothing. "Love doesn't save lives," Severus retorted, not satisfied with the answer. "It's certainly saved yours, has it not?" Dumbledore mused, seeing irony in the situation before them. Shooting Dumbledore a look of both loathing and resentment, a look derived from the sense of weakness, Severus said, hopelessly, "Is he really gone, than?"_

" _Ahh, that is a question only time can answer." Dumbledore sighed, moving to his desk and sitting before it. "But you must have a guess?" Severus said irritably, taking the seat opposite Dumbledore. "You see, Severus, this is what makes you wise. You don't accept good-enough, or like excuses," Dumbledore smiled, a little too gleefully. Rolling his eyes, Severus starred the man back, unwaveringly. Blue glittering eyes against dark determined black pupils. "He'll be back," Dumbledore nodded, most mournfully, his head dropping in affirmative._

" _So, she's not safe?"_

" _As long as Lily chooses to protect her son with her life, no, she is not." Dumbledore agreed, popping the lemon drop which he'd retrieved from the glass dish beside him into his mouth appeasingly. Standing up bluntly, Severus said hollowly, "Than we must do more!" The chair he'd been sitting in flying back on its own accord from the determination in Severus' voice. "Indeed, that we must," Dumbledore nodded, not even jumping at Severus' sudden aggression. "But, brash moves driven by…." For the first time that evening, Dumbledore seemed uncertain on how to say what he needed to. "Emotions, sentiments….They play no role in logic, Severus. You know this, just as I…."_

" _Aren't you the one always arguing that 'love' cures all?" Severus ridiculed. "Ahh, it does, but that doesn't mean it's always wise. In fact, it's often times just the opposite. Don't let emotions lead you, Severus, let them motivate you–empower you, so to speak." Severus looked blankly back at Dumbledore, speechless for one of the first times in his life. Dumbledore's brows furrowed, he watched Severus, questioningly. "How dare you suggest I'd ever be so reckless," Severus said at last. Dumbledore sighed as he said, his voice stern , "You've done it before, Severus. I'm simply reminding you of our objective here,"_

" _How–The hypocrisy!" Severus fumed, glaring at Dumbledore. Dumbledore paid the other man's anger little heed as he said, "There will come a time, when Voldemort–" Severus flinched at the name, "Will return, when evil prevails and hope seems lost," Dumbledore sighed, saddeningly. "When this time comes, Harry Potter must be protected over even the life of Lily," Severus looked away once more, uncomfortably. "You must know this Severus, but more so, you must abide to this when the time comes."_

 _Severus looked up to Dumbledore, and suddenly, all the anger was washed away with a look of pain and sorrow. The mere idea pained Severus, but the realization that one day, this would happen, well, it destroyed him. "I thought we were protecting them both? I thought she protected him? With 'love'? Why would we ruin that?" Severus said, his voice sharp and hardened. "And when Harry turns seventeen, that will be broken. Lily will only be an obstacle for us at that point. If the time comes, and it's one or the other, Harry must come first," Dumbledore sighed, heavily. Gritting his teeth, Severus shook his head, grimmly, "That wasn't the agreement, Albus."_

" _That, Severus, is reality." Dumbledore exhaled, "Regardless of how painful–"_

" _Painful?" Severus spat, scornfully, anger resurfacing again. "You lied–" Severus began, as Dumbledore said, his voice rising like only his could, in a way that made all others mute and cower, "You agreed to protect Harry Potter, no matter what, Severus, and you will stick to that," before he added, "For the sake of Lily! If you truly love–"_

" _Stop," Severus pleaded, closing his eyes. "Do you believe she'd ever forgive you, if you let her child die?" And, when Severus opened his eyes, Dumbledore found the pain of an entire lifetime of disappointment in the other man's eyes. "I thought….I thought we could save them both?" He whimpered, watching Dumbledore pleadingly. "We'll try, but I can make not guarantees, Severus, and for this, I apologize. Before, I thought I could, but…."_

" _I don't want your pity," Severus said, emotionlessly._

" _I only tell you this to save you, Severus," Dumbledore tried to explain. "Save? You've broken me," Severus snapped, so harshly, Dumbledore closed his own eyes and took Severus' anger without question. "I wish I'd never heard that bloody prophecy," He continued, resentfully, in a manner that implied it was Dumbledore's fault he had. "I'm telling you this Severus to make you realize, in exchange for Harry's safety, you can no longer act purely on your devotion to Lily. We must prioritize Harry, the entire Wizarding World is dependant on it." He explained, regaining Severus' attention. Severus starred at Dumbledore, willing him to say that this moment was merely a test and that Lily would always be safe, but no such moment arose. And so, Severus nodded hopelessly._

Looking at Lily, she watched him, waiting for him to reply. Severus knew that the more time he spent with her, the harder it would be for him to accept the fate that awaited her. "What do you think it is?" she asked again, looking to the comatosed women as to break their eye contact. "It's an ancient curse. Extremely dark. I've seen it only once before, and whoever did this….They knew what they were doing, to say the least," Severus heard himself say, bringing his own attention back to the women on the bed. "Oh," Lily said, as if she'd been hoping for something a little easier to fix. "Do you know how to?..." She began, but trailed off as Severus shook his head. Silence. Giving her one last glance, Severus said, "I might be able to find out, though...Tell Esmé, I had to leave. I'll get back to her soon, I have an idea I want to look into." Severus said, tightening his traveling cloak around himself more as he turned and left. Severus was sure he heard Lily say faintly, "Oh, okay," as he left.

 **A/N:** I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter?! As the story continues, it'll slowly advance from simply setting the background and such into the plot as this chapter demonstrated, but as we move towards that, the importance of all the background and story set-up will become more and more evident! Thanks for reading, and comments and inquiries are always welcomed! Thanks again!


	13. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Sirius ran through the woods, his feet moving faster than his mind as he shot red flares from his wand. A jet of green shooting back at him, Sirius just barely ducked before the jet flew right over his shoulder and faintly skimmed his ear. The witch's cackling sounded from ahead, and Sirius ran even faster. He was determined to catch her–He had to. For Harry's sake. The witch Sirius chased ran in an almost teasing manner, galloping through the woods gleefully. Her eyes dark and hair not unlike Sirius', she looked rejuvenated from the play. Another shot at his feet, this time Sirius jumped back, cursing loudly. The other aurors behind Sirius also aimed their wands for the witch. "Crucio!" She screamed harshly, her wand pointed to someone behind Sirius. Sirius blocked the curse. The woods they ran in, of which Sirius didn't know the name, were dense, the aspen trees laid closely together so that Sirius had to dodge them as he ran through. "Come and catch me, Cousin!" She said tauntingly. Sirius' teeth gritted as he ran, trying all the harder to do just that at her words.

She seemed to relish at the chase, her expression amused and malic as the large set of aurors aimed for her life. And then, a light streamed passed Sirius, right towards the woman. Though still far in front of the rest, the woman faltered, tripping as she moved to avoid the attack. Catching her fall as Sirius came closer still, the smile faltered from her lips. Close enough to see the woman's face, Sirius saw the familiar heavy eyes and sunken bone structure in the woman's appearance. She was thinner than the last time he'd seen her, Azkaban had clearly done a number on her, Sirius thought even as he ran towards her, shouting every curse that came to mind. But still, even in the midst of her trip-up, the witch blocked and dodged Sirius' every move. More colors of light flew passed Sirius from behind as his fellow aurors continued to aim for the woman. Still not close enough to get a clear shot of her, Sirius elongated his strides, desperate to get to the woman. Still, she blocked his offense, even as Sirius came closer and closer to her. "You can do better than that!" She jeered aggressively to Sirius. Another shot towards her, the woman flung her wand back in return, almost lazily, "Avada kedavra," her long dark curls of hair flipping back arrogantly.

"Don't be lazy, Bella," Sirius provoked, doubling his wand work so that he moved twice as fast, his movements almost angelic. The woman laughed further at this as she began to not only fire towards Sirius but at those that gathered by his sides as they caught up. "Stupefy!" A witch from behind Sirius called. Not daring to look away from his cousin, Sirius knew Ainsley had thrown the spell. Blocking this, Sirius took the open opportunity, casting another curse the woman's way. This time though, the curse grazed her flesh, knocking the woman off her balance in just the slightest. The woman whipped her wand at Sirius and he shouted, "Give it up!" She didn't. Wouldn't. More flicks of the wrists, attacking and blocking, and then she called humoredly, "Take this as a warning, Cousin." Sirius called out once more, "Stupefy," but his words were drowned out by the blinding light which shot towards Sirius and the scattered aurors. Sirius advanced through the light. "Next time, I kill. Or He will." She announced, with a tone of finality. The light vanishing, suddenly, Bellatrix Lestrange was gone. Swearing, Sirius kicked a near tree in anger as the rest of the aurors' delayed attacks hit where Bellatrix had just stood. Caught up in his own self-loathing, unable to believe he'd let his cousin escape yet again, Sirius hadn't even considered the woman's words until the bright lights which still flashed behind his eyes ceased. Palming his eyes, adjusting them to the dim light around, it was only once Sirius looked back to the other aurors that Ainsley said concernedly, "Who's ' _He'_?"

Tossing yet another book to the floor, Severus continued to pour over the remaining dozen of nicely bound books before him. Books titled like "Mastering the Dark Arts" by Ernie Mclaughlin and "The Dark Arts: The Offense Guide To Winning Any Duel" by Sandra Evelstein, among these books, several more sat scattered by Severus' feet. His fingers barely scraping the paper, Severus flipped through the books before him full speed, skimming the text with impressive skill. At this for almost two hours, Severus only stopped when the familiar misty blue outline of the phoenix appeared before his desk. "Severus, meet me outside the Great Hall at your earliest convenience," said the automated voice of Dumbledore through the blue mist. Watching the misty phoenix as it disappeared, Severus stood, secretly glad to be given a reason to stop. Though it was nothing new, Severus was exhausted. Flicking his wand as he stood, the books around the room, of which he'd been analysing, reorganize themselves in a neat stack upon Severus' desk. Wondering the time as Severus made his way through the castle, Severus rubbed his arm in discomfort against his robes. The halls appeared quiet, and dinner must've been at least a few hours ago, Severus deduced, as he figured it must be past midnight by now. Entering the entrance hall of the castle, Dumbledore stood in a violet traveling cloak. Smiling as he saw Severus, Severus drew out his wand and apparated his own traveling cloak, realizing they wouldn't be staying indoors to discuss whatever it was Dumbledore needed of Severus. "Good evening, Severus. I hope I didn't wake you?" Dumbledore greeted once Severus reached speaking distance from the man. "No," Severus answered simply, fastening his traveling cloak around his body. Dumbledore smiled once more as he nodded, "Good, good. Well, we have some things I must burden you with, even in this late hour!" Only nodding, Severus followed Dumbledore out of the castle, down the steps and onto the grass. The two walked in silence for some time, Severus surveying Dumbledore in his peripheral view as they did so. "I know, this all seems most mysterious, Severus. Only a little longer and I'll explain," Dumbledore said eventually as they made their way not out of the grounds but towards the Forbidden Forest. Only beginning to speak once they'd reached the forest outskirts, Dumbledore said casually, "Your mark, has it been hurting?" Looking surprised by this question, Dumbledore continued to look pressingly to Severus. "My–?" Severus began. "Yes, the dark mark, Severus?" Dumbledore nodded patiently. Nodding shortly, Severus said, "A bit, yes. Nothing unusual, though…." Dumbledore's lips thinning, apparently from Severus' response, he continued to lead the way deeper into the forest. Stepping over the large tree roots, Dumbledore lifted his cloak as he did so as to avoid the fabric catching. "Why?" Severus asked, curiously. Stopping in the middle of a clearing, Severus followed suit and came to a stop behind Dumbledore. More silence. Severus could hear the wind harshly blowing the trees around them, sounds of howls and moans from farther within the forest sounded as well. "Albus?" Severus said cautiously. "Muffliato," Dumbledore said, flicking his wand effortlessly as he said, quietly, "You've heard nothing, then, I presume? From your fellow Death Eaters?" Severus' body stiffened from the tone of which Dumbledore spoke to Severus. There was no debate of the disdain in Dumbledore's voice as he said _"Death Eaters"_. "Don't you think I'd have told you if I had?" Severus said, grudgingly. Dumbledore watched Severus, firmly. He was doubtful. "No, I haven't," Severus said lowly, not hiding the annoyance in his voice. Severus was offended by Dumbledore's skepticism. Nodding, Dumbledore continued, as if deciding he believed Severus, "There's been a mass break out in Azkaban," Dumbledore said seriously. "When?" Severus said levelly. "Mere hours ago, I only just now received word from Shackbolt. The aurors have been chasing them down all night." Dumbledore said, his eyes drifting passed Severus and around the clearing they stood in.

"Who?" Severus asked, his voice sounding raspier than he'd anticipated. _What did this mean? Was it beginning? Was the second war Dumbledore had promised in the approaching future?_

"Rockwood, Bellatrix, Mulciber, Pettigrew, and Dolohov, to name a few," Dumbledore said, still carefully watching Severus. Severus' face paled as he asked, "The works of the Dark Lord?" Dumbledore exhaled as he answered, "Possibly, but unlikely. I had imagined he would need longer to recuperate after what happened with Harry that night in Godric's Hollow..."

"But it's possible?" Severus asked again. Dumbledore held Severus' gaze before he nodded. "I need you to find out more. Converse with your Death Eater companions, find out if he's trying to come back."

"What if he is?" Severus asked, his stomach turning from the thought. Everything was happening so fast, Severus thought he'd have years before this began. "Than, I fear, we must begin training Harry Potter." Dumbledore said gravely, as if he'd just sentenced the boy to death.

Lily valued the moments of silence in her home, given the scarcity of them. Still early, an eerie morning fog had set over Britain. In the kitchen, taking in the silence before Harry woke and before the long day of work ahead of her, Lily drank her tea peacefully, staring out the kitchen window. There was a beauty to the eeriness, as if all the world was protected by the fogs cover. Harry would be up any minute now, Lily knew, checking the time. As if on cue, a voice called "Mum?" from up the stairs. "In the kitchen, Darling," Lily called back with a small smile. She loved the predictability of her mornings. Lily listened, the familiar sound of his feet patting the wood steps on his way down, the sound sounded just as it had since he'd been a few years old. Smiling at Harry as he entered the kitchen, his hair was messy and glasses crooked. He looked so like James, Lily thought as she looked at him. More and more with each new day, too. Lily liked how thinking this wasn't painful as it once had been. As sad as it was that James would never see what became of Harry, Lily had learned to accept the unfortunate turn of fates long ago. "Morning, sleepy head," Lily said affectionately, kissing his head as he dropped into the chair beside her. "Toast?" She asked, standing and ruffling Harry's hair with another smile. Pushing her hands away lightly, Harry whined childishly, "Stop it, stop it." Laughing Lily repeated, "Toast?"

Harry nodded, "Please."

As Lily brought out the marmalade and toasted the bread, she said, "Could you go check for Botany?" Botany was their frail, weather beaten owl who often times didn't make it passed the front porch with the mail. The commutes, apparently too draining for him, ever since Lily could remember, he'd taken to only doing his delivering service halfway. Nodding again, Harry left the kitchen, still blurry eyed, dragging his feet dramatically as he left and muttering something like, "Ron's owl doesn't do this..." Lily laughing softly at his theatrics, Harry returned within seconds, setting the Daily Prophet upon the table as he sat back down. Placing the toast before him, Lily took her seat once more, sipped her tea, and picked up the Prophet.

And there it was, front and center of the paper, written in a large, bold font:

 _ **Mass Azkaban Breakout**_

 _By Rita Skeeter_

Lily's stomach twisted tightly.

She glanced to Harry who ate his toast contently, staring out the window just as Lily had done earlier that morning, unaware of everything bad in the world. Lily began to read the article with one last cautious glance to her son.

 _Late last night it was reported, by an anonymous source, that Azkaban suffered a mass breakout. Reportedly losing some ten plus inmates, when asked about the accusation, one Ministry official, who wishes to remain nameless, said "Rumors, mere rumors. If there'd been a break out, the public would be the first to know, have no doubt." The inside source , however, confided, "Of course *Blank* would say that, it's his department on the line! They're the ones who should be blamed for this catastrophe!" It's no surprise, following the recent years of strife, that the Ministry would withhold such information. Likely in denial, it seems fear, as the magical community knows, is the most powerful force for denial there is._

 _The names of the escaped continue to be hidden, due to the secretive nature of the breakout, as well as the embarrassment the auror department and Ministry are going through. Nonetheless, one name that seems to be reoccuring in the various lists of the escaped is that of Bellatrix Lestrange. Lestrange an avid follower of You-Know-Who back in the day, it's no wonder the recent breakout is causing such a ripple of fear through Britain. One civilian said, very distressed, "It's awful, isn't it? She [Lestrange] is mad! I remember when she was free–Out torturing those poor Longbottoms! It's just awful!" As if that's not bad enough, another source said, as he stood just outside the Auror Department within the Ministry of Magic, "We've been a mess, all morning. The entire department is in chaos, half our aurors were out all night, trying to chase down the escaped convicts. It's a mistake, on our part, that will need much mending. We only hope it can be resolved sooner rather than later."_

 _A mess indeed–the aurors and administrative within the department bustling about, raised voices from within could be heard, even from outside the department. Several people of the Auror Department refusing to speak on the matter, when one was asked if this has anything to do with You-Know-Who, the woman said that she could not say, adding, as a side note, "But it's not out of the question–"_

Lily stopped reading, unable to handle any more, panic rose in her. Harry who had fetched himself a glass of milk, sipped the milk as he read a book he'd retrieved from the drawing room. Looking at her son, Lily felt as if she couldn't breath. _What did this mean?_

 **A/N:** Thanks for reading!


	14. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

"Due to the recent change in circumstances, which I'm sure you all know of, we've decided to begin this program sooner than expected," Severus drew out, looking upon the aurors in and fellow Aid Program leaders: Esmé, Randall, and Lily….

Severus continued, elaborating further, "As such, we'll have one healer and one potions master on the field at all necessary times, with the remaining Aid leaders stationed here. From this moment further, I expect only the best. Lessons on what materials all aurors and Aid leaders will be expected to know fluently will begin as of tomorrow morning, seven sharp. This is to be considered mandatory." Severus glanced down to the papers he held. His eyes trailed the notes he'd scribbled, Severus appeared to have covered everything. Looking to the back of the room where Fudge, Dumbledore, Bartemius Crouch, and Rufus Scrimgeour all stood, watching Severus, Severus said, politely "Minister, do you have anything to add?"

Smiling wearily, Fudge shook his head, looking to either of his sides, inviting those he stood with to add something but no one did. Fudge, Severus observed, looked like he had aged about ten years since their last meeting. The stress of recent events had evidently gotten to him.

Severus nodded once it was clear none of the others had anything to say and said, "That is all, than. Note, all Auror Aid leaders need to meet with me before they leave." The entire room stared at him, as if uncertain if they really could leave. And then, similar to the children at Hogwarts, all began to rise at once, conversations igniting as they did so.

Lily stood, exchanging a look of lassitude with Healer Sinclair, they began to move towards Severus in sync. Holden Randall trailed some ways behind them as they did so. Part of Lily felt bad for the man, Sinclair's hostility towards him so bluntly obvious. Randall had been quite friendly if also a tad bit annoying when they'd first met and Lily wondered what events had occurred between Sinclair and him to make both act as they were. Severus noticing as the group approached, he said, more to Healer Sinclair than the rest, "We'll wait for the room to clear before we begin." It frustrated Lily how Severus did this—Always spoke to Healer Sinclair first, as if she was more worthy of his equal attention than Lily and Randall. It didn't seem to be one-sided either Lily learned as she spent more and more time with the two. Healer Sinclair did just the same, if presumingly a little less intentionally. As Lily watched the two talk, suddenly an idea occurred to her, and Lily wasn't sure whether or not to laugh or cringe at the thought. Was it possible, Lily wondered, watching them both closer, that they were together?...The idea seemed ludicrous! Try as she could, Lily couldn't picture Severus Snape _dating_ ….The idea was foreign-feeling and the amusement Lily got from it felt childish in every regard. _Or perhaps, maybe, they'd seen one another in the past?_ Lily questioned. The thought made her uncomfortable, though why Lily wasn't sure. She supposed it was because the Severus she had known had only been a boy. In all their time together as friends, he'd never shown interest in any of the girls at Hogwarts, let alone made to date any of them. When 'd been younger, Lily had frequently thought to herself that Severus was more interested in books than he possibly could be in any other human. She hadn't even considered the possibility that Severus had intimate relationships beyond friendships.

The room beginning to finally clear out, Lily watched the floor as to not nervously smile at her thoughts. For some reason, Lily was embarrassed by these thoughts, as if it concerned her in any way who or what Severus did in his personal life.

Putting the thoughts aside to the best of her ability once the room had fully cleared, Lily watched as Severus flicked his wand so that all the chairs but seven remained. The seven remaining chairs proceeded to formulate themselves into a circle in the center of the room. Everyone taking a seat, Lily watched Sinclair from the corner of her eyes as they sat, unsure why the thought of Sinclair and Severus brought her so much intrigue. Lily doubted it was true, although, it wouldn't surprise her if it was. Sinclair was beautiful _and_ highly intelligent, after all….Lily's smile faltered. "I have a few text references and articles which examine the basic properties of any common antidote as well as some on the distinct qualities of the bezor that I expect you to all become familiar with," Lily listened to Severus say as he handed out an array of articles and text references. Leafing through the material, Lily glanced to Sinclair who had looked back to Severus as she said, "Is this what you'll be introducing to the aurors tomorrow?" Nodding, Severus said, still conveniently avoiding Lily's gaze as he looked between the rest of the group, "Yes, it's become clear to me that it'll be wise to address the basics first. Many of the aurors seem to be lacking in the fundamental concepts of healing and potion-making." There was a mild edge to his voice as if the aurors' lack of knowledge overtly made Severus think less of them. The tone was familiar, Lily realized, just the same as when they had been in their school days. "As such, we'll need to be ready to apply these anecdotes when needed. Because of this, we've," Severus motioned to Fudge, Dumbledore, Crouch, and Scrimgeour, "Decided one healer and one potions master will remain here, as previously stated, to assist incoming aurors. The other two will be traveling with the aurors, onto the field."

"This means," Crouch said, speaking for the first time that evening, "Those on the field will have to be highly adept in duelling." Fudge nodded in agreement gravely, while Scrimgeour's expression was distant and seemingly dark.

"I'll do it," Sinclair offered, looking to Crouch specifically as she spoke. Nodding, Fudge said, "Yes, yes I think that'd be best….And Snape, I suppose?" Severus exchanged a look with Dumbledore before Dumbledore said, "I think Randall would be better suited." Fudge looked surprised by this and as did Sinclair. "Surely Severus is more qualified," She said with an uncertain laugh. Lily wondered if this was because Sinclair didn't want to work with Randall or because she _did_ want to work with Severus, or perhaps both? Not that Lily held any of this against Sinclair, she had to remind herself. "Dumbledore, I must agree with Esmé," Fudge said, knitting his brows as he watched Dumbledore. "I'm _perfectly_ qualified," Randall said defensively, straightening up as if to prove so. No one bade these words much notice, though. "Severus?" Sinclair questioned, looking to him. "I agree with Dumbledore, I'd be much more of use here than in the field," Severus said, not meeting anyone but Dumbledore's gaze. Lily found the entire exchange extremely peculiar, so much so, she hadn't even realized what this would mean for her: She would be working with Severus–alone. "Crouch, what do you think?" Fudge questioned. Like Fudge, Crouch appeared to be surveying Dumbledore curiously. Finally conceding, Crouch said, "I believe Professor Snape knows what he is and isn't capable of. If he chooses to stay back and let Randall take the spot, that is what will happen. Is this what you'd like, Snape?" Lily watched Severus closely as he concurred with a stiff nod. It looked almost painful for him. Did he really dread working with Lily that much? Lily couldn't help but be hurt not for the first or last time by Severus Snape.

When Lily got home, she was surprised to find not only Remus there, but Sirius too. Sirius looked tired as he talked with Remus. Placing her bag on the nearest chair as she entered the kitchen, Lily said, "What have we here?" Whatever she'd just walked in on, it was obviously important from the expressions upon their faces. "Sirius? Remus?" Lily said, a little agitatedly. Their expressions were grim. Suddenly, Lily felt sick. What was wrong? Was someone dead? Harry?! Was he alright?

"Everything's fine, Lil," Sirius said, with a surprisingly gentle tone. Remus nodded, "Harry's fine." As if reading her mind. Relief filled her body. "What is it than?," She questioned, more aggressively as they'd just scared her half to death. Something was unmistakably wrong, she knew from their expressions. Lily had known them for long enough to know how to read them. "We're worried," Sirius began. "About Harry. And you,' Remus elebortated. Exhaling, understanding what they were referring to, Lily nodded, "The breakout." Both nodded. Lily stepped more into the space, flicking her wand so that the door flew shut with a silenced slam. She couldn't risk having Harry overhear them. "Is it 'Him'?" She asked, sounding braver than she felt. "We don't know," Sirius exhaled. "We doubt it, but…."

"It could be," Lily finished. Sirius nodded in return, not meeting her eyes with his. "They're worried about it too, at the Ministry," She added. She'd figured the Ministry had only been worried because it had been on their watch that the prisoners had escaped but now, looking upon Remus and Sirius' darkened faces, Lily felt fear upsurge once more. How it could be He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, Lily didn't dare ask. Everyone thought he was dead; Lily thought he was dead. And yet, it was still a fear, even now, after he'd supposedly been defeated. "Yes, they are. They're trying to keep it quiet but, who else could do something like this!" Sirius said, angrily. "I think we need to keep calm until we have a reason to worry," Remus sighed. "For Harry's sake. We can't risk uprooting him, scaring him, on a whim."

"A whim?" Sirius said, "Moony, I told you about Bellatrix!"

Acknowledging this, Remus said, "They," Meaning the 'Death Eaters' "Could have worked together to get out, there's no guarantee–"

"'No guarantee,'" Sirius spat, more aggressively than intended.

"Sirius, calm down, really," Lily interjected, not wanting him to wake Harry. "Even if it's not him. _They_ could be coming for Lil–for Harry!" Sirius said firmly. Remus looked away, considering this. "What happened with Lestrange?" Lily asked, hesitantly. She hated Bellatrix Lestrange more than the rest of the barbarous Death Eaters, if possible. Lestrange had tortured Frank and Alice, Lestrange had taken parents away from their child. And Lily knew, that could've been Harry. It scared her just as much as it enraged her.

Sirius explained the previous week to Lily in detail. How he'd been told about the outbreak, how he'd chased several of the escaped Death Eaters. He explained how he had let Bellatrix Lestrange escape, yet again. Lily could tell, as he mentioned the last part of the encounter, Sirius was still beating himself up over letting her escape. "I'm sure there was nothing else you could've done," Lily said, comfortingly. Sirius just shook his head, looking away. Lily looked to Remus who watched Sirius with just as much concern as she had been. "We'll put up more protections," Remus said at last. "Tonight," Sirius agreed. Lily nodded, "Okay." Together, the three stood around the house, murmuring one enchantment after the other. Small flashes of lights flew over the house and disappeared from there.

Lily went to bed that night with more worries than she knew what to do with. Thoughts of Severus Snape and the auror aid program in the far back of her mind, Lily didn't have time that night to ponder, as she had been previously, why Severus would ever agree to work alone with her. No, Lily's troubles laid with her son's. As they often seemed to be, these days, she noted. Lily didn't fall asleep until late that night, tossing and turning from her conversation with Sirius and Remus for most of the night.

In bed, safe and sound just down the fall, Harry Potter slept, unlike his mother, without a worry in the world. The scar on his forehead darkened with irritation, Harry shifted in bed, rubbing his scar discomfitingly though still fast asleep. For the pain of the scar wasn't enough to wake the young boy from his sleep, not when he was so content otherwise.

 **A/N:** Thanks for reading! I really appreciate all the lovely comments from the last chapter also so thank you!


	15. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Lily watched Severus from the corner of her eyes. Severus stood some few meters next to her, stirring the blood-replenishing potion occasionally as he added ingredients. Lily observed how Severus' eyes stayed in his own line of vision, never glancing her way as they worked together, Lily concocting the Essence of Dittany potion as they did so. The two worked in utter silence, to Lily's discomfort. Lily didn't like it so quiet, it felt as if it made the situation all the more strange. Both able to hear every sigh and cough the other made, able to hear the other curse as they messed up: this was mainly Lily's doing. Nonetheless, Severus hadn't said a word since they'd begun working and seemed used to the silence. Severus had always preferred silence. Lily recalled their frequent study sessions in the Hogwarts library, most of which had been not unlike now, she realized. Somethings never change apparently. "Don't forget the copper," Severus said after some time, glancing over to her work station. Trying not to be offended by his lack of confidence in her ability to brew a simple potion such as Essence of Dittany, Lily nodded respectfully, "Of course not." Something in her tone must have struck him poorly, as Severus looked up for a second, as if he was going to say more before he turned back to his own potion. Lily couldn't understand, for the life of her, why Severus showed such little faith in her. It wasn't as is she'd been incapable of properly brewing back in the day. In fact, in school, Lily was sure she had been the only one to even come remotely close to matching Severus' potion-making skills. He's just being cautious, Lily told herself. After all, she had managed to somehow mess up the uncommon poisons potion….That had been a mess and dreadfully embarrassing. Especially as it was day one. But Severus had handled it well. Clearing her cauldron without a word, Lily had kept her head down as Severus had retrieved the necessary ingredients once more, handing them to her as Lily offered a timid, "Thank you. I'm so sorry about that…." Severus only nodded in acknowledgement, looking neither annoyed nor empathetic.

By mid noon, however, the efforts of the day begun to drag upon Lily. Having arrived at seven that morning, the lesson had gone on longer than Lily had previously thought it would. The lesson ending just past ten, Lily had barely gathered her stuff when she'd been called upon by Severus' beckon to begin work on the potions. As Severus had explained, they were first to brew the common remedy potions before advancing to the more uncommon and advanced potions, as the latter were in less frequently used.

By the time Lily had begun her third potion of the day, the room was thick with steam and smoke not for the first time. Severus having made to dissolve the fumes when they overrode the room, by the third potion Severus seemed to have given up on the trivial task. After all, it would only be a matter of time until the fumes returned. Stepping away from her potion at one point, Lily couldn't hold in her coughing any longer. Flicking her wand as she did so, suddenly the air was clear once more. Once she'd finished coughing, Lily glanced to Severus who said, his eyes still on the potion below him, "I didn't have time this morning to cast the enchantments which ensure the dissolution of excess fumes. I'll make sure to do so tomorrow."

"Oh, it's no problem, really. I understand." Severus looked up, meeting her gaze as he nodded shortly. Lily stepped forward back to her cauldron and said, "After all, I imagine you're a bit busy, given everything going on…." She looked hesitant as she said this. Severus seemed to consider this before he answered carefully, "Not any more than anyone else is, I presume." Severus couldn't tell if Lily's words were an implication for something deeper. Was she referencing the Azkaban breakout? Was she implying something about him? Or simply that he couldn't handle his share of work? Severus couldn't be sure. "Oh," Lily said softly, a little disappointed by his answer. Holding her gaze this time, Severus looked away only as he reached for his next ingredient. "I just thought with Hogwarts and all…." Lily said, continuing the conversation on her own. Why was she so persistent on talking? Severus thought, unsure how he'd keep her at a distance if she continued to be this talkative. "Hogwarts work….Well, it's...not exactly challenging. As I'm sure you can guess." Lily gave a nervous smile, "Ahh, hmm, some things really never change." Severus, who had been adamant to stay focused on the boiling concoction below him, paused. Looking over the space between them, Severus surveyed her in full for the first time since he knew not when. "By that, you mean?" He said at last, her smile faltered. "Only that you weren't exactly challenged there in our school days, either," Lily said, abruptly looking away, color moving to her face. Chancing a look towards Severus again, Lily was surprised to find a faint smile on his lips, although his eyes had dropped to the valerian root he cut, as to conceal this. Feeling a little more relaxed by this, this Lily realized, was the first time he'd shown any comfortability with her. The smile, however faint and hidden, was genuine. After all, Lily knew a genuine Severus Snape smile like few others. "Neither were you, as I recall." Severus said, surprising Lily. "Ohh, I'm not sure about that…." Lily said, modestly. Now most definitely smirking, Severus glanced at her as he said, his voice kinder than normal, "I am." There was no judgement in the sentence only a definence that made Lily's lips curl into a proud smile. "What of my skills now?" She asked, wanting to further the conversation, if only to better understand the man who she'd previously known so well. Severus was quiet although Lily knew he'd heard her. "That's hard to say," he said eventually, his tone reverted back to the usual low drawl. "You must have an opinion?" Lily prompted, daringly. Severus seemed to notice her intentions as he shook his head a little, amusedly. Lily who'd been cutting the cretan dittany proportionally caught Severus' gaze and raised a brow. Shaking his head further, looking away, Severus said, "As you managed to forget the billywig stings in an uncommon poisons potion…." Lily laughed. The sound seemed to startle Severus, though he offered a smile in return. "I'm a bit rusty, in all fairness." She exhaled, setting about stirring in the newest ingredients into her Essence of Dittany potion. "Hmm….why?" Severus asked, distractedly, measuring out his own potion's contents. "'Why'" Lily repeated, musing the question. The question was apparently more difficult than Severus had anticipated. Severus looked up again, thinking for a second he'd overstepped. "My son," Lily said after a small silence. "Ah," was all Severus could think to say. Severus did not notice as Lily checked his reaction at the mention of her and James' son, but he kept his face set nonetheless. "I barely have enough time for him, let alone a million extracurriculars…" She elaborated, shifting nervously. Lily could sense the change in Severus. "Why then, would you pursue this program? As I'm sure you know, this will be a highly–"

"I only meant, work–this–and Harry are rather time consuming." Severus didn't reply, but nodded reservedly. "I'm perfectly committed to this program," Lily continued, airily her eyes narrowed as she looked to Severus. Severus didn't look back as he said, "I hope so."

How one minute Severus reminded her so much of the boy she'd known and than the next moment became someone she didn't much like, Lily didn't know. Lily had figured the topic of Harry would be a touchy subject for Severus, given his paternity, but regardless, didn't see why it ought to matter. Severus had no right to still hold a grudge against James and even less of a right to carry that grudge onto her son. It wasn't Harry's fault James had been an awful bully to Severus! He had no right, Lily told herself, the room dead silent once again.

But than, part of Lily knew. It wasn't only about James. It was about her. She'd betrayed Severus….NO–no, she hadn't, Lily countered, remembering how their relationship had ended.

Mudblood.

Shaking her head, Lily silently winced at the memory. Still, Lily knew Severus had seen her relationship with James as a betrayal and had a feeling that would never change. Why, than, she wondered, did she want it to? She didn't want Severus to believe she'd betrayed him. Lily wanted Severus to like her, to look at her like he used to like when they'd been young. Lily realized, rather suddenly, she'd missed talking with him. Not the him that was shut off and cold, but the version she'd known. Not the version she'd met at the introduction meeting, but the version she'd just gotten a glimpse of for the first time in years.

But suddenly, he was gone. The rest of the day was quiet as neither had much more so say. Lily was tempted to yell at Severus but restrained herself, only because he was her superior in rank. She couldn't risk getting fired, not just to prove a point to some petty, stubborn git.

And yet, Lily saw more than a petty, stubborn git. Lily knew the Severus she liked was still in there, that day, if nothing else, had proved it.

Always five steps in front of him, Remus watched Harry closely as they wandered down Diagonal Alley. Stopping at every next display window, Harry smiled widely, marveling at the screaming books and hooting owls. Harry had always loved owls, ever since Remus could remember; especially snowy-owls. The only thing, that Remus could think of, that Harry liked more than snowy-owls were brooms. Taking an exceptionally longer amount of time to stare at the newest shiney broom in stock, it didn't take long for Remus to give in and enter the shop with Harry. Making to touch anything and everything, Harry spewed random facts about brooms proudly to the nearby children. The parents present smiled politely at Remus before their eyes fell to his scarred face and their smiles faded. Remus was used to this and only smiled back before looking away uncomfortably.

Keeping a hand on Harry's shoulder, as to not lose him in the crowded shop, Harry plunged from one broom to the next excitedly. As they did so, Remus noticed a boy that looked oddly familiar. Standing near Harry and Remus, as Harry talked with a girl his age about the broom's bristle type, the boy appeared to be arguing with a women who was undoubtedly his mother. Their appearances almost identical from the platinum blonde hair to the resting scowl, the woman's hair was long and flowy while the child's chin was sharp and pointed. Why the boy looked familiar, Remus couldn't place. He must've been Harry's age, at least. Maybe a friend from Harry's early parent-child learning classes? Remus wasn't sure. Either way, the boy was heated as he talked to his mother who conceded and nodded, looking neither embarrassed nor impressed by her child.

"Uncles Remus?" Harry said, drawing in Remus' attention. "Hm?" Remus murmured, looking to Harry. "Do you think Mum would buy me a new broom?" He asked, his hand which had tugged at Remus' clothes loosening, Harry's eyes were on the broom before him. Laughing, Remus said, "That's quite the tall order!"

"Is that a no?" He asked, his face saddening. Smiling warily, Remus ruffled Harry's hair and said, "I'd say so. Who knows though, your birthday is coming up, maybe I'll bring it up to her." His eyes gleaming, childishly, Harry smiled wider, "Please, please do! I bet with that new job she's being paid a load?!" Laughing, Remus said, "We'll see, Harry." Harry seemed to think he'd won though and said "Alright!" Remus watched as Harry returned to reading one of the books he'd taken from the near shelf: Quidditch Through the Ages. As Harry did so, however, Remus noticed something he'd never noticed before. As Harry read, he rubbed his forehead gruffly with a huff of air. Moving Harry's hand gently, Remus said, concernedly, "Hey, what's wrong?" Looking up in surprise, Harry just shook his head, "Nothing." Remus studied Harry for a moment, the boy carelessly returning to the book without a second thought to what he'd said. "Are you sure?" Remus pressed, his brows furrowing in concern. Rubbing his forehead again, right where his unusually shaped scar was, more out of habit this time, Harry nodded unconvincingly. "It's just been hurting a bit," Harry said, scrunching his face a little in disdain. Eyes creasing, Remus said, "Your scar? What do you mean? How so?" Lips pursed, Harry shrugged. "Harry?" Remus said, squeezing Harry's shoulder encouragingly. Exhaling dramatically Harry said, as Remus looked to him, "It's just been hurting—like a burning feeling."

"Since when?" Remus asked gently. Shrugging again, Harry replied, "Since last week." Trying his best to not look too concerned, as to not worry Harry, Remus nodded thoughtfully, "Hmm."

"It's never done this before either," Harry added. Remus could tell Harry had been wanting to share this for awhile by the way he spoke now. "Well, we'll take a trip to Apothecary. Maybe we can find something to help you," Remus suggested, smiling kindly to the child. Nodding, turning back to his book, Harry agreed to this.

Remus however couldn't help but feel uneasy by this news. He'd never heard of a scar hurting. Was this common for magical scars? Hopefully, Remus thought to himself. Making a note to tell Lily about this new discovery, Remus knew, deep down, this wasn't a good thing.

A/N: Hello! Well, that concludes the latest chapter in our story, what did everyone think? I hope everyone is happy with the slow, but sure, progression of Lily and Severus' relationship? I know it seems slow paced at times but in staying true to the characters, this is how I believe it should be. As you may have also picked up on, I'm slowly adding more complex layers and storylines into our story which I also hope everyone likes! As always thanks for reading!

-AlwaysLoveActually


	16. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

There was silence, abruptly. Remus stood in the dark, his wand pointed into nothingness. Sirius some metres away, his arm was aligned at shoulder length while his was wand directed in the opposite direction. Alice and Frank Longbottom, Dedalus Diggle, Edger Bones, Mad-Eye Moody, among the village locals, scattered the small village square. Each witch and wizard, ready for offense, they held their wands high; and all eyes were attentive. Red flames appeared from the darkness, flying directly at Mad-Eye, who deflected the attack with ease. Another flash of light approached, this time, Remus flicked his wand and discarded the threat. And then, all at once, the onslaught hit. Out of nowhere, the masked figures appeared. Revealing themselves, the village was in chaos. One against another, everyone aimed to hurt, to weaken, their opponents. Remus saw flashes of eyes, each opponent hidden behind their mask, it was shameful, he thought aimlessly: Hiding behind masks. Cowardly. Remus voicing this thought to the present Death Eaters, Sirius called out agreement.

"You heard Moony! It's pathetic!" Sirius laughed loudly, as he advanced on a tall Death Eater with long blonde hair; undoubtedly Lucius Malfoy. The Death Eater, Malfoy, only laughed wryly at Sirius' comment as he continued to hit Sirius with a cluster of attacks. Both Remus and Sirius moved with speed, maneuvering the field around them, sporadically they'd call to one another or the rest of the group they stood with, firing a random defense for the local folk. The rest of the Order of the Phoenix and local witches and wizards all did the same, helping one another out as they all fought side by side. Sirius provoking the Death Eaters than anything, he ruthlessly taunted them. Remus saw it before it even happened. Sirius' motions became stiffer, more lagged. His banter with the nearest Malfoy ceasing with a flash of Malfoy's wand, all of a sudden, Sirius was on the ground. At that same time, a bright light flashed, momentarily blinding Remus. And then, darkness once more.

It was as if the weather embodied the entirety of the Wizarding world: Dark, stormy, ominous, and unpredictable. The trees bowed deeply to the potent winds and the rain swerved in suit while thunder clapped harshly above.

It had been a long few weeks, since the escape within Azkaban. The Ministry still in a frenzy, the entire auror department was working over time, which consequently meant so was Lily. Nonetheless, not even one of the escaped prisoners had been recaptured as of yet. This alone, Lily knew, was what scared the Ministry more than anything. It wasn't only Lily who believed this, too. They all felt it, Sirius, Remus, Dumbledore, _everyone._ It wasn't that they were at war yet, but rather the fear that they all knew, soon they would be. And what was worse was that no one knew what exactly they were up against. Or at least, Lily didn't know. He-who-must-not-be-named dead, it appeared the dark forces were rallying on their own accord, ready for another war, regardless of their "fallen" leader. There had been attacks too. Always on small muggle or wizarding villages, it was if the Death Eaters were trying to send a message. They were back, and not without cause. They wanted conflict, war. Muggles and wizards alike were tortured, attacked, and exploited; the only difference was that wizards could defend themselves whereas muggles were virtually helpless. Aurors consistently reporting to the scenes, it was only ever with the Ministry, the Order of the Phoenix, or both's aid that the Death Eaters would scatter in suspended defeat. And in the cases of the muggle village attacks, it would take several hours afterwards for all the muggles to be properly obliviated.

It wasn't only the escaped prisoners and attacks that scared Lily, however. It was Harry. Her own son had hidden his pains from her: The growing aggravation of the peculiar lightning-shaped scar on his forehead. What did this mean? It couldn't simply be a coincidence of timing, with all that was going on in the world? Worse still, how come Harry hadn't told her? She was his mother and Harry had seen it fit to confide in Remus instead? Lily was grateful, nonetheless, that he had told Remus. Lily also reminded herself, Harry had only confided in Remus after being pressed on the subject. What if Remus hadn't noticed? Harry's pain could've gone on for who knows how long until he told someone of it….

"Mum!" Came Harry's voice, dismayed by Lily's wandering thoughts. Lily, in the drawing room upon the dark coloured lounge, Harry stood beside her expectantly. Looking abruptly down to him, his expression was twisted into a frown.

"You were supposed to come up and read me a story!" Harry said with a mix of hurt and accusation. Blinking in surprise, Lily said, apologetically, "Oh! I'm sorry, Sweetie! I got distracted." The papers which had rested around her fell to the floor as Lily made to stand. Checking the clock, Lily sighed restlessly. Distracted by the weather and lost in her thoughts, Lily still had much to do before the coming morning but refused to break a promise, especially one to Harry. She'd promised him a story and a story he would get. Leaving the fallen papers on the floor, they moved towards the staircase.

Her hand gently guided Harry as they trudged the steps, while his book was pressed tightly to his stomach by his crossed arms all the while. Into Harry's room, Harry immediately climbed into his covers where an evident stir in the bed told her, Harry had been waiting in bed for her to come up. Her heart sunk at this thought, painfully so. Harry leaving Lily room, Lily took her spot on the bed beside him. Harry's chin practically covered by his blankets, the book he'd held rested in Lily's hands now. Taking a moment, her eyes focused tiredly on the book for a pause, Lily begun to read aloud. One hand soothingly brushing Harry's hair occasionally as she read, Harry listened keenly with drowsy eyes.

Checking the time spontaneously as she read, Lily's mind continually drifted to the work that awaited her back on the lounge. Lily still had to review the notes Severus had instructed her to become familiar with by the next day, as well as rewrite her latest variant of a concoction Sinclair and her had been formulating in menas to revive the comatosed patient within St. Mungos. With that, Lily also had to make sure she was up to date with each potion they were to brew the next day, of which were each chosen based on the incoming flow of patients whom required immediate care. This was all work Lily never got around to, as within the next hour, she and Harry laid fast asleep, the book they'd been reading fallen on the floor and forgotten.

Lily was quiet that morning. Dark circles under her eyes, Severus immediately noticed, she was restless. Neither talked as they worked, Lily's mind was apparently preoccupied as she fidgeted over the potion below her. Lily and Severus had been working together for several weeks at this point, and although they scarcely talked, they had become more comfortable with one another. Working together in sync, they passed one another simultaneously as they cut and diced the numerous ingredients, occasionally passing one thing or another to each other without looking up. It was peaceful, Severus found, just as he liked things.

Even with the silence, Severus found himself immensely distracted by Lily's persistent heavy sighs and murmurs. "Mrs. Potter," Severus said eventually, his voice a drawl. Lily looked up with wide eyes. "Wh-hmm?" She said in uncertainty, her brows furrowed. "I can _hear_ you thinking," He remarked. Her expression of surprise faded, Lily said embarrassedly, "Oh, sorry!" Her eyes than dropped to the floor, in further unease. Severus surveyed her, hesitantly. Finally, he said, "That wasn't a complaint, simply an observation." Looking up again, Lily bit her lip nervously before she said, giving a small smile and sigh, "Right." A lull followed once more before Severus said, with slight amusement at her obtuseness, "That was an invitation to tell me what it is that is distressing you so, Mrs. Potter." Laughing lightly, Lily took a double take up to Severus, looking up from the cauldron she'd refocused on. It took her a minute to realize, Severus wasn't joking. His eyes steadily on her, a small smile played on his lips. Setting her jaw, Lily shook her head, "I don't want to trouble you with my own issues."

"Well, I fear, that if you don't get whatever it is off your mind, we might have to continue with your obvious mutterings and sighing." Severus said, without looking up as he began to cut the flitterbloom in hand. Laughing, a little more surely, Lily exhaled, "Really, I'm just….thinking aloud." Sighing exasperatedly, Severus said, "Must I beg the answer from you?" Laughing more, Lily smiled, shaking her head again, "It's hard to explain. Just with everything...with everything going on–the Azkaban break out, the attacks…." Severus watched her thoughtfully, nodding a little as to prompt her to continue. "It just all feels so dark suddenly. Everything just feels so dark," she laughed, humorlessly, looking away. When Lily looked back to Severus, his expression had shifted. His eyes, almost concerned, he looked otherwise aloof. Lily pursed her lips, "Aren't you glad you asked?"

"You need to worry less," Severus said, beginning to file through a pile of papers as he cleared his work space. Raising her brows, Lily said, in mock-defense, "Do I, now?" Not meeting her eyes as he glanced up, Severus nodded, "Yes." Lily sighed deeply and shrugged, "Easier said than done, in my experience." Clearing his cauldron with a flick of his wand, Severus conceded, rather seriously, "That it is. Nonetheless, you needn't worry about things that you cannot control; rather, you can only assure that you react in a way that is beneficial." Lily, a wide smirk on her lips, she said, her eyes fully on Severus' back as he put back ingredients in a near shelf, "My, my, how philosophical." Severus peering over his shoulder, raised his brows, "I try." Lily suppressed a smile and said levelly, "I can tell." Severus only bowed his head in acknowledgement, before he continued, indicating the potion she was brewing, "We'll need to be out in an hour, will you be done by then?" Nodding, Lily replied, "Yeah, I should be done shortly." Nodding in finality, Severus showed that he needed to leave before doing so, leaving Lily alone to finish her last potion of the morning.


	17. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Too stunned to feel much more than confusion, Remus blinked fiercely as white spots in his vision flashed. Squinting his eyes, Remus tried to survey the scene. Unable to immediately identify the figures around him, his vision still readjusting, he pointed his wand out unsurely. He could see a body, not far from where he stood. Rushing over as he realized it was Sirius, Remus frantically checked the man's pulse.

Alive.

Relief flooded Remus while the numbness in his cheeks faded ever so slightly. The rest of the village was still in chaos and it wasn't until Remus finished performing a variety of precautionary spells upon Sirius to assure his health and pulled the man's limp body off to the side of the battle that Remus realized what the white flash had been. Dumbledore had arrived.

Casting spells left and right, Dumbledore took on five Death Eaters at once with apparent ease. Even in his own surprise, Remus couldn't help but be impressed. However, no sooner had Remus begun to marvel, a jet of red flew towards him. Barely deflecting the attack, Remus was pulled back into the banter of duelling.

The synchronization between each dueler was aesthetic. Each dueler's arms elegantly slashed back and forth between one another as they danced in circles, large flames of varying colors filled the air between one figure to the next.

Not soon enough and yet all too abruptly, the last death eater fled and the battle was over. Dumbledore looked swiftly around the scene, as to make sure the opposition truly had fled for the night. Once he'd determined that only their allies remained, he looked to the local witches and wizards, of whom repeatedly praised him for his assistance in battle. Various aurors also approaching Dumbledore, Dumbledore lowered his voice and said authoritatively as he turned to Remus and the frail but alive Sirius, "Gather the Order together at location Orion, immediately." Both Remus and Sirius, after exchanging a quick look, nodded and left with two _pops_ split seconds apart

The sun which had risen by this time was shadowy and subtle and left the remaining allies in sustained darkness. Sirius and Remus meanwhile reconvened within number 12 Grimmauld place. Remus followed Sirius into the kitchen without a word, both men in shock. It was happening, or rather _something_ was happening. The order of phoenix hadn't been called upon since Voldemort's first supposed demise and neither Sirius or Remus questioned the seriousness of the situation before them. Both men sent out patronus messages, calling upon as many former members that they could recall. Within minutes, figures began to emerge from the shadows near the building entrance.

It had begun.

War.

Lily had only just finished reviewing the day's lesson when she got the message: _Meet at location Orion, immediately. Dumbledore's orders._ Nervousness filled her body. Hastily grabbing the stacks of paper which laid on her desk, Lily fumbled to open the door with the papers in arms. Nonverbally opening the door, Lily rushed from her office. Alby would have to take over for her. The rest of the auror aid department preoccupied, Severus had left some minutes before in equal haste. For what, Lily knew not.

It took longer than Lily had hoped to find Alby and fill him in on the potions lesson for that day, but no sooner had she done so, Lily left the building, only stopping to tell Sinclair (her second in command supervisor) that she had to leave early for a personal emergency.

Number twelve Grimmauld place was just as Lily remembered it: dark, dusty, and filled with Slytherin colors, beliefs, and trophies. The kitchen, where everyone called upon had gathered, was busy with noise. People who didn't usually see one another reacquainting, new and old members met, old friends embraced and everyone shared their suspicion as to why they were there.

Pushing through the people, Lily let out a breath of relief when she found Remus and Sirius. Rushing towards them, she murmured fearfully, "What's happened? Is it true? They're saying He's _back._ " Remus shook his head in uncertainty, "We're not sure, Dumbledore instructed us to gather everyone."

"We've just got back from another village attack," Sirius said informatively, his voice low as he looked around the room suspiciously. "Another?" Lily emphasized distressedly as she furrowed her brows empathetically. Nodding, Sirius looked as if he wanted to say more but was interrupted by the arrival of Dumbledore. The room fell silent and Dumbledore said, "Everyone, please settle down. We have a lot to cover, I fear." A stream of murmurs followed this announcement. Dumbledore continued on, raising his voice only just enough, "I, like many others, believe we on the brink of another war," More outburst erupted, "It is because of this, we must prepare. We must begin rallying our allies, standing our ground, and fighting as a united front."

"Albus, what are we up against?" Molly Weasley asked, agitatedly.

"We can handle a few bloody Death Eaters," another man, an auror, declared arrogantly. "Can't you see, it's more than Death Eaters," Kingsley Shacklebolt said in his signature low and rumbling voice. "Like what? What are we facing?" Lily spoke up, straightening her back as she did so. "I'm not sure. As it is, in a matter of minutes, I'll get confirmation whether or not my suspicions ring true," Dumbledore answered, looking from one familiar face to the next as he spoke. "What're your suspicions than?" Mundungus Fletcher spat, blatantly. Surveying Mundungus, Dumbledore repeated, "I don't want to alarm any of you of something that may not be true. In a few minutes–"

"It's Voldemort, right?" Sirius said, raising his voice to be heard over the other murmuring voices. "How could it be? He's dead," Molly interjected, as Arthur leaned forward and added, "His Death Eaters might simply be following out _His_ beliefs?" Many nodded to this in agreement. "You think it's 'Him' again, don't you Albus?" Remus said, his voice level and head bowed ever so slightly, as if in remorse at prospect of Voldemort returning.

Before Dumbledore could answer, a creak sounded by the kitchen entrance and everyone's heads flew sharply to the kitchen archway. From the darkness, a figure emerged: Severus Snape. Sirius stood, his wand out. A few followed suit, less certainly. Looking almost amused by this, Severus cocked a brow, daring Sirius to fire as their eyes briefly met. Breaking contact with Sirius, Severus looked to Dumbledore, his face regaining it's stoic composure as he gave Dumbledore a short nod. Sirius' wand still out, he only sat back down once Lily set her arm on him, drawing him back to his seat. The rest who'd raised their wands were wise enough to do so as well. Severus ignored them all, regardless. Or at least, all but Lily. Perfectly aware she was there, that she was in this too, he found it infuriating that Dumbledore would let her attend such a meeting given her and her son's circumstances. Nonetheless, Severus' eyes remained on Dumbledore. Exhaling wistfully, Dumbledore said, looking back to Severus, "Any other news?" Severus paused and than said, carefully, "There's more, but I recommend we talk... _afterwards_ about it."

Dumbledore nodded, redirecting his attention to the rest of the group.

As Severus looked into the room more, he observed how the entirety of the Order sat facing where Dumbledore stood. Dumbledore continued to watched Severus closely. Severus stared right back at him once more. "There are rumors," Dumbledore said at last, looking back to the majority of the group, "That Voldemort–" everyone but Remus and Lily flinched at the name, "Is returning. As to whether or not these rumours are true remains to be seen. However, we must all proceed with caution. Ranks need to be formed, and we all must help one another when needed."

"How do you know this?" Lily asked, conspicuously glancing to Severus. "Just because _he,"_ Sirius begun, raising his voice as he pointed aggressively to Severus with his finger, "Says so doesn't make it true. He's probably in cohorts with his Death Eater friends _._ " Dumbledore looked disapprovingly to Sirius as he said, "Severus is just as much dedicated to _our_ cause as you, Mr. Black, and I won't have anyone thinking otherwise." Severus' lips curled in amusement as he watched Sirius grow still at Dumbledore's words. Sirius obviously had more to say about Severus and looked ready to say this much until Lily once again drew him back, her eyes flashing warningly as she looked to Sirius. Severus, his stomach twisting as he watched this exchange, looked away stiffly. "Conflict within our own ranks is unacceptable," Severus heard Dumbledore spiel as he looked to the ground momentarily before his eyes flickered towards Lily. Severus took a double take. Lily was looking right back at Severus, to his confusion and surprise. Her eyes stared at him for only a split second before she looked down to her clasped hands which rested on the table in front of her.

"Since when is he in the Order?" Lily whispered as she looked to Remus, turning her back to where Severus stood in the kitchen archway. Moistening his lips and glancing to Sirius who listened in on the conversation, Remus replied, his voice barely audible, "I'm not sure, but he was there at the castle the night James….He was with the rest of the Order than, that's all I know."

"Right git, he shouldn't be here," Sirius grumpled, furiously. Remus only gave Sirius a weary shrug. "He was in the Order back than?" Lily questioned, her lips barely moving, back still to Severus' direction. Nodding, Sirius said, "Weaseled his way in, sometime before." Shooting a disapproving look at Sirius she said defensively, "He's not the enemy." Sirius gave an unamused laugh at this and said, "I'm not so sure about that." Lily rolled her eyes and glanced towards Severus. It was strange seeing him in the setting of an Order meeting. Lily had come accustomed to seeing him over boiling cauldrons or stacks of papers and books–never at an Order meeting though. Part of Lily felt guilty because she too secretly wondered if he belonged there. Lily wasn't certain he'd ever been directly involved in Voldemort's fight, but even she couldn't deny that that had been the direction he had been headed. And now? To have him attend a meeting for an organization solely based on countering those beliefs? It seemed odd.

Realizing all too late she had been staring at him, Severus glanced towards her, double-taking when he saw her eyes on him. Lily held his gaze, unable to straighten her thoughts about the man. Lily deeply exhaled in defeat and decided that staring at him wouldn't give her the answers she wanted and so Lily looked down to her clasped hands which had red marks from the intense pressure she'd been holding them.

Lily was glad when the meeting finally ended. After all, she could only handle so much strategy planning in a single sitting. The plan, however loose, was set, and so they left. One by one, people trailed from the house. It had been decided that the Order would split into rotational groups and alter and distribute between evident Death-Eater related attacks. Sirius, Lily, and Shacklebolt had been assigned as one such group. Remus was to begin recruiting the werewolves as soon as possible. Dumbledore also informed the group that Hagrid had already begun rallying giants and centaurs, hence why he hadn't been able to attend the meeting.

Lily left the house feeling both anxious and determined. She _had_ to protect Harry. Lily knew, as she left number twelve Grimmauld Place, she'd do whatever it took to make sure no Death Eater or akin took from her or anyone else ever again.

They would win this time, once and for all.


	18. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

"Where's uncle Remus?" Harry sighed as he dramatically threw up his arms. "He's away. For work," Lily answered, fastening her light overcoat as she spoke."Since when does Uncle Remus work?" Harry questioned suspiciously, his brows creased deeply. Lily paused, glancing up to Harry as she straightened her overcoat and brushed it down. Harry was quick. "He's recently come upon it," Lily supplied, neither lying nor elaborating. Harry seemed to think about this for a second before he nodded slowly, accepting the answer hesitantly. "So, I'm going to stay with you today?" Harry asked, following closely behind Lily as she exited the house and began down the garden path. "Yes, well sort of," Lily said, providing an encouraging smile. "'Sort of'?" Harry repeated. Lily turned left onto the pavement and looked back to Harry with an outstretched hand as she said, "I'll explain when we're there, okay?" Harry nodded, reluctantly. Harry's hand in hers, Lily stopped, and they disappeared. _Pop._

Lily's hand remaining securely around Harry's, not willing to risk lose him in the busy space, Lily led Harry through the vast chambers of the Ministry of Magic. Harry's eyes were wide as they traveled through the building, reminding Lily of the first time she had taken him to Diagon Alley where he'd worn the exact same expression. Even despite the age difference between then and now, Lily saw the same look of wonder in his eyes. Lily couldn't help but laugh as Harry gawked and asked eagerly question after question. Lily told him of the departments and offices as he asked and pointed to one closed door or another.

When Lily reached the Department of Magical Law Enforcement floor, Lily said, " _This_ is the floor I work on." Harry smiled broadly, obviously impressed, "Really?". Lily nodded and confirmed, "Really." As Lily lead Harry down the floor, people here and there took notice, greeting Harry kindly. After they entered the Auror Department, Lily drew Harry towards her office where more people greeted them as they made their way forward. "Lily," Healer Sinclair said brightly, waving Lily down. "Healer Sinclair," Lily greeted, feeling Harry fall back in step by her side, nervously. "Severus is out today, so I'll be overseeing today's Auror Aid lesson," Sinclair revealed, her eyes falling on Harry once she reached where Lily stood. Raising her brows, Sinclair looked to Lily, questioningly. "Healer Sinclair, this is my son, Harry," Lily introduced, stepping aside and nudging Harry forward towards Sinclair. Sinclair looked to Harry, addressing him politely and offering out her hand, "Harry, I've heard a lot about you. It's nice to finally meet you".

Harry surveyed Sinclair before he shook her outstretched hand in return and said, "Hi".

"Why is Se–Professor Snape out?" Lily asked, stumbling over his name indecisively. "Um, he didn't say. Personal obligation, I'm not quite sure," Sinclair admitted with a shrug. Lily assessed Sinclair, unable to tell if she was being entirely truthful. "Right," Lily conceded, ruffling Harry's hair and adding, "Well, Harry's going to spend the day here, if that's alright?" Harry quickly made to flatten his hair, which Lily had ruffled. "Of course," Sinclair responded, turning to Harry again, "You're free to go to the potion-brewing chambers, as long as you stay to the side". Harry nodded reservedly, "Alright, thanks." Sinclair nodded warmly, "No problem, I'll see you later than," Sinclair concluded with one last smile before she turned back and moved towards the lifts.

"Who's 'Professor Snape'?" Harry asked later that day as he swung his legs back and forth over his seat timidly, his eyes searching the room around. Harry sat in the far back corner of the chamber, hands crossed on his lap, while Lily stood centered in the space, brewing and restocking the departments supply of anti-paralysis potions. Lily glanced up and repeated, "'Snape'?"

Harry nodded, "That woman–"

"Healer Sinclair?"

"Yeah, her, she said someone named Professor Snape wouldn't be here today. Who is he? Or she?" Harry asked, still swinging his legs. "Oh, he's the Potions Master who oversees my department," Lily explained, glancing up before she added, "You'll meet him, once you begin Hogwarts." This surprised Harry, his expression visibly less focused and more excited, he said, "At Hogwarts?" Lily nodded, stirring the potion counter-clockwise eighteen times, as Severus had instructed her to do. "He's a teacher there," She elaborated before indicating the potion below herself and stating, "For potions class." Harry smiled widely, "Wow! Is he any good?" Lily laughed at Harry's skepticism and said, "They say he's the best."

"Do you think he is?" Harry pressed, narrowing his eyes in further skepticism. Lily thought about this, although she knew her answer. What a strange question to have Harry ask her. Here he was, at work with her, asking about Severus Snape. "Mum?" Harry asked, waiting for her response. "Yes, I'd say so." Lily wondered if she ought to mention that Severus had gone to school with her, or that he'd been the best at potions in their grade. Should she tell Harry how Severus and her had grown up together? That they'd been best of friends? None of this seemed relevant but Lily felt as if she was hiding some secret life she'd had from Harry–ridiculous, Lily knew.

"If he teaches potions–I–will I have him my first year?... " Harry asked, curiously. "Yes," Lily nodded, thinly slicing the dittany. "Do you think I'll be good at potion-making?" Harry asked, nervously, straightening in his seat as to get a better view of what Lily was doing. Looking up at Harry's tone, she said, gently, "You'll be brilliant, don't worry about that." Shrugging, Harry said, unconvinced, "I might not be…." Pursing her lips, Lily said at last, "You will be, I'm sure." Harry nodded, looking to his hands. Lily wished she could say more, to comfort Harry, but didn't know what to say. "I'll tell you what," She began. Harry looked up again. "Since you're too young to help me, I'll explain what I'm doing," Lily offered, waving Harry over. Dropping from his seat, Harry approached Lily with a small smile. Bringin Harry's stool over to where Lily was working, she set it a good distance from the cauldron, but close enough for him to watch as Lily brewed it. Sitting on his knees, Harry watched as Lily continued to make the potion, now narrating what exactly she was doing to an eager Harry.

 _Tap. Tap. Tap._ Severus watched as Lucius' finger tips rolled on the glimmering surface, one finger after the other falling upon the mahogany before he repeated. The clock in the farthest corner clicked slowly. The chamber around Severus was dimly lit and well decorated. Extravagant chandeliers hung above, casting shadows below while a grand emerald carpet centered the floor beneath. Alecto and Amycus Carrow sat opposite Severus across the long table, while Lucius sat to Severus' right and Bellatrix Lestrange sat to Severus' left; the rest of the group filled out the table. Each member along the packed table wore similar dark robes and stoic postures.  
"Pettigrew claims He's been spotted in Hungary. If that's the case, that's where we should be searching," Antonin Dolohov pressed, irritably. "He is in Hungary!" Peter Pettigrew said defensively, his mousey eyes bulging as he spoke. Silencing Pettigrew, Lucius drawled out, "And yet, you've produced no proof?"  
"I need no proof, I know it! I saw it!" Pettigrew replied, to which Lucius only raised a brow, unimpressed. "Exactly, _you_ saw it," Rosier said dryly as he sat back in his chair, among the unconvinced in the group. "The Dark Lord is out there, we should be searching for him!" Bellatrix sighed hotly with impatience. "He'll find us when he's ready," Karkaroff scoffed with far too much leisure. "I'm not willing to pay for your negligence, Karkaroff," Lucius scowled. "The Dark Lord is out there," Lucius added, certainly. "We're not forgetting _the Marks_ , either, I hope? The Dark Lord is calling upon us, at last! We must go to him!" Bellatrix said, dignifiedly.  
It was this that got Severus' attention. Severus' mark had been burning for weeks, each day showing more clearer and proving more irritable. This was undoubtedly the Dark Lord's first and most obvious motion of stirring. "That cou'd be any'hing," Karkaroff said, although he looked less certain. This was one of Karkaroff's most pitiful flaws, his cowardliness. Severus knew, the Dark Lord could come to the man himself and Karkaroff would turn a blind eye; Karkaroff would rather stay in denial than face what was to come.  
"'Anything'?" Severus mused, speaking for the first time, repeating Karkaroff. Straightening his back and clasping his hands across the table, Severus looked to Karkaroff with ridicule to which Karkaroff only sneered.

"We need to keep searching," Bellatrix said with finality, regaining Severus and Karkaroff's attention. The room gave a consensus here. Every wizard and witch in the room knew, their leader was rallying, he was stirring. Something was beginning.

Listening as the group came to this conclusion, Severus' mind wandered, guardedly. Where The Dark Lord was? How strong was he? Was Severus still be in his good graces? Severus was prepared, whatever the case, and yet the anticipation was surprisingly intense. Severus wasn't nervous, no, he was ready. He was ready for this war to be done with, once and for all. These were only a few of the questions Severus considered as the rest of the table began to plan and he consciously memorized each word exchanged. Severus looked between the dark faces of his peers, each person before him having committed acts equally or more horrendous than his own. It was a strange feeling, Severus found, being back, in the familiar cloaks, all gathered in Malfoy Mansion not unlike before.

"Have you any news from the other side, Severus?" Lucius asked. Severus focused his gaze on the man before he said, in a level voice, "Only that they're suspicious. Which isn't surprising, given all the recent...commotion." This was an obvious nod at the recent village attacks.

"That was just a bit of fun," Alecto cackled with Amycus joining in. A few others at the table nodded in agreement or in approval. "It's foolish. Why alert them of the Dark Lord's return before it's even occurred? To warn them? To prepare them?" Severus said, critically, casting a look upon the entirety of the room. "So they know: We're not done," Rosier said, sleekly. Severus shook his head shortly, not accepting the answer. "Severus has a point. We want them off guard, for when the Dark Lord does reappear," Dolohov said, his eyes not looking to anyone in particular as he spoke.

After much debate, it was made clear no more such attacks were to happen, if only to better prepare for the Dark Lord's return. This worked in Severus' favor, as he'd planned it would; both able to put an end to the ridiculous village attacks and able to look as if his only motive was that of protecting the Dark Lord. Content with the day's meeting, Severus was relieved to leave earlier than he had previously thought he would and arrived within the Ministry of Magic shortly before one that day. The building was busy as usual as Severus pushed his way through the crowd to make for the lifts. Taking the lift directly down to the bottom floors of the building, where the potion-making chambers were located, Severus drew in a long breath of cool air as he entered the familiar corridors. The corridors were darker than most, as they were so far below ground, but Severus didn't mind the poor lighting. In fact, over the last few weeks, Severus had become very accustomed to the space, much like he had at Hogwarts. He relaxed in the atmosphere, prepared to enter the also familiar chamber and find Lily, focussing over the boiling cauldron, as usual.

Suddenly, Severus noticed something far less familiar: A sound.

A sound which came from the chamber Severus made to enter.

 _Laughter._

No, not any laughter, either. A child's. And Lily's.

Severus pushed the chamber door open and found Lily laughing fully as she looked down to a small boy with jet black hair and a lightning-bolt scar.

Harry Potter.

 **A/N:** And so concludes the chapter! I've been really excited about this chapter as it begins to develop Harry's character more. He's at such a particular age and I found it really exciting developing that in this chapter. Okay, that's all. Thank you all for reading as well as for all the recent reviews, you all are so kind!


	19. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

 **A/N** : Sorry once more for my long stalls between updates! Hopefully this chapter is worth the wait and thanks for reading!

The chamber door opening, Lily looked up to find Severus Snape at the entrance. Severus surveyed the scene, his expression crypt. Lily glanced to her son who looked up to Severus, unabashedly and with intrigue. "I wasn't aware you'd be here today," Lily said surprisedly, falling blank of anything better to say but breaking the silence nonetheless. "I had a change of scheduling," Severus answered, steadily, not so much as glancing Harry's way as he spoke. Severus appeared indifferent, Lily observed, of this abrupt change in his schedule. "Ah," Lily said in response, rather distractedly. Lily wondered where he'd been, as Severus had never been one to slack on his work but she knew better than to ask. Somewhere between civil and apathetic would be the best word to describe her and Severus' relationship, given it had its moments. At times it was very near amicable but still, a certain, undefined, distance remained between them, which granted Lily little to no right into his personal outings and whereabouts.

Realizing she'd been quiet for too long Lily looked away momentarily with unease before Harry pulled at her robes, expectantly. "Oh yes. Severus, this is my son, Harry. Harry, this is Professor Snape. Professor Snape oversees my position along with Healer Sinclair, who you met earlier," Lily introduced. Harry nodding slowly, he surveyed Severus, undisguised. "Harry has been spending the day here, as Remus couldn't watch him as usual," Lily explained, resting a hand on Harry's shoulder. Severus knew, from the Order meeting, where Remus had been sent away to. Or rather, why Remus had been sent away. "I see," Severus said, allowing his gaze to drop to Harry in acknowledgment. "Hello," Harry said, innocently, smiling shyly. "Hello," Severus replied, his tone reserved but not unkind. Lily squeezed Harry's shoulder reassuringly and smiled down at him. Harry only gave another shy smile and a sound of recognition before he looked up to Lily again. Apparently all the dire questions he'd posed to Lily earlier of Severus' classes within Hogwarts had dissolved, as Harry made no attempt to bombard Severus with questions of Hogwarts as he had to her after learning of his position within the school. No, this appeared to be the extent both Harry and Severus wished to converse. Harry looked to Lily nervously and than looked down to the potion awkwardly, offering up nothing more, while Severus looked back to Lily.

"I'll be finished soon," Lily said, indicating the potion below as she added, "Only a few minutes more, I imagine." Lily made to tend to the potion if only for something else to do than continue on silence between Harry and Severus.

"It is fine. I'll use one of the other chambers," Severus said, looking to the door and than the potion in front of Lily briefly.

"Oh, I really will be done soon," Lily said with a weak smile. "It is alright, I don't want to rush you," Severus offered, not oblivious to Harry, who still stared intently at Severus as he spoke. Pursing her lips, Lily offered a timid smile in concession in means to end the debate. Severus nodded in finality, looking to Harry as he said, "Mr. Potter." Harry lifted his chin and said politely, in a small voice, "Bye, Professor." Giving one last look of acknowledgment to Lily, Severus left, the chamber door closing behind him with a click.

How socially awkward her son and Severus were, Lily mused, throwing Harry a warm smile as his attention returned to the potion Lily worked on. "He doesn't talk much," Harry said, distantly, dipping his head as low as allowed to view the forming potion. "I suppose not, yes. But, neither do you?" Lily said, pointedly, brushing his hair back affectionately as she passed him to retrieve the vials. Harry seemed to consider this before he said, "I talk more than him, I bet." Laughing, Lily said, "Mm, yes, I'd say so too, but what's it matter?" Harry lifted his shoulders in a shrug and murmured, "I don't know. He didn't seem all that…friendly." Hesitating, Lily nodded slowly, "He's just not that…." What? Used to kids? Lily wasn't sure how to counter Harry's statement, the man worked with kids for a living, surely he was accustomed to children. "He just takes awhile to warm up to others, that's all," Lily said, decidingly. "Oh," Harry said, unconvinced. Lily nodded, before she said, changing topics, "Would you help me ladle these in?" Harry's eyes brightening, he nodded, excitedly.

Pulling on a single dragonhide glove, as a precaution, Lily handed Harry the other, which he slipped onto his dominant hand. Carefully ladling the potion into the vials with his gloved hand, Lily held each vial steadily while Harry scrunched his face in concentration and worked.

—*—

"Repeat it to me, once more?" Dumbledore instructed, fixedly. Severus obliged, relaying each and every detail of the recent Death Eater meeting to Dumbledore once more. Dumbledore stood opposite Severus in the room, staring out the window, deep in thought. As Severus spoke, Dumbledore remained neutral, his eyes intently forward, watching the Great Lake. Even so, Severus could practically hear the wheels ticking in the older man's head. Dumbledore wasn't missing a single word of Severus'. Surely Dumbledore was constructing some strategic plan in response to the forthcoming war, given this new information, undoubtedly considering each new step meticulously and with thought. Severus remained silent as he watched the older man's back, Severus' eyes boring into the maroon gowns Dumbledore wore as he did so. "Hungary…." Dumbledore repeated quietly, not addressing Severus, but contemplating the word. Turning sharply on his heels, Dumbledore said promptly, "We must continue to bid our time." Severus looked blankly at the man, believing he'd misheard. Bid our time? "I—bid our time? Headmaster," Severus said, disbelievingly. Dumbledore raised a hand and shook his head, marginally so. Severus drew in a sharp breath, made to speak once more and than fell quiet. "This is how it must be, Severus. We can't expose our cards anymore than they can—" Dumbledore said, his voice level and calm. "Surely, we must do something?" Severus argued, his voice maintaining stable. Dumbledore shook his head and replied, "Alas, there is little we can do, as of now," settling behind his desk and offering Severus the other seat, to which Severus obliged once more. "We could prepare our ranks?" Severus ground out, doing all he could to hold his tongue. "Lest more innocent lives are taken, if nothing else," Severus continued. Dumbledore smiled gently, far too calmly, and answered, "I'm impressed by you, Severus. Truly. But, we must think of the bigger picture, as I'm always telling you." Rolling his eyes, indiscreetly, Severus said, his voice more impatient this time, "What is the purpose of protecting for the greater good when all the good is gone, then?" Smiling further, Dumbledore said simply, "To save the ideology of goodness." Severus stared at Dumbledore incredulously and Dumbledore stared right back. "So your plan is to sit and wait until all hell's broke loose?" Severus sneered, unable to hold back any longer.

As far as Severus was concerned, far too many of Dumbledore's plans involved putting others at risk for the 'Greater Good'. Although Severus understood the concept premises, in times like this, he questioned the premise in its entirety. What was the point of protecting people when those people were likely to end up dead as a result of said protection? To prevent exposure to a seemingly imminent war? What good did it do to play their cards close when it'd only serve to postpone the inevitable?

Looking unfazed by Severus' tone, Dumbledore said, pressingly, "We need to wait, Severus. If we act now, we, like them, will enter with all our cards exposed. We will have no upper hand." Studying Dumbledore, Severus said, his voice back to its usual quiet drawl, "And what upper hand is that?"

"Peter Pettigrew," Dumbledore answered, meeting Severus' gaze. Severus held the man's look and than said, trying to cover his outrage, "You'll have to forgive me, but how could that spineless, pathetic excuse of a man ever be of help to anyone?" Watching Severus, Dumbledore said seriously, his voice lower, "That is...a valid question, by all measurements. Nonetheless, he might prove to have information that could be of use to us."

"Such as?" asked Severus, convinced whatever value the man possessed, Severus' hatred for Pettigrew outweighed it. "Hungary," Dumbledore answered, looking down to his desk and its contents as he spoke. Severus raised a brow, unimpressed by this response and repeaed, "Hungary?" Dumbledore nodded as he began to shift through the papers before him. Unamused by Dumbledore's aloofness, Severus pressed, "As I priorly said, Headmaster, there is no evidence that is the true location of the Dark Lord. More likely, it is just Pettigrew attempting to slither his way into the Death Eaters' good graces once more. To be accepted in higher ranks."

"That, my dear boy, is where we disagree. Pettigrew is not like you," Dumbledore began, inattentively. "I would think not," Severus scoffed. Dumbledore offered a mild smile and continued, "I only mean, he doesn't think like you: logically. Peter Pettigrew is too small of a man to concoct such a reasonable plan. Peter has and I fear will always be driven by selfish and blinding motives, he believes he'll rise not by gaining, as you put it, the 'good graces' of others but by bullying. If he believed he found Voldemort," Severus flinched, "He'd do everything to make sure this allies knew, if only so they could fear him." Considering this, Severus said, "Nobody has ever feared that man, with reason." Exhaling, Dumbledore shook his head, "Peter, foolishly, believes if he helps return his master, he'll be praised beyond any of his Death Eater peers. This, I am certain of. Peter has and always will be a follower. He does not go off on his own because he fears his own weakness and craves other's power…no….If Peter says he saw Voldemort in Hungary, that is where we must start. And to do so, without alerting Voldemort himself, we must postpone any further retaliation or acknowledgement." Standing, Severus began to pace. Dumbledore was evidently accustom to this behavior as he didn't even glance towards Severus' anxious body. Severus thought through Dumbledore's words as he continued his pacing. "Hungary," Severus repeated at last, this time without the question in the word. "Mmhm, I believe that's where our search must start," Dumbledore agreed, raising his eyes momentarily as he spoke, "We must isolate Tom, as best and as for how long we can." Severus nodded shortly before he said, "What if we can't defeat him when we find him?" It wasn't as foolish of a question as it sounded leaving his lips, after all, that was the whole point: no one seemed to be able to properly kill the…man? Could one even call such a malicious figure, such an inhuman soul, human? Dumbledore hesitated, setting aside the papers he'd been writing on. "Not yet, no, which is why this all must wait," Dumbledore instructed, clearing his voice with a feeble cough. "As well as keep Peter away," Dumbledore added, looking to Severus could tell, the man meant more behind this comment but chose to address the first issue at hand, "More waiting? Of course," Severus drew out, irritably. When Dumbledore didn't make to speak up in response, Severus prompted coldly, "What is it we are waiting for, exactly?"

Dumbledore took his time, mulling over this question as he sorted through more papers and scribbled more words in ink, and than, only after aligning his stacks of papers and setting them aside, Dumbledore slid a single book forward in front of Severus. Severus looked to Dumbledore, intrigued but still uncertain. And than, Dumbledore flicked his wand and the book flew open and Severus' eyes fell on the pages as they settled on a small section within.


	20. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

 _Horcruxes._

Severus had heard of them, once and ever so briefly, in his darkest days. When his ambition had been relentless and his conscious absent, Severus had come across the artifacts, or rather, information about the objects. From what he'd read then and what he understood from Dumbledore's summary, the object were beyond sinister. And in order to create a single such object–let alone however many the Dark Lord had managed to produce–it was atrocious. Severus' head was spinning, incessantly. He couldn't wrap his mind around what it was he'd just learned, or rather, what it meant. This, _the horcruxes_ , were the key to ending the war; to ending the Dark Lord. It should be a relief and yet, as the future progressed, as Severus' mission became clearer, it was daunting. Severus couldn't care less what he had to do, if it meant putting an end to this all, it was that _he_ carried such a great amount of the duty which was daunting. Quit literally, the weight of the world was on Severus' shoulder.

Worse though, the weight of Lily's life was on his shoulders.

Comfort came and went with all of this information, however. Severus was finally being put to real work. No more trailing the Hogwarts corridors to simply bide his time. Between the auror aid program and his time with the rising dark forces, with secret meetings with Dumbledore and Order assignments from Dumbledore, Severus was considerably busy. Not to mention his side project in helping Esmé with her comatosed patient. Better yet, a more defined plan was falling into place now, and it looked as if Lily would become safe sooner than later, given Severus played his part right and didn't fuck up. Unfortunately, much of this also meant consuming more time _with_ Lily. A small part of Severus was hindered that Lily had passed the month long probation as she seemed insistent, as long as they worked together, to maintain some sort of relationship with him. Lily continued to be chipper and friendly and Severus' own usual behavior had yet to put her off. Bidding him goodmorning and goodnight with whatever small talk in between, Severus' inclination to remain distant with her, to keep a distance, was failing. Lily was too respectable and kind for her own good, even after everything the world (and Severus) had put her through. This also made Lily a tad bit naive as well, Severus realized. Severus assumed it was this same naiveness which allowed Lily to act so civilally towards Severus after his initial frostiness towards her.

"You know," Lily began, breaking Severus from his thoughts, "Harry was very keen, when I told him you taught at Hogwarts. Endless questions." Severus, who was reading over the day's lessons on advanced burns and splinching solutions, paused and said, "Many children are. I imagine if he knew what subject I teach he'd be be a little less keen." Looking up from the articles she was reviewing, Lily said with a small smile, "Oh, no. I told him you teach potions. He was still very keen." Raising only his brows and eyes, his chin still tilted downwards, Severus looked mildly surprised. Her smile widening affectionately for her son, Lily looked back to the articles and said, "He loves brewing potions. When he was a toddler, he always used to help me out…."

"Mm, and now he doesn't?" Severus questioned, looking slightly amused. Laughing lightly, Lily shook her, "Not typically. He's too busy on that damn broom." Severus looked away, indecisively wiping away a small smirk. Lily's eyes caught his and she smiled kindly before she stood and began to sift through another stack of articles. The room was a mess, Severus realized, looking around and noticing just how many stacks there were scattered about the room. Articles on various ingredients and potions, which were both useful and distracting, covered the place. "Where is it?" Lily murmured to herself, fumbling through another stack. "What is it you're looking for?" Severus asked, shifting his attention from the lesson sheets before him and offering Lily his full attention. "The analysis of the properties of chickweed," Lily exhaled, diverting her attention between several stacks. At one point, the stacks had been alphabetically organized but between all those in the department who used the resources, they no longer had such a luxury. Not bothering to stand, Severus nodded his head towards a far back table before he allowed his attention to drop back on his own work, "On the far table, top of the stack." Severus only knew the article's location as he too had sought it an hour or so before. Lily looked mildly impressed that he knew this, but went over and retrieved the document silently. She was focused, Severus observed, allowing his eyes to glance over to her as she reviewed the information. Her lips were pursed as she scanned the papers, reminding Severus, not for the first time, of their time at Hogwarts. She used to wear the same expression at Hogwarts when they would study for exams and tests. Lily looked from the papers in her hands and then began to look further into the stack of resource articles while Severus resumed his own work. Waiting until he finished reviewing all the details for that day's lesson, Severus stood. Lily looked to him, expectantly, as he stood, Severus checking timepiece. Plenty of time. "Going somewhere?" Lily asked, curiously. Nodding, Severus said, stashing his papers in the desk, "Yes."

"Anywhere special?" Lily prompted, raising a brow humoredly. "I recently came upon what I believe could be the solution for your and Healer Sinclair's comatosed patient. I thought I'd try that out, as we have time." Severus explained.

"Oh? Um, what's the solution?" Lily asked, apparently intrigued. Rounding his desk, stepping before Lily, Severus crossed his arms and said discretely, "It's...it's a bit of an experiment, a potion. As nothing else has worked however, and this can't possibly hurt her, I believe this is the best option." Nodding thoughtfully, Lily nodded, "No, yes, of course….You'll have to tell me how it goes over." Lily offered a smile. "I will," Severus complied, offering another small nod before he turned. Reaching the door, Severus hesitated, his fingers around the handle.

He shouldn't permit any more time than necessary with Lily, he knew he shouldn't. If not for her own well being than that of her son's. Surely, once the Dark Lord truly returned, Severus couldn't be linked to the boy or Lily, even if through work. It was all too risky, especially given that the Dark Lord knew of Severus' history with Lily. How foolish Severus had been to bring Lily to the Dark Lord's attention, ever. Lily's safety remained key. It must reamined key. Severus hesitated. He shouldn't.

"If you wish….You could accompany me. After all, she is your patient too." Severus was turned back towards Lily, his hand still on the handle. Lily's brows raised in surprise, she nodded prudently, and stood to follow.

It only seemed right, Severus reasoned with himself. The patient _was_ Lily's, it seemed fit she should be there as Severus tried to make progress on the victim. Besides, otherwise Lily would simply sit in the room and look over articles she'd already read tenfold. Yes, it was best Severus make sure she was doing something productive. And, it wasn't as if one outing with her would put Lily on anybody's radar, let alone the Dark Lord's. Suspicion couldn't arise from a mere business outing.

Lily followed Severus in silence, though he could glimpse in his peripheral her tentive glances his way. The two hadn't been alone like this since their school days. Whenever they'd been alone in the recent past it'd been under one order or another, never by Severus or her own choice. _This is work too,_ Severus reminded himself restlessly. Still, it was _his_ choice to invite her, Severus' own mind countered.

Lily went first, once they'd reached floor's floo-network, and Severus followed behind, with a strained sigh. They arrived three floors below the ward they needed to be, but this was expected as it was the closest entrance via floo. "I was thinking, perhaps we should introduce dittany as a resource, for the lessons," Lily said, falling into step with Severus as they began down the corridors. He could tell by her tone, she spoke more out of obligation than need. She was uncomfortable with their silence in that moment, perhaps he'd been silent too long for even her liking. "It has so many properties and applications," she continued, talkatively. "It does," Severus replied, not ungrateful for some direction of conversation. "However, we'd have to address it carefully," Severus added. "Yes, I know. It's an often misconstrued element," Lily agreed, stepping behind Severus as the corridors narrowed and people made to pass the opposite direction. Severus waited until Lily was beside him again to respond, agreeably, "We can't risk them believing it's a solution to all wounds." Lily nodded, nonverbally, as she turned into the room to the left. The room was empty, except the patient atop the bed. Her complexion had shifted since Severus had last visited. The woman was ever so slightly paler and her skin appeared drier. _Curious,_ Severus pondered, stepping closer to the body. He could feel Lily still by his side, also inspecting the woman's condition. Lily stepped back partially as Severus exhaled and drew his wand. "Reparifors," Severus breathed, inducing a few more spells he was sure Lily hadn't ever heard before. Severus had done a lot of research on the matter and couldn't help but be sure this solution would regain the woman's consciousness. "Interesting," He heard Lily murmur, but Severus didn't reply and continued to focus on the patient. And then Severus withdrew a vial from his robes, Lily's eyes still intently watching his motions. Stowing his wand away and uncapping the vial, Severus stepped even closer. Holding the woman's jaw so that her mouth was wide, his fingers just skimming the flesh, Severus drained the vial's contents into the woman's mouth. Severus waited until he was sure the liquid had gone down before he stepped back. His eyes watched her carefully. "What was that?" Lily spoke up, her voice hesitant. But before Severus could answer, the woman's eyes flew open with a gasped and cough.

The woman was fine. Well, she would be. Healers swarmed the woman, Laney Simpkin, now. Laney Simpkin was still groggy, barely conscious. She'd just managed to tell Lily her name before she had crashed again. Severus had assured Lily and the other healers, as they probed the woman carefully, this was expected. It would be a slow regain of consciousness undoubtedly but Severus seemed convinced, the woman would regain full consciousness in the coming week or so.

Lily was impressed. Not by the fact that Severus had figured out how to wake Laney Simpkin but by the fact that he'd searched so deeply for a solution. She shouldn't have been surprised, given his job, but she was. Rarely–if ever–had the Severus Lily had known done something so...helpful? Selfless? Lily wasn't sure what the act was, but she was sure that the Severus she had known never would've gone out of his way to help some random woman in need who wasn't even his patient. Lily mentally added this to the growing list of things changed about Severus, since their school days. From what Lily understood, Severus had found a similar case, in the hospital records, of an unconscious man. In the particular case, an unnamed healer had produced an identical concoction to that which Severus had made, in means to restore Lily's patient. Apparently, according to Severus, the key ingredient was pheonix tears. It seemed rather obvious, once Severus had said it. Of course, how had Lily not even considered that? How had no one considered that? She supposed it was such a rarely used element, it had slipped everyone's mind. Nonetheless, Laney Simpkin was well on her way to a restored consciousness, all thanks to Severus. Lily paused as they walked back towards the floor they'd entered and hesitated. "Is there a problem?" Severus asked cocking an eyebrow, his tone reverted to the usual drawl. Pursing her lips, Lily faltered as she said, "It's just that I have a patient I should check up on, as we're here." Severus checked his watch casually and replied, "We have time, if you would prefer to?" Lily nodded, turning on her heels towards a near room. When Lily looked back to Severus, she found he still stood where she'd left him. "Aren't you coming?" She laughed, raising her face in amusement. Tilting his head, Severus looked considerate before he said, "I can easily wait." Rolling her eyes, Lily said, "Come on," and waited until Severus began towards her, before she too continued on her path. "What were you going to do?" Lily laughed, bordering a teasing tone, "Just stand there?"

"Obviously," Severus replied, clearly not as amused as her. Scoffing lightly, Lily shook her head, "Why?" She laughed with a shake of her head and then said, "Afraid to spend time with me?" Despite her light tone, an edge in her voice caught, surprising both Lily and Severus. "Of course not," Severus said after a moment of surveyance. His tone was reserved, as always. There had been some level of sincerity to the question, they both had heard it. _What had that been?_ Lily wondered _. Resentment? What could she possibly be resentful of?_ The answer to that was easy. There was no denying Severus' hot and cold behavior towards her since their reacquaintance and part of Lily knew this had to to with their past. "Good," Lily nodded, trying to break the awkwardness she'd just invited. She could feel Severus' eyes still on her, but Lily opted to ignore this as she lead the way into another room.

Lily knew the resentment was more than just his own behaviour now too. Part of it, deep down, stemmed from their school days, from his abandonment of her. Sure, Lily had ended the friendship, but Severus had given her no other option, and Lily realized she must still hold some grudge against him for this. For forcing her to end their friendship; to end the one relationship she had always relied on. "Lily," Severus said eventually. Lily looked up to him, cautiously, over the chart reports on the patient beside her, Oliver Stanton. There was such a familiarity to the way he said her name, it was spooky. "I–it wasn't my intention to...offend you?" Severus exhaled, his eyes adverting from hers. An apology from Severus Snape? _That_ truly was spooky. "You didn't," Lily said, offering a timid smile before she set aside the charts and began to cast examining spells over Oliver Stanton. "I just–I know _you_ aren't affected by–by our history, but it's a bit strange...working together again–seeing each other–after, well, everything….at least for me," Lily admitted, shyly, unable to look from where she casted healing charms and spells upon Oliver Stanton. She could hear as Severus tensed in the slightest, but his reply was tactful and soft, "Ah, well….I might not have been fully up front, in those regards…." Lily looked up again, watching him for a moment as he spoke, "I am aware that the situation is a bit–"

"Foreign?" Lily supplied with another small smile, though this was was more genuine. Severus nodded in affirmative, his own lips curling into a faint smile. The smile was unlike all the others Lily had managed to coax from him up until that point, this one was completely genuine and warm. _Foreign indeed,_ Lily mused, only smiling further as she looked back to her patient. Finished with the examination, Lily nodded to the door in conclusion, deviating her gaze from Severus', embarrassed to meet his eyes after the conversation which had bordered all too closely to sentimentality. Severus stepped out of the room, waiting until Lily too was out before the two strode down the corridor, a new found comfortableness slowly settling over them.

Surely, this was progress?


	21. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

 **A/N:** Thank you all for the reviews on the last chapter! I hope you all will like this chapter as well! I'd also like to apologize as usual for my always inconsistent updates and hope I haven't lost too many of you?! Some exciting things are about to transpire, so stay tuned!

Dumbledore circled the abandoned shack, poking at the debris and rubble, apparently uninterested. The shack was a collection of broken walls and loose floorboards with decaying furniture which was evidently long-ago deserted. Unfortunately there was nothing significant here, that much was obvious. This was Dumbledore's fifth location within Hungary to uncover and as of yet, he remained completely unsuccessful in finding any signs of Tom Riddle's presence.

Dumbledore was certain, based off of Peter Pettigrew's reports to Severus and the rest of the Death Eaters, if Voldemort was in Hungary, he'd be somewhere in this vicinity. Possibly, Dumbledore had missed him; perhaps Voldemort had passed through Hungary by now. The other explanation was that Pettigrew had lied as Severus had suggested, although it made no sense why this would be. Why would Pettigrew have motivation to lie? It wasn't as if Pettigrew was in a position to be lying to his own side? Was it possible Pettigrew wasn't letting on as much as he knew? Had Dumbledore been wrong about Pettigrew? Although Dumbledore liked to consider himself a more insightful person, especially in regards to the human mind, was it possible he'd been mislead? It felt as if he had.

Striding from the shack shambles, Dumbledore looked across a long plain of green fields. The shack he'd just left was set on the field outskirts and the field before him was vacant. Short on time, Dumbledore would have to return another time to continue his search. Dumbledore was unwilling to risk stopping his search for Voldemort within Hungary on the slim chance Pettigrew had had a moment of good fortune and managed to deceive Dumbledore. His search would continue until he was certain Voldemort's whereabouts weren't within Hungary.

Dumbledore had considered within his search the obvious facts too, such as Voldemort's lack of connection to Hungary. Based on his previous finds, Dumbledore knew he couldn't expect to find anything relating to Voldemort's horcruxes within this country, though Dumbledore knew there would be more than the initial three horcruxes he'd found thus far. If Voldemort was in Hungary it was on a strict need to remain obscure basis. Hungary was Voldemort's hiding place, nothing more or less. As for the horcruxes, that was another search entirely that Dumbledore had to endeavor on. Finding the horcruxes were one thing, however, Dumbledore still remained uncertain of how many horcruxes Voldemort had created. This made the task at hand all the much harder. So far, Dumbledore had found Marvolo Gaunt's ring, Salazar Slytherin's Locket; both of which he'd confirmed to be horcruxes though he hadn't managed to destroy them as of yet. Further, he suspected Voldemort's snake, Nagini, to be a third horcrux. Voldemort had become tenaciously attached to his snake around the ending of the last war, which Dumbledore perceived to be a confirmation of his suspicions.

Setting through the field, Dumbledore disappeared in his own steps, halfway across the plain. For now, Hogwarts required his attentions and Dumbledore's searches would have to wait.

Lily sat that morning, proceeding the day's lesson, leaning back in a chair as she ate her lunch. Feeling pleased with herself, for the first time in recent memory, Lily had virtually nothing to do. Waiting for Severus to finish the veritaserum potion he was working on, Lily ate contently. Her mind able to ponder trite thoughts such as what Harry was doing and when she'd see him later that day, Lily expected Severus to be finished any minute. Lily and Severus had plans to stop by St. Mungo's to follow up with Laney Simpkin, the comatose patient, following his completion of the veritaserum potion. Word of Laney Simpkin's stable regain into consciousness had reached the ministry earlier that day.

Lily's only prominent worry, asides from the always growing anxiety of the impending war and all that that meant, was that of time. Time had been something on her mind a lot recently. Ideas of what was to come for Harry and her, haunted Lily daily; not to mention, how she could properly shield her son from the looming darkness of the world and preserve his innocence. As Lily saw it, all of this was bound to fall apart, sooner than later. Time was consuming both her and Harry's life and they both needed more time for well, _everything_. Frowning disapprovingly at her own thoughts, Lily purposefully took a bite of food off her fork.

The door opposite Lily opening as Lily's eyes bore into it, her thoughts contemplative, Severus entered. Severus gave Lily a curious look at her intense and immediate attention, to which Lily offered a diffident smile. "Ready?" Severus said as a way of greeting. Nodding, Lily took one last bite of her food, capped the food container and shoved it into her bag on the floor, standing at the ready. "Yes," she said expeditiously as verbal confirmation. Severus looked as if he wanted to say something, but instead set his expression and nodded, notably. Lily laughed which induced Severus to give her another curious glance. This seemed to be how most of their relationship went. Lily would act or say something absolutely outlandish or juvenile but which was always just a little humorous and Severus would look to her as if she was unequivocally preposterous. Nonetheless, Lily could tell, he was always just a little amused too. It had become a bit like a game; Lily would see just how outrageous she could be while still retaining Severus' complete and utter attention. "You finished the veritaserum alright?" Lily asked, closing the door behind them as they left the room. "I did," Severus confirmed, evenly. "And when are we going to restock the anti-paralysis supply?" Lily asked, the two nearing the floo-network. "I was thinking tomorrow," Severus began, dropping off once they came in full view of the floo-networks. It was busier than usual Lily observed, queues formed behind each fireplace. Lily heard as Severus exhaled impatiently beside her, stopping behind the nearest queue. Smirking, Lily said, "We're not in any hurry." Severus acknowledged this, hesitating before he said, a little more agreeably, "I suppose not." Lily smiled, entertained by his almost childlike impatience. Lily had long been accustomed to Severus' complaining, but given their recent reacquaintance and the long spans of time together, she had also become even more accustomed to his frequent impatience. Somehow, Lily found this behaviour humorous as with all his complaining, he never really seemed all that peeved. He was always so stoic and serious, so unimpressed, she found it hard to ever consider his behaviour as anything near severe or firm. This had always been a complexity in Severus' behaviour, as despite his reservedness, his soft and quiet nature made him interesting more than anything else. It was clear, however genuine all his complaining was, it was insignificant in defining him as a person. Lily knew, she had alway known, there was more to him than at first glance.

"Mrs. P–" Lily broke him off with glare which her smile failed to convey. "My bad," Severus corrected, although he only nodded towards the moving queue in explanation. Lily moved forward, throwing Severus another disapproving look for his slip as she did so. Severus chose to ignore this. Lily saw no reason for Severus to remain so formal when he addressed her and _did_ find it irritating, actually so, that he felt a need to keep such formalities between them; especially given their progressing acquaintanceship and time together.

The queue moving forward more, Lily soon reached the front. Stepping forward, Lily felt the familiar warmth as she disappeared within the flames, only to reappear within St. Mungo's walls seconds later. Waiting until Severus too had appeared, the two began to walk once more. "Has Healer Sinclair told you anything of the woman's background yet?" Severus asked Lily as they fell into a pace. Shaking her head, Lily said, "Why? Has she told you something?" Severus portrayed a small, refuted, motion _: No, Sinclair hadn't mentioned anything to him either_. "Well, whatever that poor woman went through, I can't imagine it was good," Lily sighed, voicing her thoughts aloud. Severus gave a sound of recognition, as he they began to take the stairwell.

When they entered the patient's room, they found Sinclair standing before Laney Simpkin, her arms crossed as the two talked. Laney sat up against her pillows with her knees raised to her chest under the thin hospital blanket as she spoke. "No, I didn't see his face," She was saying as Lily and Severus stepped further into the room. Sinclair nodded, gently, before she pressed, "I'm sorry to ask you these things, especially as you're still recovering, but–"

"I get it," Laney nodded, weakly before she continued, "I want this guy caught as soon as possible, too." Sinclair gave a warm smile and said, "I bet. Well, if you can remember anything else, don't hesitate to find me." Laney tried for a smile but it came off more as a grimace. She must still be in pain. The woman's eyes then fell on Lily and Severus in acknowledgment. "These," Sinclair introduced, beckoning Severus and Lily closer, "Are my colleagues, Professor Snape and Lily Potter. Professor Snape is the one who found the solution to restore your consciousness, and Mrs. Potter has been working on your case since day one." Laney's eyes flickered briefly to Lily and then to Severus as she politely said, "Oh, wow. Well, jeez, thanks." Severus nodded courteously in response. "Both of you, thank you, really," She repeated, smiling to Lily cordially. It was apparent the woman wasn't sure how to express her full gratitude to two complete strangers. "I imagine you're tired, so we'll let you rest. Severus, Lily, could we speak in the hallway?" Sinclair said formally, offering Laney one last encouraging smile. Lily and Severus obliged, both following Sinclair out.

Sinclair waited until Laney's room door was closed before she turned to Severus and Lily and said, "She doesn't remember much."

"How much does she remember?" Severus questioned while Lily made a motion of like-inquiring. "According to her, a man in Death Eater robes cornered her out of the blue, in the alley she was found in." Sinclair began when Severus interrupted, "A single man? Is she sure it was a Death Eater?" Sinclair nodded, "I asked the same thing. It's weird, isn't it? They usually travel in packs."

"That they do," Severus agreed. It was rare, if not unheard of, for a single Death Eater to attack alone, Lily knew this. The situation implied the attacker was an isolated Death Eater, even maybe acting off their own instruction. In all the attacks she'd read of during the war, it was always two or more death eaters together–never just one. "Do you think the attack was personal, than?" Lily asked, delicately. "No, not a chance….History shows, that's not how Death Eaters work. They take assignments from their superior, they don't act under individual thought." Severus explained, hesitating as he spoke. Sinclair inlined her head in accordance to Severus' explanation, while Severus seemed to be deep in thought, perplexed by the circumstance. "It gets stranger," Sinclair continued with a deep sigh. "They struggled and she tried to fight back, but she said he was heavier than her so he had an advantage. Anyways, he forced her against the wall while he….he cut her and...he took a sample of her blood," Sinclair broke off, shaking her head uneasily. "He….?" Lily repeated, baffled. Sinclair nodded. "Did...as if–in a vial?" Severus clarified, clearing his throat cautiously. Sinclair nodded again, "That's what Ms. Simpkin said."

"And then?" Lily prompted, tensely. "That's the last thing she remembers," Sinclair shrugged, looking down to a chart in hand and scribbling notes as Lily and Severus thought over what Sinclair had told them. Lily looked to Severus who looked as if he was in a different world entirely, his focus distant. "I have to go turn this statement report in," Sinclair said in farewell, her expression thwarted. "We should head back," Lily agreed, looking to Severus. Severus made no note of recognition to either. "Severus?" Sinclair said, raising her voice to draw in his attention. "Severus?" Lily laughed, exchanging a look with Sinclair. Severus' eyes turned sharply to them. "We should be going," Lily said, raising her eyes pointedly. "Oh, right," He nodded, stepping forward, falling into step with Lily and Sinclair as they began to walk forward.

Severus was quiet as they made their way back through the hospital, into the ministry and into a potion-brewing chamber; Severus barely speaking, even to reply to Lily. "What're you thinking about?" Lily asked curiously, feeling ever so slightly brave as she asked the simple question. Lily wasn't sure why she felt as such either, asides from that it was uncharted territory she was delving into with the question. After all, Severus could take the question several different ways; some of which could be construed as more intimate than what she'd intended. "The better question is, what am I not thinking of?" Severus replied, not missing a beat with his reply. Severus didn't question Lily's probing into his personal realm of thought or her motives for asking, he simply accepted that Lily was asking at all. Or possibly, Lily supposed, he could be too absorbed in prospective thought to even give Lily's gesture a second thought.

"I don't understand," Severus was ranting as he paced Dumbledore's office. "Why–who was it? Why were they acting in their Death Eater robes–and under the Dark Lord's name!?" Dumbledore stood by the office window, his back to Severus. " _Albus_?" Severus said, a little harshly, stopping mid step and facing Dumbledore, who he then realized hadn't said a single word sine Severus had stormed into his office earlier that evening, in desperate need of answers. "I don't know, Severus," Dumbledore answered, bleakly. "What do you mean, 'You don't know'?" Severus said, his voice dropping low as he spoke with reluctance. "It's possible...I believe…." Dumbledore turned to the far back bookshelves in the office. Dumbledore's fingers trailed the book bindings before he pulled out a dim, tightly bound, book. Dumbledore flipped through the book, almost with urgency and very unlike when he'd shown Severus the text on horcruxes. Dumbledore's eyes skimmed the text busily. At last, he looked up to Severus and said, "I believe you may have been right about Peter Pettigrew." Severus dropped to the seat opposite, prompting for Dumbledore to continue. "There's this ritual…." Dumbledore began, shaking his head before he picked up again, "It's ancient. I hadn't even considered it…."

"What is it?" Severus asked, slowly. "I fear, it might be how Tom Riddle is planning his great return." Dumbledore said grimly. Severus shifted, "Care to clarify?"

"The ritual requires the blood of a victim–" Dumbledore explained. "Laney Simpkin?" Severus breathed, hoping he was wrong. "Yes, most likely. However in my scripts, the victims….they're killed…." Dumbledore replied distractedly. "Who obtained the blood then? Maybe they're performing the ritual incorrectly?" Severus said, distracted by what all this meant. This, combined with the information from earlier that day, Severus didn't know what to make of it all. "Perhaps, it seems unlikely...I do believe, Peter Pettigrew may be the one behind this," Dumbledore digressed. "Well, if that's the case, it wouldn't be surprising that he's messed it up?" Severus said, sounding more like himself. "Mm, indeed. However, I fear we've been led astray, Severus….It seems we've fallen into Pettigrew's ploy. He was counting on that you'd see it fit to give me this information, to keep up the 'pretense' as my inside source." Dumbledore said, detangling the web. In what world was Peter Pettigrew smart enough–logical enough–to trick not _only_ Severus but Dumbledore as well! The world truly was spiraling! The whole thing was incredulous! But, Severus couldn't deny, it made sense. Pettigrew gathered Laney Simpkin's blood early on, so that the attack appeared separate from all of the other rising Death Eater activity. Then, as Pettigrew believed Severus had to maintain his position as the Dark Lord's spy within Dumbledore's ranks via intel, Pettigrew offered up the trivial and false detail of Dark Lord being in Hungary knowing Severus would use the information to his own advantage. Pettigrew could then bid his time as he composed the ritual Dumbledore had been speaking of, to bring back the Dark Lord. The only missing piece was, why was Laney Simpkin still alive? If Dumbledore was correct in his conclusion, Laney Simpkin should be dead. Why wasn't she? Had Pettigrew simply just made a mistake? As much as Severus believed it possible, Pettigrew simply managing to mess yet another assignment, Severus didn't believe that to be the case in this instance. Peter Pettigrew, and the Dark Lord, were playing their cards with precision and care; they were playing to win. The Dark Lord was monitoring Pettigrew's every move, undoubtedly. As Severus looked to Dumbledore, he knew, Dumbledore had come to the same conclusion as him. They, meaning Severus and Dumbledore, had best up their game, if they wanted to end war anytime soon.


	22. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

Severus watched the clock, fixedly, as Dumbledore's voice buzzed in the background. Each hand on the clock's face clicked in sequential correspondence, harmoniously. The meeting had been ongoing for the last hour and a half, an especially long Order meeting compared to the previous ones. Dumbledore had spent this time relaying the new revelations, with caution, which he and Severus had found in regards to Pettigrew and the Dark Lord's plans. Severus had been quick to pick up on Dumbledore's inconsistencies in the information he did and didn't share with the others, Dumbledore opting only to divulge that Pettigrew had found a plan to revive the Dark Lord. Dumbledore had spent the rest of the hour and a half drafting each Order member to varying assignments; most were sent off to start the search for Peter Pettigrew while some others such as Kingsley Shacklebolt and a few others were to begin assembling Ministry Official ranks. This task specifically, as Dumbledore had stressed, was to be handled with special care. Although ranks against the Dark Lord needed to be formed, with the aid of the Ministry's power, the task must remain a private one, lest corrupt Ministry officials catch hold of Dumbledore's plans.

As of yet, Severus hadn't been assigned to any of these such tasks. Based off of Severus' history working under Dumbledore, Severus was sure Dumbledore had an entirely different task planned for Severus. Most likely, Dumbledore had more schemes of spying and lying in store for Severus. "And what should I do? Should I join the search for Peter?" Lily said, prompting Severus' attention back to those around him. Lily looked to Dumbledore, her back straightening as she faced him. "Ah, no. As of now, I believe it'd be best you stay put, for safety's sake," Dumbledore responded sympathetically, peering over his spectacles to meet Lily's stare. "Right, just as I said," Sirius remarked sharply. Severus personally agreed with Sirius, a true phenomenon indeed, nonetheless, Lily's safety would be more than be put at risk if she joined the pursuit. Lily ignored Sirius' comment and said instead, still facing Dumbledore, "Oh." Her disappointment at being pushed aside was more than evident. "Well, I can–I can still help? Really, with anything?" Lily suggested, her expression hopeful. "Lily, you need to stay safe just as much as your son does," Molly Weasley said, reassuringly. "I can't just do nothing!" Lily protested, furrowing her brows. Severus could roll his eyes at her irrational behavior; Lily always had been far too altruistic for her own good. "If you wish to talk about this further, I insist that we continue this discussion afterwards," Dumbledore said, putting an end to the debate. Still frowning, Lily looked as if she was going to argue more but last minute seemed to decide otherwise; her lips opening and then closing with frustration. "As I was saying," Dumbledore said, returning his focus to the issues at hand, "It is crucial that this information remains carefully contained." Severus was beginning to wonder if there was any point in his being at this meeting. Thus far, all the information that had been disclosed was either irrelevant for Severus' role or, it was information he already knew. Severus considered everything else he could be doing, instead of being in this room, listening to Sirius' dimwitted and senseless comments and Dumbledore's continuous commentary. Instead, Severus could be preparing for the next day's lesson, preparing potions for the aurors' field work, for looking into Pettigrew's whereabouts himself–to name a few things.

At long last and not at all too soon, Dumbledore dismissed the meeting. The customary scraping of chairs sounding, Severus stood, relieved to finally leave the stuffy room. Moving with the crowd, waiting irritably as those before him shuffled out, Severus noticed as Lily moved against the flow. Apparently, Lily was set to continue her and Dumbledore's previous conversation. But apparently, Dumbledore had other plans, "Severus, a word please?"

Severus exhaled rigidly and turned, rerouting towards Dumbledore. Lily stood not far from Dumbledore, looking to Dumbledore in both irritation and apprehension. Severus waited until he reached Dumbledore before he said dryly, aware Lily was close enough to hear whatever he said to Dumbledore, "Is there an issue, Dumbledore?"

"No, no," Dumbledore said, gesturing Lily over. Severus looked to Dumbledore with tenacity and Dumbledore smiled back lightly. Lily stepped forward, eyebrows raised, "I hoped we could continue our discussion, Dumbledore? I really–" Dumbledore nodded unconcernedly, breaking Lily off. "I figured that much, which is why, if you're truly determined to aid us, I'll ask once more that you remain put and safe," Dumbledore sighed, raising a single brow assertively. Lily simply looked back, unsatisfied with his response. Severus let out another acute exhale; _what was the meaning of this._ "I presumed you'd react as such," Dumbledore accepted, unsurprised. "Dumbledore," Severus said, restlessly. Dumbledore raised a hand mildly in a acknowledgement as he continued, now to Severus, "I need you to look into…." Dumbledore paused, choosing his words discreetly, "The procedure in which Pettigrew plans to restore Voldemort."

"The 'procedure'?" Severus repeated, understanding immediately regardless that he said it as a question. Dumbledore nodded in confirmation while Lily looked between the two. "Additionally, I'll ask that you fill Mrs. Potter in on...the situation, and allow her to help you in your research," Dumbledore stated, prudently. Severus could only stare in response, though he sensed as Lily looked to him, expectantly. Surely, this wasn't happening? Dumbledore–of all people–was instructing Severus to spend time _with_ Lily, the very woman he'd warned Severus to remain distant with. As if the time they already spent together wasn't enough to further complicate Severus' personal conflicts regarding Lily, now Severus was being asked–told–to spend virtually all his remaining time without her, with her! Paradoxical, most definitely. "What research?" Lily asked, curiously, her eyes still glancing unsurely to Severus. "Severus will explain," Dumbledore said, seemingly satisfied with his solution to the issue at hand. "Ah," Lily nodded slowly, her tone settling appeasably. Yes, Dumbledore's issue had been solved. Unfortunately, Dumbledore's solutions always seemed to create Severus' issues; funny how that worked.

"Well," Dumbledore concluded, clasping his hands loosely, "I'm sorry to rush off, but I have some stuff to attend to, so I'll leave you two to it." And with that, Dumbledore left. Severus looked to Lily, who looked back to him, her eyes sparkling optimistically. Severus shifted his eyes as his stomach tightened uncomfortably.

Things for Severus were becoming undeniably complicated.

"And so...we have to find out if this ritual can be performed even with Laney Simpkin alive?" Lily asked, clarifying. Severus nodded, affirmatively, not lifting his eyes from the text he read. The two sat against a wall within an abandoned chamber, their usually assigned room occupied with a current auror meeting. Piles of texts laid between the two; books and books about ritualistic revivals. "And are we certain there's only one ritual that fits what Peter's trying to do?" Lily said, not focussing on the book in hand but looking to Severus. Severus glanced up, offering a small "Mmhhm." Lily pursed her lips, keeping her eyes on Severus as she mulled over all the information he'd given her over the last day and a half. Peter had been one step ahead of them for who knows how long and because of this, Voldemort would return within the next few months unless Severus and Lily found out how to prevent it or if Peter's mistake was irreconcilable with the ritual–in sum. Lily was doing her best to swallow the sorely sour pill, nevertheless, it was hard to swallow. Lily had prepared herself for this, she'd been prepared for weeks, and still, it was hard to accept. Thoughts drifted to Harry and his inescapable future. More than once, Lily considered simply dropping everything, grabbing Harry, and fleeing; it wasn't too late to do so, Lily reminded herself. Lily wasn't above putting her son's safety before everyone else's, whatever Harry's fate and however Voldemort was tied to it, Harry came first. No, Lily's fear was that even if she fled, she wouldn't make it far before Voldemort found and killed them. It was better that Lily stayed where she and Harry had resources, where they had Dumbledore. If anyone could help Harry, it was Dumbledore; and didn't they always say, Dumbledore was the only one Voldemort had ever feared.

"Lily?"

Lily blinked, realizing she'd been staring. Blushing out of embarrassment, Lily said, "Sorry…." Severus surveyed her attentively before he asserted, "Is something on your mind?" Lily smiled and shook her head, dismissively, "No, well yes, but nothing I'd want to burden you with." Severus seemed to consider this, "Ah, hmm. I suppose you should know then, I handle burdens considerably well–especially when they're not my own." Lily smiled graciously and chuckled, "Is that so?"

"It is," Severus confessed, closing the book in his lap but keeping his hand in between the pages to mark his spot. Lily's smile wilted but didn't dissolve as she exhaled, deeply, "It's just the same things I always worry about."

"Which are?" Severus prompted, sitting up straighter against the wall. Lily gave another wry laugh, folding her knees against her chest, "My son–Harry." Unlike the first time Lily had mentioned Harry, weeks before, Severus didn't seem to shy away from the topic. "I see," Severus said, delicately. Lily bit her lower lip hesitantly as she nodded, "Yes. It's just...he's so young and everything's happening now." An expression of instant understanding passed Severus' face, "I'm sure it's difficult raising a child, forget the times we live in and that your son has a _unique_ circumstance by all standards." Lily felt a surge of gratification for Severus' considerate insight. Lily made a gesture of recognition as she picked up a near book aimlessly, randomly flipping through it. "Yeah, it is. But, with our...circumstances," Lily began, repeating Severus' word choice, "He'll be pulled into it all, no matter what I do to protect him. I can't just try and shield him from the darkness like other parents who aren't in our situation can try and do. Harry's in the thick of all of this and doesn't have a choice." Lily felt a breath of relief leave her body, anxiously as she unloaded her woes upon Severus' observant gaze. "I can't argue with that, but Lily," Lily met Severus' eyes at the sincerity in his voice, "You act as if he's doomed?" Lily laughed, but the sound came out harsh and dark, "I do, don't I?" Severus' lips slid up, attempting to offer encouragement. "He's not doomed, not unless you keep acting as such. He has an entire army of people on his side, and most importantly, he has you." Severus reasoned, pointedly, opening the book he'd been reading once more. Lily contemplated this and than replied, softly, "None of that can ensure his happiness or innocence–or even his safety." Severus studied the text below him as he offered, "Perhaps not, but as I said, don't act so certain he's condemned; he isn't. Certainly not if you have anything to do with it." Lily made a sound of agreement, focussing in on the text as she said, "Are you part of the army of people, on Harry's side? On mine?" Lily couldn't bring herself to look at him when she asked the question, her underlying message too obvious. She sensed as Severus stiffened, all too aware of what she was asking. There was no backing out though. And, Lily wanted to know. "Of course I am," Severus answered, although his tone had reverted back to his usual reserved tone. "But...you weren't always?" Lily urged timidly. Lily heard, though she still didn't look up, as Severus set his book aside again, looking to her disguisedly. "What are you asking, Lily?" Severus said, not beating around the bush. Lily shrugged and then declared as nonchalantly as possible, eyes still on her book, "People talk, one hears rumors." When Severus didn't speak up again, Lily looked up to him. Severus simply lifted a brow, appearing almost amused. "Were–weren't you, you know, on the other side? Before…." Lily asked at last. Severus didn't flicker his attention at her words, and instead remained silent for a moment and then gave the slightest nod, deviating his vision.

Lily looked away, nervously. She tried to pin down how she felt about this truth but couldn't. She was definitely hurt and saddened by the information. And there was undoubtedly anger in her. But there were more emotions than just those going through her. Lily felt as if with each new day, more and more daunting information came to light.

"It was inexcusable and senseless, as well as a long time ago." Severus punctuated, continuing on, "But, my loyalties are steadfast now." Lily forced herself to look up, although she still didn't meet his eyes when she stated, "They did– _do_ –evil things." Like killed James, she secretly thought; like hunting my son. Severus bowed his head in admission, not arguing. "Why–when–did you...convert? To us?" Lily asked, not knowing any other way to describe his actions. "At the end of the war," Severus answered, showing the first signs of apprehension as he folded his hands. "Oh," She inhaled, her stomach filling with a painful pang.

Everyone had been right, Lily had been right. Severus had been a death eater, just as Lily had always feared.

He's good now, she reminded herself. Or was he? How could she be certain? Betrayal, that was what she was feeling; betray and distrust. "An–and why again?" She repeated, tightly. "Why?" Severus repeated, leerily. "Why did you join us?" Lily bit out, hardly able to control her disapproval over that she even had to ask such questions. Severus stared and then answered, "I had a change of perspective." There was a pause. Severus seemed to sense her confined animosity because he stood and said, "I'm going to take stock of the potions." Severus then begun to gather the stacks of books he'd brought in, when suddenly, he dropped half, his body sinking for only a moment before he straightened again, recollecting the books hastily and left before Lily could even register what had happened.

His arm was searing. It was beyond anything he'd felt before. A burning so intense, water brimmed Severus' eyes. Severus dropped the books within his arms the second he turned from the corridor which lead to Lily. Seizing his forearm, Severus instinctively tried to apply pressure to the pain, as if that'd help. There was no time to waste. Severus hastily tried to recompose himself before he returned the books to their place with a nonverbal cast and he vanished.

Appearing in a large field of grass, Severus' eyes strained to see properly. It was dark, darker than he'd expected. Blinking, in hopes his vision would focus, it took Severus a minute to recognize, he was surrounded by other like-adorned figures. None of the figures spoke as Severus stepped out of the center and joined the ranks, silently.

It was happening, Severus didn't need anyone to tell him that.

Luckily for him, he wasn't the last to arrive. A half a dozen more following his arrival, it was only once the entire party had arrived that their attention was drawn. Peter Pettigrew had been the one to call them. Severus saw as the ranks broke apart across the way from him and it was here that he first appeared: Pettigrew. Buggy eyed and mousey still, but no one was looking down to him as they had at the last gathering. The ranks broke and rejoined as respectfully as they did for the Dark Lord himself.

Nothing was going according to plan, but then again, nothing these days seemed to go according to plan. Pettigrew's voice was as high and anxious filled as usual as he talked to himself, agitatedly. His body language was just as spastic as his voice. Pettigrew walked in circles between the rest and Severus couldn't help but resent the fact that a man like Pettigrew carried such power and apparently now, respect as well.

And in one swift movement, everything changed. A flash along the sidelines of the circle, and he appeared. Cloaked, alive, and in the flesh.

Voldemort was back.

 **A/N:** Thank you all for reading and thanks for the reviews! I love hearing everyone's input on the story!


	23. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

Nobody knew. Nobody but Dumbledore, Severus and the select other Death Eaters who had been called to action the previous night. The memory of the Dark Lord's return weighed heavily on Severus, Severus still able to picture the entire night vividly. The Dark Lord had been severe in all regards that night, as well as composed, but mostly–he had been impetuous. Nonetheless his intentions had been obscure and murky in regards to everyone and everything except one: Harry Potter. His motives there were clear as daylight. Worse though, Dumbledore seemed just as careless in his own pursuits. As usual, Dumbledore was holding his cards close; far too close for Severus' comfort. And, Dumbledore's plan was precarious and unstable at best. As it was, these weren't unusual traits to Dumbledore's schemes, but now, more was at risk. His schemes were no longer addressing a hypothetical future war, they were a product of war. People's lives were at stake, more than ever before, and both men on the war's front were callous to this.

Which, coming from Severus, was saying something.

Severus had been worried, even before Voldemort's return. In comparison, Dumbledore's behaviour from before was utterly lax. Both sides were intensifying with each next day, and only Severus saw how catastrophic the outcome would be. War unlike anything before would surely come as a result. Obviously Severus expected this from the Dark Lord but from Dumbledore? No.

And then, as if Severus didn't have enough to consider, there was Lily.

Since Severus had admitted his past to her, Lily had iced Severus out. Lily only speaking to Severus when necessary for work, she was polite and removed when she did. She wasn't rude, and she hadn't opted to bring up their previous conversation, but Severus could practically feel her disapproval when she'd look his way. Severus couldn't blame her either. If he were in her position, he'd have reacted just the same. Lily knew, Severus had contributed not only to the death of her husband but to the hunting of her child. Unforgivable, undoubtedly. Even if it was only James bloody Potter who'd perished, Severus added internally. No, not even Potter senior deserved death as it had come. Severus couldn't even begin to imagine how Lily would react if or when she found out just how instrumental Severus really had been in those events; events which had so prominently changed her life and caused her so much pain.

Severus knew Lily deserved to know the whole truth, but he wondered if he'd ever be able to tell her it. How could he? As if Severus hadn't hurt Lily enough in their many years on knowing one another, how could he bring her more betrayal?

A better man could tell Lily the whole truth.

Yes, Severus was weak when it came to Lily Potter. Excruciatingly so.

It was better this way, Severus told himself. Maybe now Lily would know enough to stay away for good. Severus was dangerous–and selfish. He'd already allowed too much contact, their relationship was bordering, dare Severus say, on a renewed friendship–which was something neither could afford, whether or not Lily realized it. Especially given the times they now lived in.

"Severus?"

Startled, Severus looked up. Esmé Sinclair stood at Severus' Ministry office door, searchingly. "Esmé," Severus greeted, straightening up in acknowledgement. Esmé stepped into the office, closing the door behind her. Severus looked down to the papers below him and then leaned back more comfortably as Esmé sat opposite. "Is this a social call then?" Severus offered, lacing his hands and resting them against his diaphragm. Esmé smiled and replied, "You looked far too contemplative, I thought you could use some company." Esmé was similar to Severus in that she rarely smiled, at least grandly and without a sarcastic air. Severus liked that they had this in common. It was always familiar ground when it came to Esmé, which Severus couldn't say was the same with Lily. Granted, the two women played grossly different roles in his life. "Severus," Esmé laughed, pressingly. "I'm just...busy," Severus supplied, naturally. Esmé nodded, understandingly and said, "I'd imagine so, you have a lot happening." Severus smiled, dryly, "I cannot argue with that." Esmé watched her lap for a second and then said, "You always have spread yourself thin, though." Severus nodded admittedly and exhaled amusedly, "You know a lot about that yourself, however." Esmé laughed lightly and conceded, a single eyebrow lifted entertainingly, "And what is that supposed to mean? Think I can't handle it?" Severus held her look, for a second, and then answered, "Never. You're very capable." Esmé rolled her eyes and breathed pointedly, "Perhaps, but not nearly as competent as you. I do fall short, time to time–so unlike you." Severus tilted his head up, surveying Esmé as he said, "Self-deprecation doesn't suit you."

"I'm offended," Esmé began playfully, "And it isn't self-deprecation if it is true," she continued flatly, looking away modestly. Severus made a small, unconvinced, "Mhm." Esmé smiled softly, also unconvinced, but she dropped the topic. Emsé levelled her eyes with Severus' and said, "So, what is it you're so distracted with today?" Severus considered this, jotting down notes still as he responded, "Nothing in particular." A a flat out lie. And, evidently, Esmé picked up on this. "So, this has nothing to do with why my resident healer's been so quiet lately?" Esmé inquired, crossing her arms and lifting her gaze studiously. Severus tensed, only for a second, and then composed himself again. Fixating his eyes on the papers before him, Severus took his time to reply, "Has she been?" Esmé looked to Severus and responded, "You haven't noticed?" Severus peered up and shook his head finitely. "Well," Esmé exhaled, "I just thought, maybe you knew something of it." At this, Severus set aside his quil, considering Esmé carefully as he said, "And why would you think that?" Esmé faced Severus squarely, unfolding her arms and resting them on the desk, hands clasped, "You two talk quite a lot and well, truthfully, I've noticed you both haven't seemed as...friendly, lately–to one another." Severus met her look and then resumed his scribbling as he said, "She and I work together, Esmé, of course we talk."

"So, everything's alright with you two then?" Esmé questioned. Offering a weary sigh, Severus bowed his head, maintaining his usual cool, "As alright as you can expect of colleagues." Esmé nodded, recentering the jar of bezoars floating in preservatives which was on the corner of his desk as she spoke, "Alright. She's just seemed off and I was hoping you'd have an explanation." Severus continued to write, making a sound of acknowledgement but offering up nothing more. "Alright," Esmé said again, standing and leaning on the desk edge with her hands in finality, "I have to go–people to heal." Severus nodded once more, glancing up in farewell. Esmé gave another smile and then closed the office door carefully behind her.

If this wasn't a sign that Lily's role in Severus' life had become too evident, Severus didn't know what was. The idea that Esmé not only knew Severus and Lily had become considerably cordial with one another–current circumstances aside–but that she'd seen reason to deduce that Severus was the cause of Lily's current behavior, it was all far too unnerving. If Severus and Lily's relationship was that obvious, Severus was in far more trouble than he had previously believed.

As this was the case, they were most certainly better off with the newfound conflict between them. Distance would do everyone some good.

Lily woke abruptly, an incessant tapping noise bringing her from her dreams. Lily sat up, listening intently for a moment before she moved for her wand, silently. Throwing her blankets aside, Lily stepped into the hallway cautiously. Down the steps, arm and wand outstretched, Lily stared at the door opposite when she reached the staircase base. Someone was knocking on the door. Glancing up towards Harry's room, Lily swiftly moved forward, opening the curtains of the nearest window to peer out onto the doorstep.

A figure stood put, no longer knocking, the visitor's eyes met Lily's through the window pane. Even with the shadows against his image, Lily knew who it was. Lowering her wand, Lily opened the door.

"Lily," Dumbledore greeted warmly, standing in his profuse maroon robes and half-moon spectacles as if visits at this time of hour were of the norm for them. It was pitch dark out and although Lily didn't know the exact time, she could easily guess it was at least three in the morning. "Dumbledore," Lily said in return, her eyes flickering around the street behind him out of habit. "May I?" Dumbledore asked, politely indicating they should enter the threshold. "Oh, um, yes," Lily assented, stepping aside and allowing Dumbledore entrance. Dumbledore smiled still as he said, "I am truly sorry for waking you, but I assure you, what I have to say is of great importance." Lily nodded tiredly, stifling a yawn. "It's okay," she said, leading Dumbledore towards the kitchen and offering a cup of tea, which he courtly declined. "What's the matter?" Lily asked, concernedly, falling into the seat across the table from Dumbledore. "The time has come, Lily," Dumbledore began. Lily sat up attentively, frowning a little as she did so. "'The time'?" Lily repeated, nervously. Dumbledore nodded, affirmatively, "It is time, once more, for you and Harry to go into hiding." Lily inhaled sharply, holding her breath for a second before she murmured a sound of acquiesce. "The Fidelius charm?" Lily clarified, redundantly. Dumbledore dropped his head with care in concession.

"Is–is it Him?" Lily asked in a hushed whisper. Dumbledore regarded Lily warily and said, "It is a matter of Harry and your protection. I cannot afford to disclose more than that." Lily weighed this answer and countered, "But Harry–he's...is he in danger?" Dumbledore's eyes saddened, his smile fading as he said, "Yes, as are you." Lily felt a lump in her throat form and swallowed desperately, trying and failing to get rid of the feeling. "And you can't tell me why?" Lily questioned again, her tone more desperate and her eyes flashing to the kitchen window agitatedly. Dumbledore shook his head, resistantly.

Hiding.

Lily was all too familiar with it, she remembered what it had been like before. She remembered when she and James had first gone into hiding, the constant state of checking over her shoulder every few minutes, of closing the curtains as if it offered them extra protection, locking the doors only to repeatedly check again that she had indeed locked them with the never ending anxious paranoia.

"When? How long do we have?" Lily asked, breaking from her thoughts, the lump in her throat growing restlessly. Dumbledore checked his pocket watch and answered, "Sirius should be here soon."

"Sirius?" Lily repeated, "Tonight? We're performing the fidelius charm tonight?" Dumbledore straightened up, looking over Lily's shoulder for sign of Sirius, and said, "Yes." Lily shook her head distressingly, "Surely Headmaster, it could wait until morning, at least?" Dumbledore dismissed this as a point necessity, "I'm afraid not." Lily sighed, understanding why it had to be as such but wishing everything didn't have to happen so fast.

Regardless, whether it was the early hour or the resolve in Dumbledore's voice, Lily opted not to question the reason behind the urgency of the matter. If Harry was in danger, no matter why, Lily would do whatever it took to protect him. She'd known, with the changing times, that the protective charms she and Sirius and Remus had put in place could only last so long.

"Has Sirius already agreed to being the secret keeper than?" Lily said, realizing she hadn't discussed it with him. The plan had always been that if they ever needed to go into hiding again, Sirius would be secret keeper, but that plan had been made so many years ago, Lily wondered if he remembered. Even so, Lily knew, Sirius would likely fight anyone who tried to take his place as the secret keeper.

"Oh no. Sirius won't be your secret keeper," Dumbledore said, looking as if he'd thought that much was obvious. "H–he won't?" Lily said, taken aback by that. "It was my intention, if you'd agree to it, that I will be," Dumbledore offered, peering to Lily over his glasses. His expression was prudent. Lily blinked in surprise, looking around the kitchen, uneasily. Dumbledore as secret keeper? Lily hadn't considered that.

"Oh, um," She stammered awkwardly. "I understand, if you'd prefer Sirius, but I talked with him and he agrees, it might be safest," Dumbledore explained with apparent thought. Sirius agreed to this? "Right, no, yes. Of course," Lily said, her words hesitant. It did make sense...but Dumbledore? As if he didn't already have enough on his plate….

A knock sounded. Lily looked up, rounding the table and moving straight to the door. Lily opening the door, was Sirius revealed to be waiting. There were dark circles below his eyes and he looked tired, but still, Sirius carried the same light and mischievous smile across his lips. Lily couldn't help but smile in return. Sirius' playfulness had always been contagious. "Good morning, Lily," Sirius exhaled amusedly, stepping in and closing the door behind himself. Lily laughed lightly, making a point to keep her voice down as to not to wake Harry. Dumbledore, who had followed Lily back into the entrance room, stood to the side. "Shall we begin?" Dumbledore inputted, constructively. Lily looked to Sirius who raised his eyebrows challengingly, "Let's get this done with."

"And he didn't tell you why?" Remus said thoughtfully as he paced before Lily who lounged on the settee, her arms wrapped around a pillow comfortingly. Lily murmured in affirmation as she drew her knees in closer. Remus shook his head agitatedly, his eyes shifting across the floor as he paced. "It doesn't make sense?" He murmured restively. "No, it doesn't," Lily agreed as she sat up, crossing her legs, the pillow still tightly between her arms. "How did you know where to find us?" Lily added, realizing she hadn't asked it already, given the fidelius charm.

"Sirius, well Dumbledore. Sirius told me to go to Dumbledore," Remus answered easily. "Ah," Lily accepted; that made sense. An hour before, Remus had appeared at her door, and without question, Lily had ushered him–all too relieved to see him. He was scratched up, bad. His usual scars covered with fresher wounds, his eyes were hardened and his skin was paler. He looked exhausted and even more haunted than usual; maybe it was the fire's shadows which ran across the room which made her think this.

"I assume it has to do with the recent Death Eater activity." Lily said, tossing the pillow aside, Remus' behavior furthering her own apprehension. "Yes, I'd imagine so," Remus concurred, jabbing his hands in his pockets ardently.

Lily looked to the fire pensively, wondering how long she had until she went mad from hiding. Since she'd gone into hiding, some days before, an uneasiness had settled in both the house and in Lily. Just as Lily had predicted, she was right back to jumping at every creaking floorboard and flash of movement from outside. Even Harry had picked up on Lily's nerves, his innocent expression of concern evident everytime Lily would peer behind a curtain or lock another door.

"Mum?" It was as if he knew she was thinking of him, worrying for him. Lily looked from the fire to find Harry in his pajamas, his fingers fidgeting around his face–Harry rubbing the back of his hands to his eyes groggily. "Sweetheart," Lily sighed, gingerly. Remus stopped his pacing, at last, at Harry's arrival. "Uncle Remus!" Harry exclaimed excitedly as he entered the room, his eyes settling on Remus. Remus smiled, warmly, and Harry flew right to his arms. Remus knelt before Harry and smiled as he smothered the boy's hair parentally. "When did you get back?" Harry said, not hiding his disapproval at Remus' disappearance. Laughing lightly, Remus said, "Just today." Grinning, Harry said melodramatically, "Good, it's about time! You were gone forever!" Smirking, Remus nodded in agreement, "That I was."

"Harry," Lily said with a definitive tone as she wrapped an arm around his shoulder, pulling him back ever so slightly, "Couldn't you sleep?" Harry shook his head with purpose looking up to Lily, "Nope."

"Hmm," Lily breathed raising her brows suspiciously. "Uncle Remus, why were you away? Mum said you were working?" Harry said exasperatedly, turning back to Remus with a look of accusation that would've been amusing if it wasn't so genuine. "Yes, I was," Remus said, averting his gaze apologetically. Harry seemed to sense Remus' guilt because he smiled reassuringly and said, "It's alright. You're all scratched up, though? What happened?" Remus gave Harry a tired smile, "It's a long story, maybe another time." At this, Remus glanced to Lily who signaled with a gesture towards upstairs. "I think, for now Harry, you should head back up to bed. It's well past your bedtime, isn't it?" Remus pointed out, squeezing Harry's shoulder fondly. "I don't have a bedtime," Harry lied, making both Lily and Remus laugh outright. Harry looked proud that he'd managed to make them laugh. "Is that so? No one told me," Lily scoffed. Harry shrank a little at this but said bravely, "Well, I don't have to have a bedtime." Remus, obviously entertained by this, countered, "But you do have one, yes?" Harry made a show of thinking about this before he nodded, "Yes, because Mum says so."

"Exactly," Lily said with deliberately.

"Off you go," Remus chuckled, ruffling Harry's hair. Harry frowned but nodded, hugging Remus and than Lily one last time, saying a goodnight before he trudged up the steps disappointedly. "That boy," Remus whistled softly with a smirk. "Indeed," Lily agreed, adding with care, "He's a handful." Remus shook his head, "Don't I know it." Observing his timepiece, Remus continued as he stood up, "I'll get out of your hair, too." Not bothering to argue, because truthfully she was exhausted and could do with some sleep, Lily said, "Be safe, Remus, and we'll see you soon enough." Remus made a small motion of farewell, "Goodnight, Lily. You both be safe too. Things are getting dangerous out there."

"That they are," Lily said as she forced a smile, walking Remus to the door and giving him a small side hug in send-off.

Outside was dark and surprisingly settled given the times they lived in. Lily breathed in the cool air and listened to the evening breeze, she watched the darkness engulf Remus' retreating figure. Taking in the moment, Lily couldn't help but make the comparison the current world, staring out upon the sea of black, it all felt like a euphemism for everything unknown and dark that was to come.

 **A/N:** Ahhh, thank you all soo much for all the kind feedback! As a side note, since chapter one I've been inputting spacers between the sections of the chapters and then I re-enter them in the doc manager as well but it never sticks and I really don't like the page breaker on the doc manager, so for you the readers would it be better if I just inputted the page breakers between chapter sections or can you guys discern the breaks enough yourselves?


	24. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

"My Lord," said Severus prudently as he fell to his knees. "You've been busy, Severus. That much is obvious," The Dark Lord murmured tamely, playfully flicking his wand between his index and middle finger. Severus considered what he could say in response but elected silence instead. His head bowed, Severus kneeled in the middle of a dense forest, presumably somewhere on the outskirts of Scotland. Bearing in mind, Severus' attention wasn't exactly focused on what was around him and rather on his knees in obedience; so he could have very well been across the world and wouldn't be the wiser.

"Word is you have become quite intertwined with all the goings on, nowadays," The Dark Lord continued.

"My Lord?" Severus prompted, steadily, his eyes still on the ground below. "Hogwarts, the Ministry, St. Mungo's….Dare I say, you've made quite the...impact on our 'community'?" the Dark Lord elaborated in a droll, his tone light but meaning harsh and condemning. Allowing his gaze to drift upwards, Severus said, granting only relevant thoughts to surface in mind, "All in order to assist my position, which I trusted would remain of value."

"I see," the Dark Lord laughed darkly as he began to stride left and right. "And what position is that? Dumbledore's pet?" Setting his eyes, Severus said with set resolve, "As an ear on the inside, as a source–for you, for our cause." The Dark Lord hummed in amusement but said nothing, granting Severus permission to continue. "I assure you, My Lord, my position has only strengthened in your time away….My...involvement...within these institutions of jurisdiction are purely for the sake of tact on our front." Severus explained, dropping his eyes again in respect. "Hmm, is that so?" The Dark Lord mused, skeptically; Severus could sense the edge and doubt in his old Master's tone. Instinctively, Severus' mental barricades tightened. His occlumency skills were weakened, even with all the practice he'd undergone–practice could only do so much to prepare one for such an invasion. "Sources tell me, you've been not only assisting Dumbledore but helping him prevent my return. In fact, some went as far as to say you two are...a team?" The Dark Lord interrogated mildly, his interest evident but subdued. Severus had seen this coming, the interrogations of intentions and loyalties, Severus' Death Eater associates having forewarned Severus of what was to come. Yes, Severus was prepared, but that didn't stop the fear that, somehow, the Dark Lord would see right through him. It'd been a similar experience in the old days as well, feeling both prepared but susceptible. Nonetheless, as of yet, Severus' skills had yet to fail him and he was counting that they wouldn't break down now either.

"I'd hardly say that. However, I cannot deny that my position has imposed much time with both Dumbledore and those he associates with." Severus provided, not an entirely untrue account of Severus' time within the other side. "Hm, then your loyalties are still to our cause? To me?" The Dark Lord asked, regarding Severus' still bowed position. "Of course," Severus said, conveying all the assurance necessary. The Dark Lord was convinced: Severus had passed his test. "Stand–tell me why you saw it fit to maintain your position by Dumbledore's side, if no one foresaw my return?" the Dark Lord challenged, looking ever so slightly impressed by Severus' performance thus far. "I can't say I did, in all honesty, My Lord. I am ashamed to say so, but in truth, it seemed the safest strategy given my history. Dumbledore believed in me–vouched for me–given that, the choice was obvious." Severus explained, promptly. "Indeed….Self-preservation. I'd expect nothing less, from you." The Dark Lord laughed as he said this, it was a low laugh which didn't meet his expression. Severus met the Dark Lord's snake like eyes with fortitude, and the Dark Lord looked back with a newfound gleam of what could mistakenly be seen as reverence. Severus knew better than to fall for this, but he also knew, for now, he was safe.

"Preserve your position for now Severus. From what I've heard, I believe it could be of great assistance in the coming future," the Dark Lord instructed. "Yes, my Lord," Severus complied with a nod. "And, as soon as Dumbledore discloses my return, I expect to know," the Dark Lord said additionally and the command in his words was more than discernible. "Yes, my Lord," Severus repeated one last time before he was dismissed with a single gesture of the head.

"Lily," Sirius said, tightly, his patience worn. She wasn't listening. "Sirius, need I remind you he's not your son," Lily said sternly, her eyes fierce. "I know–he's James'," Sirius hissed lowly, apparently reaching his point. "And mine," Lily nodded, her arms crossed, holding her ground. All the amiability which had rested between the two when Dumbledore had come to Lily some nights before was gone–dissipated. Lily and Sirius always argued in circles, had done so since Hogwarts. And it seemed, James always centered these arguments. Well, James and Harry. Sirius and Lily had always had different ways of handling things, Lily had cried when James had died and Sirius had closed up, not allowing his feelings to surface. When Lily had decided it was time to return to work, Sirius had guilted her about being away from Harry while Lily had seen it as an opportunity for she and Harry.

And then there was the James argument.

Lily had always tried to balance James' role in Harry's life, as to not draw unneeded attention towards what Harry was missing: A father. Lily was cautious around the topic. She wanted Harry to know the good things like how much James had loved Harry and happy she and James had been with Harry. In the same, she also didn't want Harry getting carried away with the mere idea of his father. Lily didn't want Harry constantly dwelling on someone they'd lost, someone who couldn't help either of them anymore than an imaginary figure could. She couldn't risk Harry getting overly attached to someone who wasn't there, she couldn't allow Harry to rely on a delusion.

Pessimistic, yes.

Realistic, yes.

Lily could only support so much idealism.

Sirius, on the other hand, only supported the idealism of James. He told extravagant, romanticized, tales of he and James' Hogwarts days, of their adventures in the world. And Lily saw, she saw how Harry's eyes lit up in a wonderful and innocent way, in a way that told Lily Harry already thought the world of his father–which was great. But Sirius wouldn't let it die down, he never stopped with the tales and it drove Lily up the wall. The way that Sirius would practically boast of his relationship with James, something Harry could never have.

Make no mistake, Lily wanted Harry to love his father. She wanted her son to know of the James that Lily had fallen in love with, the one that had befriended Sirius and Remus so many years before, but Lily didn't want Harry to dwell in sadness or anguish, she wanted Harry to live, so unlike Lily had in the beginning. She'd been heart-broken and grief-stricken, and it had consumed her in a way she never wanted to happen to Harry. Lily knew the slippery line between despair and nostalgia. And, she knew Sirius was still consumed within the very same emotional vortex. Sirius lived in the past.

"Yes, but you never talk to Harry about him! I mean, you act as if he's just some–some random guy tied with you and Harry's existence–" Sirius was rambling. "You're nearing very close to a line, Sirius, I mean it!" Lily snapped, her temper rising. "What? It's true? Act as if you care just a little that that boy lost his father!" Sirius retorted, harshly. Lily drew in a deep breath, her skin tingling in a surreal manner, "That–that," Lily stuttered in resentment, "Is an awful, awful thing to say." Sirius hesitated, but only for a second before he said "It's true." Lily shook her head, her eyes welling with water, as she said defensively, "It's not. Harry knows how much I loved James and how much James loved us. I have never denied that. I just don't spend all my time rehashing the old days with a nine year old child!" Sirius scoffed, raising his hands up in mock-surrender, "Forgive me for telling the boy about his father!" Lily held her fingers to her temples, tiredly. "You're not forgiven," Lily ridiculed with irony. Lily wasn't even sure how the argument had escalated to this extent, but it had. Exhausted, Lily breathed out in desperation, "Harry's my son, Sirius, end of discussion. If you want to tell him sentimentalized anecdotes about James, fine. But, you have no right to criticize how I raise him or act as if you know better for him than me–" Sirius shook his head in contention as Lily spoke. "And, listen when I say," Lily continued, raising her voice to be understood, "If you continue this intrusive behaviour, I will make changes. Protecting Harry comes first, always, and if that includes protecting him from you–so be it." Sirius stepped back, his expression darkening at the not so veiled threat. Lily didn't mean it either, but she wasn't going to step down now. She couldn't. If Sirius continued to overstep in the raising of Harry, she had no choice. "That's not going to happen, ever," said Sirius sorely, his vision narrowing in a hurt demeanor. "I hope not," Lily said, her resolve on the matter settled. Sirius looked passed Lily, both falling silent. And then Sirius said tensely, "I'll see you around," as he walked passed Lily and left without another word. Lily drew in a sharp breath as the door shut, praying to all the gods she'd never actually have to part Sirius and Harry from one another.

Apparently it was a week of confrontation for Lily. Not two days after her blow up with Sirius, Lily found herself standing before the familiar oak doors. Having marched through the castle walls with the utmost of resolution, it was only now that Lily hesitated, standing before the office door with her first lifted to knock. Lily paused and lowered her fist and then raised it again and knocked curtly, three times. "Enter," Said the voice. Lily opened the door to find Dumbledore behind his desk, sitting with leisure. Smiling, his eyes carrying the usual twinkle which Lily had found absent in him more recently, Dumbledore greeted, "Welcome, Lily." Lily smiled in uncertainty but stepped forward at the invite, only to realize Dumbledore wasn't the only one in the office. Severus stood off to the side, his body faced towards Dumbledore, as if the two had been talking upon Lily's arrival. Why was it Severus always seemed to be everywhere, it was as if the world was working against her. "Oh, I–I'm interrupting?" Lily said in recognition. "No," Dumbledore answered easily, motioning for Lily to approach further. Closing the door behind herself, Lily obeyed with reluctance. Lily offered a polite nod of acknowledgement towards Severus but nothing more before she said, "I was hoping we could talk...in private?" Although Lily couldn't be certain, she thought she saw in her peripheral view as Severus rolled his eyes impatiently. Lily ignored him, something she'd become rather good at in recent weeks. "Ah, I see," Dumbledore nodded, before he turned to Severus, "Yes, right. Severus, shall we finish this another time?" Severus met Dumbledore's gaze equally when he nodded stiffly in compliance, though he looked irritated by the request. Severus walking passed Lily without a glance, Lily stepped aside in demure as he passed. "Come in, sit," Dumbledore offered once the door behind Severus had shut. Lily smiled timidly as she settled into the offered chair while Dumbledore continued, "What is it you wish to discuss today, Lily?" Lily wavered, indecisively, fastening her hands and setting them on her lap, anxiously. Dumbledore waited patiently until she said, quietly, "Severus." Dumbledore looked mildly surprised by this but smiled still nonetheless. "I see?" He said, thoughtfully, "Anything in particular or?" Lily laughed sheepishly as she said, looking to her hands momentarily before she glanced to Dumbledore, "He–he was a Death Eater?" Dumbledore did pause here, his eyes not leaving her, he said at last, "Is that a question?" Lily shook her head and clarified, "No. He told me."

"Did he?" Lily couldn't help but notice a twitch of opposition in Dumbledore's reponse. Lily nodded, gingerly. Dumbledore, opened his desk and pulled out a box. Opening it, he revealed the box to be filled with sweets. "Care for any?" He extended, pushing the box forward. Lily refused the offer and breathed exasperatedly, "I just–how can you be sure he's genuinely on our side? How can you risk–"

"Lily," Dumbledore said assuredly, seeing her growing worries, "I'm going to tell you just as I did the first Order meeting that Severus attended: I have no doubt whatsoever that Severus is on our side."

"But–" Lily began.

"I trust Severus with my life just as with yours or anyone else's," Dumbledore cut over, not allowing room for argument. "With my son's life?" Lily scoffed, skeptically. Dumbledore didn't miss a beat before he answered, "Yes."

"Why?" Lily asked, not understanding how Severus could go from one side to another without so much as an hint of doubt from Dumbledore. "Severus has his reasons, Lily. I promise, I wouldn't allow anyone access to the information he has unless I was more than certain of his loyalties," Dumbledore said, reassuringly. "What reasons could possibly grant anyone absolution for what they–he–has likely done?" Lily said unconvinced. "Hm," Dumbledore's eyes focused on Lily, contemplatively, "I don't believe absolution is what Severus is searching for, he only aims to rectify his own wrong doings as anyone in his position would. Absolution isn't what Severus is searching for–atonement, compensation, yes." Lily considered this. Severus Snape was a topic she'd given much thought, specifically since the big revelation. Although she had her doubts about the man, constantly, all her doubt seemed counteracted with her deep-rooted loyalty and belief in the man. She wanted to believe in the best possible of him. The Severus she knew, the one she'd watched grow from a boy in hand-me-down blouses to a man of apparent extrication, wouldn't do something with the motives of harm or violence. How was Lily supposed to accept that someone she'd been certain she knew so well was so completely different than her previous beliefs? How could Lily accept Severus as she always had, ever since the first day they'd met, given what he'd seen to be morally acceptable?

It gave Lily a migraine to even think about it all.

"I am certain that I've addressed all of the concerns you may have with Severus at one point or another, and time and time again, Severus continues to prove his loyalties," Dumbledore said with ration. Dumbledore met Lily's gaze earnestly with the same unflinching confidence in Severus. Lily swallowed roughly, unfolding her hands and flexing them meditatively. "And you can't tell me why you're so certain of this?" Lily asked, dubiously. "No, that is something you'll have to ask Severus yourself, I think," Dumbledore replied, his smile returning with a look of know. It was almost playful, the look Dumbledore wore. Lily lifted a brow, ambivalently to Dumbledore who stapled his hands in conclusion. Lily pursed her lips, beaten, and dropped her brow. "Now, as it appears I've answered all your questions, may I ask one?" Dumbledore asked formally. Lily looked up in surprise but nodded, "Yes, of course?"

"Don't you think, no matter how poorly you think of Severus in this moment, no matter how long you condemn him for his mistakes, Severus will never forgive himself for his actions? Have you considered that in his eyes, he will never be absolved for his mistakes?" Dumbledore asked, concernedly. Lily stiffened, uneasily. Lily hadn't considered that, not once. Had her actions been parochial? "If you have any further questions, I'd advise you bring them to Severus directly. For now, I have other matters to attend to unfortunately so I must dismiss you," Dumbledore finished properly, making Lily feel as if she was a student being sent away to class. "Thank you, Headmaster," Lily said earnestly, standing and pushing her chair in. "I'm glad I could be of help," He said in response, the lightness returning to his voice. Lily scanned Dumbledore and his office once over and left with a last motion of gratitude.

 **A/N** : As you, my lovely followers, can see, Lily's making progress given the recent revelation about Severus! We'll see if that's enough for forgiveness however! Thank you all for the follows and reviews as well, and a special shoutout to those of you who have been following this story since the beginning–it hasn't gone unnoticed!


	25. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

 **A/N:** Sorry all for the longer wait and I hope everyone likes this next chapter!

Not particularly listening as he rambled, Lily smiled warmly to her son. He'd been patient, surprisingly so, but the day had arrived. After much, much planning and prepping, Lily along with Remus and Sirius and the aid of Dumbledore had straightened out all the details. It'd been some weeks since Lily had realized she would have to tell Harry he couldn't have a birthday celebration given the state of, well, _everything_ , and it had left her utterly heartbroken. And, to make things worse, Harry had responded with such absolute maturity and understanding, it only furthered Lily's guilt. There was her son, then at the age of eight years old, completely unfazed by the ridiculous guidelines which he'd been forced into. Harry hadn't questioned her, he had simply given a mildly disappointed nod and forced a smile. It had been too much for Lily, she'd have to find a way to give her child the party he deserved, regardless of the deteriorating state of the world outside and the fidelius charm which confined them. It'd been hard to push her worries aside, hence the vast amount of protective charms that'd been placed around the small park they were to go. What if some Death Eaters caught word of the outing? What if the Death Eaters stumbled upon them somehow? The whole thing felt extremely risky and kept Lily up at night more than once. But then, she'd force herself to think of Harry's smiling face, and she knew it'd be okay. So, two weeks after the fact and when just about every precaution possible had to be taken, the day had arrived.

Ruffling Harry's hair only to have him duck away, Lily laughed as she went to move passed him. Lily retrieving her and Harry's overcoats, she handed Harry his coat as he continued to talk about all who'd be at the party and how high he'd fly his broom. Rolling her eyes amusedly, Lily offered murmurs of acknowledgment as she did up her own coat. "And Ron's going to bring his broom, too!" Harry said, excitedly. "Yes, so his mum said," Lily nodded kindly, wrapping her arm around Harry and guiding him out the door, Harry's broom tucked under his arm.

It was here that Lily's nerves began to kick in. Immediately looking around as they left the house, Lily knew the most dangerous part of the entire outing would likely be as they traveled from here to the park. Unprotected as they traveled, Lily had cast charms which would help keep their location remote but not undetectable. Down the garden path and onto the street, Lily consciously checked her coat pocket where her wand was at the ready. How utterly foolish, she realized, this entire thing was. She was risking so much, just so Harry could feel like the other children. Lily seriously considered just turning back then, her panic rising, but she didn't.

Lily took Harry's hand, pushing aside his resistance with a soft, "This way, darling." Leading Harry away from the open streets, Lily went to the corner where a bundle of trees laid to the side and offered shade. Checking over her shoulder and around the neighborhood, Lily's arm wrapped back around Harry with a _pop_.

The park was extensive and crowded. Families playing games in the fields, older couples walked hand in hand into the conjoined forest at the far end. Parents chased their kids, playfully, and kids squealed joyfully. "Wow," Harry smiled grandly from their place across the street from the park. A breath of relief, Lily smiled, nudging him forward. "Where's the party?" Harry asked suspiciously as he scanned the park for people he knew. "Well, since it's your special day, we set everything up in a special place," Lily said with a mischievous grin. Harry snickered and rolled his eyes in delight.

The area was concealed by a patch of trees within the forest portion of the park, although behind the trees was an open field. Lily had spent hours scouting the park before hand for the best location for the party, for a place which allowed flying space as well as concealment. She really had hit the jackpot, too. The place was perfect, in Lily's opinion and stepping into the space, she couldn't help but smile widely. Lily having arrived much earlier that same day, to help set up and secure the space, nothing compared to the sight of the place. There, confined in this sectioned off field, were children of her friends and friends of Harry's, laughing, playing, chasing one another. Lily's friends and other parents who were standing around chatted animatedly, while a few adults here and there joined in on the children's games. Lily could also spot a large amount of red-headed children flying on brooms. Lily looked to Harry who squirmed in excitement, his eyes glued forward at the party ahead. "Go on," Lily encouraged, affectionately. Harry grinned ear to ear, offered Lily a quick hug, and ran forward. Lily followed closely behind.

"Ron! Ron!" Harry called, waving at him vigorously. Harry could see Ron ahead, on his broom, not too far off. Harry was impressed, to say the least. Practically everyone he knew seemed to be here, from his uncles Sirius and Remus, to Ron and all his siblings, to Professor Dumbledore, who Harry didn't really know all that well. Everyone was smiling too, which made Harry smile even more. All these people, some he didn't know at all but were friends of his mum's, coming up to him and wishing him a happy birthday, telling him how big we was getting, it was chaotic! Ron approached Harry, his broom in hand. Harry was relieved to see his friend, a familiar face in all the chaos. "Hi, Harry!" Ron greeted. Ron was taller than Harry, with red hair, he had many many freckles and a pointed nose. Harry smiled, "Hey! Nice broom!" Ron smiled modestly and shrugged, looking like he disagreed. Harry was used to this, Ron always acted strange when Harry complimented him on anything he owned. Ron seemed convinced that everything he owned wasn't worth attention which Harry found odd. When Harry had asked his mum about it, she'd explained that he might feel self-conscious about his stuff because much of it was hand-me-down from his brothers. Harry didn't fully understand this, why Ron didn't like the hand-me-down stuff just the same, but then again everything Harry got was new and Ron's didn't. "I like yours," Ron said, his eyes falling on the broom in Harry's hand. Smiling, Harry said, "Thanks! It's a Nimbus 1500, it was my dad's." Ron nodded, looking over the broom discreetly. "Do you want to see it?" Harry said, handing Ron the broom before he could answer. "Wicked," Ron exclaimed, turning it in his hands. "Here," Harry motioned, taking Ron's broom. "You can ride mine and I'll ride yours for a little," Harry suggested mildly, as he looked over Ron's broom in return. Scoffing, Ron shook his head, "Nah, you don't want that."  
"C'mon," Harry smiled genuinely. Ron shrugged but didn't argue further, Harry could tell Ron desperately wanted to try his broom. "Suite it yourself," Ron said, dramatically. Mounting the broom, Harry looked to Ron, "Ready?" Ron nodded and they kicked off.

Harry loved flying, in fact, he was quite sure that asides from his mum's hugs, goofing off with Uncle Sirius, and waking up Christmas morning, there was nothing better. What was best about flying was the freedom and the wind in his face, he also liked that when we was flying, he didn't have to worry about people in public staring as they usually did, or if they did, he couldn't see it. Yes, flying was pretty great. Zipping around and around, Harry grinned, completely at peace. Ron's broom was slower than his usual and a little bumpy, but Harry still was ahead of Ron. Risking his chances, Harry went higher and higher and–"Harry!" His mum had noticed. "Lower, Harry," She said firmly. Sighing heavily, Harry dipped his broom and smoothly swooped lower. He liked going higher, but his mum never let him go really high like he wanted to. Ron followed Harry's lead, but had fallen a little more behind still, seemingly having issues with Harry's broom as he wasn't used to Harry's broom. "Everything alright?" Harry called. Ron gave a dismissive motion as Harry's broom shuddered. "Harry, come down now," Came his mum's voice once more. Doing as told, Harry landed shortly after Ron on the land below, although he secretly wished he could've flown longer, and on his own broom. Harry decided he didn't like Ron's broom as much as his own.

As Harry stepped further into the collected crowd, he realized how many unfamiliar faces there really were, like a man, with a mechanical eye which zipped left and right who Harry was certain he didn't know. "Harry," Mrs. Weasley smiled warmly, nodding towards the front where his mum and uncles were. His mum and uncles Sirius and Remus stood by the picnic table where a stack of parcels and a cake laid. The cake was large and decorated with the Gryffindor lion, per Harry's own request. By the time Harry reached his mum, a crowd around his mum had formed. His uncle Sirius pulling him into a side hug, ruffling his hair affectionately, Harry wriggled his way free of his uncle Sirius' grip. "Stop, stop," He laughed while his Uncle Remus laughed with Sirius at Harry's display.

"Settle down, settle down" his mum laughed dryly, making calming motions. Reluctantly, his uncle Sirius let him free and Harry theatrically displayed his relief as his uncle did so. "I'll tell you this, kiddo," His uncle Sirius smiled, so sincerely that Harry couldn't look away, "You're lucky your mum protects you." Harry laughed and saw, as he glanced to his mum, that she too was laughing. Only speaking once she'd stopped laughing, his mum announced loudly so all could hear that Harry was to open his presents next. A small applause followed this causing Harry to smile embarrassedly.

He really hated attention like this. "Go on, Harry," Uncle Remus said, encouragingly, indicating Harry's mum who keenly held up the nearest parcel. The first gift was A Wizard's Guide to Basic Broom Care, from one of his mum's friends. Then the next, a potions starter kit. "Wow! Thanks Mum!" Harry exclaimed as he opened this gift. The gifts continued, and then, they moved on to the cake. Harry had decided he wanted a Gryffindor-themed cake because his uncles Sirius and Remus were always talking about their time at Hogwarts, in Gryffindor, with Harry's dad. Harry didn't know much about his dad, other than what people had told him, but if his dad was anything like his uncles said, Harry wanted to be just like him someday. Harry wanted to be in Gryffindor and join the Quidditch team, too. For a second and only a second, Harry got really sad, because as much as he wanted to be like his dad and make his mum and uncles proud, he didn't know his dad. He never would know his dad. Forcing his attention back to his mum as she lit the cake candles, lighting all nine one at a time, then everyone around sang the Happy birthday son, loudly and out of tune in a way which made Harry smile nervously.

"A slice of cake for the birthday boy, first," his mum said warmly, kissing Harry's head before she handed him the plate. "Only two weeks late," Uncle Sirius said jokingly, making Harry chuckle. Immediately tucking into his cake without hesitation, those around laughed at his eagerness, but Harry didn't pay them attention. Harry's mum brushing his hair back, Harry said exasperatedly, " _Mum_ ," as he leaned away from her grasp, his eyes still on the cake in hand. And then there was a scream, a scream that gave Harry chills up and down his body. Before Harry could even look around, he was pushed to the ground and more screams–louder screams–sounded.

Severus paced the perimeter, his eyes narrowed as he tried to make out individual figures in the fight before him. Why Lily had thought it was safe to ever bring her child out to unprotected grounds was beyond him, especially for something as absurd as a birthday party. The boy's birthday was in July, was it not? It was mid August! Ridiculous, truly. And now, Severus was forced to pace and watch helplessly on the sidelines. Colors flew back and forth, curses and jinxes flying one after the other on both sides. He couldn't hear anything from within the protected boundaries but he could imagine well enough what curses and jinxes were being spat. Hidden deep within the forest trees, it was because of this that it took Severus so long to spot the familiar red hair. No sign of the boy yet however. In fact, as Severus looked closer, he couldn't spot any children from where he stood. Hopefully someone had been smart enough to gather the children and get them safely out. His eyes setting on Lily again, unintentionally, it was then that Lily was brought down. His body tensing, Severus' eyes narrowed more intently. It wasn't until Sirius Black–unsurprisingly–helped Lily up that Severus released a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. Immediately moving his gaze to the other figures on the field, Severus wished the allies would just leave so the attack could be done with. The whole purpose of the attack, in the first place, had been to get the boy, to catch them off guard while the dark side's revival was still beginning. The Ministry as of yet showed no sign of recognition to the Dark Lord's return, which meant the majority of the Wizarding world was still unaware of the looming war, though even the Ministry had noticed the growing changes.

A scream drew Severus' attention to the scene again. The boundaries which the Death Eater's had breached were now broken. From the looks of it, it appeared as if Bellatrix had broken the protective barriers inadvertently. She never did have control, reckless as ever. Sound drew attention, attention like the Ministry, the exact people who weren't meant to know about the attack. Severus wondered if anyone besides him ever listened to orders. The screams grew, uncomfortably so. Who was screaming? Severus stepped closer, but he couldn't locate the source.

The entire attack was going on far longer than it was meant to, the mission was meant to be quick and to the point: Get the boy. A mission Severus obviously expected them to fail. This was anything but quick and to the point. It was dragging on for both sides, while both's resolve was unwavering.

Slowly, but surely, and all too late, the field began to clear. One figure after the next disappearing, Severus could see Black still in adamant combat, showing no signs to leave. Severus watched disdainfully as Black took on two Death Eater's alone. Severus saw as fellow allies yelled to Black, telling him to leave, to get out now. Severus listened as they told Black, it was over.

 _Idiot._

"Severus," Severus froze, because he knew that voice all too well. It was a cold and bland voice. Severus considered what this looked like and then he considered what to say next. "Enjoying the show?" The voice pressed, uninterestedly. By Severus' side was none other than Lucius Malfoy. Lucius surveyed Severus, and then Severus looked right back.

 **A/N:** Thanks for all the follows and favorites and reviews and just for reading, you guys are so kind! I hope everyone liked the chapter? Feedback, constructive or otherwise, is welcomed.


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